LJ Daily Answers: 6 February 2006

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

"May I take this moment to observe that the stray dogs of Delhi are the smartest critters on the planet? They look both ways before crossing the street. That, my friends, is evolution in action." - barbarienne

You mean intelligent design. Let's not get all scientific here, eh? (SARCASM, FOLKS! SETTLE DOWN!)

LOTS of first-time players this week! Welcome aboard, everyone. May you be more intelligent than the dogs of Delhi - which we can't always say for our normal crop of Quizlings, heh.

Alright, enough mean. Here's the stuff you've been waiting for.



1. C. Calvin Broadus is better known by what stage name?

"Hobbes" - A whole lot of you
"Calvin Coolidge" - Not as many of you

"Marty McFly occasionally sang using his real name, Calvin." - dhud98

"Oh... what's his face from the early days of the WWF... oh yeah... The Junkyard Dog." - pheltzer

(No, but nice old-school wrestling reference. -CV)

"See Calvin's Broad Ass." - sskipstress
"I read that as C. Calvin Broadanus." - animagiblender
"'C. Calvin Broadass' is entirely too lame a joke and I am not going to post it." - october31st
"You know, when I first read that I thought it said 'C. Calvin Broadass', and immediately pictured some guy walking around destroying doorways with his cheeks of doom, casting a great two-humped shadow of terror upon anyone below (which, unless he was very tall, would be midgets and Oompa-Loompas - he's 'Broadass', not 'Tallass') and posing as a movie critic." - thomas_small

"CCB. Which is coincidentally the alternate universe name for the BBC." - fence_post

"C.C. B. DeMille" - 1messdupchik

"Biggus Dickus, I think I saw him in an ad for Calvin Klein." - ANONYMOUS

"Liberace. Why? Because I have a yellow birdhouse" - kokopellinelli

(And this week's ljdq Non Sequitur Award goes to... kokopellinelli! -CV)

"McGruff the Crime Dog." - pyllgrum

"" - finding_rowan

"I would like to point out that I am a white boy, who grew up in one of the whitest neighborhoods in Connecticut (seriously, 92.1% white) and even I know that Calvin Broadus is Snoop Dogg." - richcsigs

(Good job there, homie. -CV)

"My mom actually REALLY likes Snoop Dogg. So much so that she has a little doll of him in her car as a good luck token. Points to my mother?" - fallendebre

(-1 to your mother. -1 to you too; genetics. -CV)

"Snoop Doggy Dogg is neither a Snoop, nor a Doggy, nor a Dog. Discuss." - arib

Correct Answer: Snoop Dogg

"I never quite got the hang of that izzle-speak." - thevioletangel

(You're a better person for it. Really. -CV)



2. What is the name of the movie that follows the adventures of the Z-Boys as they skateboard through the 70s and 80s?

"I don't believe it. I can't pull off the punchline about how gay sex and skateboarding are alike. It's like you've imbued the question with Quiptonite. You deserve that pun for your treachery." - portkey

(Well, AL did write the question, after all. -CV)

"Dude, Where's My Skateboard?" - woap

"Wheel Before Zod!" - deltashade

"Snakes on a Skateboard" - profsparky

"Limozeen: 'but they're in space!'" - cmzero

"I don't know, but whatever it is, that's what inspired that scene in The Two Towers where Legolas takes a piece of wood and uses it to slide down the stairs while shooting arrows at the orcs." - ANONYMOUS

"They've got time travelling skateboards? Where can I get one? Of course, I'd probably wipe out and get stranded in the 1930s or something." - arib

"I tried skateboarding once, but when first putting a foot on a board I fell right on my arse on the assphalut (is that why the word ass is in that?), it kind of ruined my enthusiasm." - midnightnymph

"Was this the one where Goku and Krillin beat up a bunch of aging hippies bent on returning the world to the 60s via time-traveling mystery machine?" - neev
"Dragonboard Z." - fence_post
"Since when did the creators of Dragonball Z start doing skateboard movies?" - ladyiapetus

"I guess ZZ-Top used skateboards before getting that neat red ZZ car. Wonder if their beards got caught in the wheels while they zipped along on the skateboards? Maybe that's why they switched them out for the car." - wendynat

"something about dogs and scruffy, feral looking Heath Ledgers." - sometimespez

"It was 'Kings of Dogtown' or 'Knights of Dogtown,' at least, 'something of Dogtown' wasn't it?" - ririkit

"Where is Dogtown, anyhow? I suspect it's in New Jersey. Or am I thinking of Guidotown?" - marasca

