ljdq | LJ Daily Answers: 8 May 06

chaosvizier.livejournal.com posting in

"I don't have to answer any of the questions this week because I got laid last night!" -

chershey

This excuse only applies if you got laid every night from 1 to 6 May. If you did, ROCK ON!

And onward!

1. What Danish author, born on 2 April 1805, wrote such tales as "The Goblin and the Huckster" and "The Metal Pig"?

"Oohh, the non American version of date formatting!" -

akiyasan

(I have to use day-month-year format at work. It's pretty much instinctive now. -CV)

"Dutch probabaly means a weird name." -

mcrunner03

(True. Luckily, we asked for a normal Danish name. -CV)

"I like Danishes. Mm, jelly-filled." -

kokopellinelli, although most other quizlings prefer cheese danishes.

"Denmark does not have authors, only cartoonists." -

thepikey

"The only Danish guy I can ever think of is Viggo Mortenson. Granted once I start thinking of Viggo Mortenson, I have a hard time thinking of anything else." -

jrho

"Charles Dikkens. That's Dikkens with two Ks, the well known Danish author." -

swampdweller

(+1, Monty Python. -CV)

"I think he now works for Blizzard creating new mobs for WoW." -

naraht

"One of the Brothers OMFG That's SCARY!" -

uncut_diamond

(Nope; Germans. -CV)

"A metal pig is sort of like Mooby, the false idol from Dogma. And really, who the hell makes a pig out of metal? It makes no sense whatsoever. So I say we roast that metal pig. It'll be an oh my god what the fuck barbeque." -

deltashade

"'The Metal Pig'. That sounds like every elementary school kid's nightmare - you try to get your savings out of your piggy bank, only to find that it's made of freakin' METAL and can resist your futile attempts to break it. I know I'd have been traumatized." -

rumershard

"You hear that Mr. Anderson?... That is the sound of inevitability... It is the sound of your death... Goodbye, Mr. Anderson." -

renee12321

(+1, The Matrix. -CV)

"I tried to read old Grimms brothers and Hans Christian Andersen fairy tales when I was younger. I really advise against that. After that, I stuck to Goosebumps. They were lame, but they don't have people chopping off toes." -

stormyskies

Correct Answer: Hans Christian Andersen

"May he be peaceful everytime he rolls over in his grave for every Disney movie bought." -

popehippo,

jessicamariek

(Amen. -AL&CV)

2. Which band's first album was "Middle of Nowhere"?

"Does this have to do with Sesame Street? '...Two hans have I , one two, I can wave good-bye, one two...'" -

csflick

"Sting." - when in doubt, at least 10 of you take a shot at it.

"The Navigators" -

kapnkaty

"I don't suppose it was HANk Williams by any chance?" -

ghymoreid

(No, but good try. -CV)

"Kansas. ;) Hee hee, get it? Because Kansas is the middle of nowhere. Uh, there is a band called Kansas, right?" -

chlaal

(Fair enough. -CV)

"Their next album was called 'Selling Out In The Big City'." -

puredeadthingy

"Kind of reminds me of Nevermind, actually. Which I'm sure is blasphemy since one is Nirvana and the other is Hanson." -

bizzatch

"I um...I like Hanson...and the Backstreet Boys. When a woman my age has a weakness for pretty boy bands, there's obviously something sexually perverse about me that I don't want to analyze." -

ginalin

(See

bizzatch's answer above, please. -CV)

"Once I literally ran into Taylor Hanson in a doorway, in Philly's Anthropologie. He looked greasier in real life." -

prettypinkkitty

"I hate Hanson. Because I looked like the middle one in Middle School. And I'm a girl. I'm not sure which one of us that insults more." -

renee12321

"I still say the younger one is a girl." -

halo4

"I'm about to 'mm-bop' that CD in the garbage disposal!" -

rumershard

"i always thought their song 'man from milwalkee' was about child molestation. i can't explain it. 'sitting beside me was a man with no hair. and from the look on his face, and the size of his toes, he comes from a place that nobody knows.' please. it screams pedophile." -

therhythmthief

" Amazingly, after several years, they stopped looking like girls.

Thank god for puberty." -

jessicamariek

Correct Answer: Hanson

3. Who composed the soundtrack for "The Rock" (the movie, not the wrestler)?

"Paper" -

woap
"Scissors" -

jrho

(You're both wrong. Tiger Hand! -CV)

"The same folks who wrote 'I wanna take you for granite'?" -

mrbigsteve

(I'm sure AL is wincing in indigneousnation. -CV)

"OMG THERE TOTALLY SHOULD BE A SOUNDTRACK FOR THE ROCK, THE WRESTLER. Brilliant idea,

ljdq people! Or are you people? I have my suspicions of you guys being EVIL MONKEY ROBOTS." -

lucymalfoy

(To be fair, Jackie Chan has his own soundtrack; why not The Rock? -CV)

(GODDAMMIT, I AM NOT A ROBOT. OR A MONKEY. -AL)

"I now have an image of Dwayne Johnston dancing to 'The Winner Takes It All' on Alcatraz in my mind, Thanks a lot, mods!" -

germankitty

(This is totally not our fault. -AL&CV)

"Must... resist... joke about... what he was... smelling at the time..." -

popehippo

(I assure you, Resistance Is Futile. -CV)

"I remember - the Rock was about Alcatraz and it's kitchen. People on shore would say 'I can smell what the Rock is cookin'!'" -

drbear
"Can you smeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeell what the Hans Zimmer is cooking?!" -

buzz

"Oh, that Miami Vice guy...Hans Zimmer. I miss the pastel jackets and no socks look, and I don't know why." -

ginalin

(Right answer, wrong logic. Jan Hammer did the Miami Vice music. Close enough, though. -CV)

"I don't remember anything about that movie except Nicolas Cage was annoying and Sean Connery was all bad-ass. You gotta be pretty sad if you're out-bad-assed by a guy who is in his 70's, even if he used to be James Bond." -

lyme
"All I remember about that movie was Nicholas Cage forcing a syringe into his heart. At that point, I remember severe nausea and nothing else." -

hellpaladin2183

"Danny Elfman, because he composed all the soundtracks in the history of the world." -

kokopellinelli
"John Williams. He composed everything." -

krick

(Both wrong. It's the other guy who composed everything. -CV)

"How the heck can you make fun of a name like Hans Zimmer?" -

whomajigi
"Invader Hans." -

kimpire

"Hans 'I make all soundtracks sound the same and somehow use Lisa Gerrard in everything I do these days' Zimmer." - ANONYMOUS

Correct Answer: Hans Zimmer

"The only reason I remember his name is that I like words that start with Z. Like... zeppelin. And zephyr." -

dreamoflight

4. Who won the 1967 Nobel Prize in physics for his work on the theory of stellar nucleosynthesis?

"Stelllllllllllllaaaaaaaar!" -

kimpire,

ntlespino

(+1, A Streetcar Named Desire. -CV)

"I lost you after the 'the'..." -

melayneseahawk

"WTF is stellar nucleosynthesis?" -

uncut_diamond

(Let's ask the experts:)

"Stellar - referring to stars, or something that is fabulous. Nucleo - relating to the inside of a cell. Synthesis - putting two things together. So apparently, this man was cloning fabulous celebrities and turning them into Siamese twins." -

lisacharly
"'Stellar' pertains to stars. 'Nucleo' means center (or something) and 'synthesis' means fake. I can totally do this. It's the science of making fake star-centers. Fake means fur, star means Betelgeuse, and center means tootsie rolls. Furry chocolate Betelgeuse." -

kokopellinelli
"Isn't that one of the processes you use to make crystal meth?" -

potassiumman

(Now you know. And knowing is half the battle. -CV)

"Marvin the Martian." -

prettypinkkitty

"Chuck Norris." -

renee12321,

lyme,

shadowkeeper

"Terry McMillan, who also wrote the less well recognized novel 'How Stellar Got Its Groove Back'." -

dslartoo

"Dolly Parton. Come on, it's possible." -

jonem

(I heard her nuclei were not synthetic, if you know what I mean. -CV)

"Hank McCoy... but before his mutation came to light. Once it did, he had to give up the nobel prize." -

umbralcorax

(Good job, keeping with the theme. Even though Reed Richards totally would have done it better. -CV)

"Hokey religions and ancient weapons are no match for a good theory of nuclear physics at your side, kid." -

drdoug

"I thought that the work on Totally Awesome Nucleosynthesis was much more deserving of the prize.. but what do I know." -

tarpo

"Someone German, I'm sure. They're always so sciency, those Germans." -

cyrrus25

"Hans Bethe was a total hottie." - ANONYMOUS

"Hans Bethe was like the Superman of atomic physics. He worked on everything from astrophysics to the Manhattan Project to the Lambshift. And I'm pretty sure he could shoot lasers from his eyes." -

mcrunner03

Correct Answer: Hans Bethe

5. Which dynasty succeeded the short-lived Qin dynasty of China in 206 BC?

"I didn't think any of the Chinese dynasties succeeded too well. That's why they aren't around anymore." -

kimpire

"In communist China, dynasties succeed joo!" -

shadowkeeper

"I had Chinese food for dinner. Instead of fortunes, cookies should give little facts about Chinese history. That would come in more useful than, 'Smile! Things are looking up!'" -

stormyskies

"I never took Chemistry or History in high school, so I wouldn't know..." -

jaded110

(I'm not certain taking Chemistry would have helped you too much... -CV)

"Were they the ones from Mulan?" -

jrho

(If Disney said so, then probably not. -CV)

"漢朝!" -

prettypinkkitty

(Well, we have no clue what's going on here, so you can have a +0.5 for good measure. -CV)