"Lords of Dogtown. Or Dogtown and Z-Boys. I've seen neither. But the latter one always makes me thing of bad accents. 'Vee haff Dogtown, and vee haff...zee boys.'" - caffeineod

(Many folks mentioned "Dogtown and Z-Boys", which was a documentary, but nonetheless one released to theaters in limited distribution after Sundance. You may have half-credit, because come on, who watches documentaries? -CV)

(Didn't you watch "March Of The Penguins"? -AL)

(Quiet, you. -CV)

Correct Answer: Lords of Dogtown

"I saw that movie and was board the whole time." - dhud98



3. Vocabulary Pop Quiz! What word is defined as "crudely or irregularly fashioned verse, often of a humorous or burlesque nature"?

"Bible" - flawed_karma

(+1 for blasphemy. -C)

"chaosvizier" - uncut_diamond, richcsigs

(+1 for balls. -C)

"Crude, irregular, humorous, and burlesque...Words used to describe Paris Hilton's wardrobe. I mean, when she wears clothes." - whiski_sour

"Britney." - kolys
"Joan Rivers?" - animagiblender
"Bushism" - october31st, lukeii
"Fanfiction." - green_queen

"The typical ljdq post" - drbear, naimhdearg, jrho, lots42, mistyraven, wendynat, handgun

"Limerick." - lots of you
"There once was a man from Nantucket...." - lots more of you

"The limerick packs laughs anatomical
Into space that is quite economical
But the good ones I've seen
So rarely are clean
And the clean ones so seldom are comical."
- jonem

"There once were three mods on LJ
Who said 'we invite you to play
Let's do a mean quiz
And puzzle the kids
By calling it daily, but posting it weekly and not giving a damn about meter, either!'"
- germankitty

Correct Answer: Doggerel

"Man, I'm not a lesbian but I could watch Burlesque dancers for HOURS!" - ketaki



4. What is the brightest star in the night sky, and in which constellation can it be found?

"That all depends on which planet you're viewing it from, doesn't it? GOD, I get sick of all this pro-Earth propaganda! There are OTHER planets, you know!!" - wendynat

"I saw 'star' and immediately thought 'Britney Spears', but then I saw 'brightest' and decided to think of someone else." - popehippo

"Chuck Norris. And he's such a big star, that's not a constellation, that's just a bunch of other stars who wanted to be cooler by association." - altoidsaddict

"Celine Dion - it's the moon reflecting off her teeth." - jonem

"That would of course be Newton-W, the universe's only tan star, in the constellation Vayguisbeibee." - ilgreven

"Nobody knows who struck first, but we know that it was the humans who ruined the sky. The machines were reliant on good taste, you see, and it was falsely believed that by installing Keanu Reeves' band Dogstar into the sky, the machines would fail. Subsequent renaming of the star to Sirius was also unsuccessful, serving only to attract Pottersues and slashers. The entire episode is now known as Canis Major Screwup." - malhablada

"'Surely, you can't be Sirius!'
'I am Sirius. And don't call me Shirley.'" - csi_tokyo3

(+1, ... Airplane? Or HP? Forget it, -1 for confusing me. -AL)

"Sirius, a.k.a. the Dog Star, can be found in the Doghouse Constellation, along with the Forgetful Husband Star." - hellpaladin2183

"The Dog Star. Now I also want to say Barnard's Star. Maybe that should be St. Barnard's Star. I'm gonna go with Ursa Major on the constellation. Although that probably leads on to dog/bear furry slash fic. Which I think is such a nasty thought I'm gonna have to put the internet down, walk away slowly, and actually do some work now." - esran

"Sirius, the dogstar *revelation* Hey, Sirius Black was a Black dog! It all fits now! " - kittikattie

(+1, being the only squeeing HP fan to actually tie your HP answer to the actual question. Good show! -AL)

(The rest of you: -1. Unless you said something about Remus Lupin & Sirius Black, in which case: -2. -AL&CV)

"Sirius aka The Dog Star aka Canicula aka canis majoris it's actually a binary star-system if I remember correctly; part of Big Dog constellation." - b_hulsmans

(Aaaand since you're apparently still in nerd mode, you can appreciate your shiny new Geek of the Week Award! -AL)

(With a shiny -1! -C&CV)

"Sirius, Star of subscription radio. I can't believe people pay money for radio, and pay even more for radio with Howard Stern." - motown_deserter

(I might pay money for radio withOUT Howard Stern. Or, I might just turn the dial for free. -AL)