"That would be the prestigious Gin dynasty, famous for their drunken orgies that brought great honor to their families." -

deltashade

"The Qix dynasty. Ended fairly quickly even though Mikey REALLY liked it." -

tarpo

"The Ming the Merciless dynasty." -

squeegibo

(+1, Flash Gordon. -CV)

"That would be the Harrington Dynasty, arch rivals of the Knots Landing." -

mrbigsteve
"I knew Linda Evans and Joan Collins were well preserved but I didn't realise they'd been around for more than 2200 years." -

drdoug
"I'm pretty sure that ABC News came after Dynasty." -

sskipstress

"The Han Solo dynasty. What? China in 206 BC doesn't qualify as 'a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away?'" -

dslartoo

"It's the Han dynasty, which is actually a misnomer. The name comes from the disgruntled common folk, who made fun of their incompetent emperor by claiming he masturbated too much, earning the name (translated from the Chinese) 'Handy nasty'. One mis-spacing typo in the historical scrolls of the empire changed the name, and the rest is history." -

i_calql8

Correct Answer: The Han Dynasty

6. Come on, share the love: what's the best thing about my buddy chaosvizier?

"His pimp cane." -

thesecondevil

"He's a Vizier of Chaos. What's not to love?" -

alliterator
"He's a vizier! Traditionally, he'd be plotting to marry the king's daughter and kill at least her father off. Possibly her too, depending on her hotness level. But he's cast aside the cultural pressures and decided to devote himself to entertaining the masses through trivia. Well done,

chaosvizier. We're all very proud. Unless you've already ousted the old king, and just do the quiz because you don't spend all your time plotting anymore, in which case...we bow before you. (Seems safest.)" -

v827

"He toots gin immodestly and spends most of his free-time in the upchuck." -

david_deacon

(I have no idea what this means. And I'm OK with that! -AL)

"He hates those jerks over in Pod Six!" -

thepikey

"I'm going to have to say that it's his ability to wear that little black dress and those heels and just make it WORK!" -

halo4

"obviously that he advises chaos. what's chaos without a little guidance?....why it's.....um, you get it." -

slanciante

"

chaosvizier is a snappy dresser!" -

potassiumman

(BWWWAAAHAHAHAHA!! -AL&CV)

"He's insanely funny, but lives far enough away that I don't have to worry much about the insane part." -

wendynat

"Most people say it's the peanuts, but I actually think the caramel is what makes it great. No, wait, I'm thinking of a Snickers bar. My bad. As for

chaosvizier, the best thing about him is his almost supernatural ability to hold his liquor. Between him and me, we average out to one semi-normal person's alcohol tolerance. As for what else might be between him and me, well that's really none of anyone's business and anyway this is a family LJ. Ahem." -

chlaal

"If a small cult in Massachuttes is to be believed, he will eventually either save the world or destroy it." -

foodcourtdruid

"I promised not to tell a soul about that night, though if you were on my friends list you could read all about it in the filtered entry I hid from him." -

naraht

"He's a cheap date. At least he doesn't require lobster and Chateau de Rothschild. Pudding and cheap tequila will do." -

judith_s

(Actually, pudding and/or tequila will do. -AL)

"He listed Unreal Tournament as an interest. Dude, I was obsessed with that game when I was twelve!" -

originalcracker

"The best thing about CV is that he plays Diablo II. And he appreciates puns. Diablo II and puns, puns and Diablo II. The two best things about CV are that he plays Diablo II and appreciates puns. And he eats baby animals. The three best things about CV are that he plays Diablo II, appreciates puns, and eats baby animals. And his almost fanatical devotion to Hopkin Green Frog. The four best things... no, among the better things... I'll come in again." -

deltashade

"I love the skillful way he beat the other girls to the bride's bouquet." -

sskipstress

"Builds strong bodies twelve ways, has eleven herbs and spices, you think he's butter (but he's NOT), he's as bold as the Rockies, the heartbeat of America, he's Ram tough, a quicker pickerupper and cleans tough stains so you don't have toooooo." -

motown_deserter

(If only you knew the historical funny of calling CV the Quicker Picker Upper. -AL)

"Well he is worth 28 points in Scrabble without any bonuses.. Thats pretty sweet" -

tarpo

"The best thing about him is that even though he has considerable deflection plating in the form of his Jedi Mind Trick, he does actually allow the tough and determined to know him as more than just that funny guy in the black suit. He is my evil twin and a great friend." -

barbarienne

(Awwww... -CV)

And that's the quiz, in honor of

chaosvizier's birthday on Cinco de Mayo. Unlike

angledge, he's ancient, so it's more of a countdown to the day when his liver finally ruptures in a pudding-and-liquor-filled explosion of tasty goodness. Shouldn't be too much longer. So happy birthday to him, happy Mexico day to... Mexicans, and tune in tomorrow for more quizzy goodness. Same bat-time, same bat-channel!

Rock on,

AL&CV

Current Mood: yo quiero Taco Bell
Current Music: Canta y no llores