"Here's a cool, ubergeek link:
http://antwrp.gsfc.nasa.gov/apod/ap000611.html" - barbarienne

Correct Answer: Sirius (the Dog Star) in Canis Major (the Big Dog)



5. What band was formed from a combination of members from Pearl Jam and Soundgarden?

"Pearlgarden sounds too Disney and Sound Jam sounds like the rejected name for Sparkle Motion." - fence_post

(Maybe that's why they didn't use either one of those names. -AL)

"Hey, if you let me be Queen of the world again, I could make a Pearlgarden!" - mistyraven

(No, it was a big enough mistake the first time around. -AL)

"I like to think it was Jam Garden. They sang songs about preserves and perennials." - azure_dragon

"Pearl Necklace hur hur hur" - grapefruitzzz

(+1. -CV)

(-1. -AL)

(-1. -C)

"Mum infected me with grunge while I was still a baby, which is why I'm so emo nowadays." - merepoonts

(I feel .... old. -AL)

"Trick question. Trick question. Any musical questions always have the answer 'Sting'. Don't they?" - avron

(Uhhhh, well this is Sting's favorite band. -AL)

"It's Audioslave, isn't it?" - neev, badgerbabe

(Audioslave is made up of Chris Cornell from Soundgarden and members of Rage Against the Machine. Good guess, though. -AL)

"My cousin and her friend sang 'Hunger Strike' at a talent show once, and ever since then I've thought of Chris Cornell's lines as 'the girl's part'." - miss_katelynne

"I had a huge fight with a friend of mine after 'Hunger Strike' came out because I liked Chris Cornell and she liked Eddie Vedder (we were like 13 or 14). She was all 'Pearl Jam is soooo much cooler than Soundgarden. Spoonman, wtf is that?' And I was all 'Pearl Jam makes me want to cut my wrists' and she said that maybe I should so we haven't talked since then. Clearly I was right to worship Chris at the Temple of the Dog as he's the only one with a career anymore and he's still hot. Also, I heard that girl got herpes." - morganashkevron

"In the so-called 'Temple of the Dog', they worship all that is stick-fetching, ball-catching, and panting like (what else) a dog." - hellpaladin2183

"Those who worship in the Temple Of The Dog are forced to fetch water and sticks every day for the monks." - tofusquirrel

Correct Answer: Temple of the Dog



6. Are you a cat person or a dog person? (NO FURRY STORIES.)

(First off, the statistics:)

Dog people: 33
Cat people: 56 (of which 7 specified "pussy")
Both: 13
Neither/Other: 13
Gibberish: 30

(In addition, many of you posted pictures of your fuzzy friends. Let's just accept that everyone who posted a picture posted something cute, and we won't hog everyone's bandwidth by linking 60+ different photos. Trust us; it was a veritable cuteness shmorgasbord.)

(And now, the highlights:)

"cute dogs on a leash in the park are chick magnets, and cats on a leash scratch your eyes out." - dhud98

"Finally a question I can get right... I'm a cat person... no, dog person... no cat.....ahhhhhhhhhhhh..... *goes flying off the bridge into the abyss*" - pheltzer

(+1, Monty Python and the Holy Grail. -CV)

"what do you people have against snakes? A python will never shed on your new sweater and you can train it to lie on lintels and fall on the heads of people who break in at night. It'll even clean up after the corpse! How many dogs do you know who will be up at two am quietly and efficiently disposing of the evidence!?" - dhaunea

(I have nothing against snakes. Many ages ago, I lived in an apartment whose residents included one boa constrictor. The tales from that apartment are those of terror and woe. -CV)

"I'm a cat person in a dog person's body" - ANONYMOUS
(Much later in the week...)
"I just realized I forgot to write 'trapped' in there. The sentence has a completely different meaning without the 'trapped'". - ANONYMOUS

"Turns out, I was attacked by a neighbor's dog when I was three or so, and have been less than fond towards most dogs ever since." - arib

"Cat, though it could be questionable. The cat that lets us live with it acts more like a dog sometimes - chews on a rope toy, chases his tail. Odd little feline. Tried to enter my brain through my nostril the other night. When that didn't work, he stuck his tongue up my nose. I'm still not sure if he did it for lubrication, or just to try and reach my tasty brains from there. On second thought, maybe he's just a zombie feline." - dv8dragonfly

"I was Cheetarah in my past life. I finally died of dramaqueenitis. That and Panthro bitchslapped me. He did give me fair warning. He said if I faint from psychic overload one more time...." - herm42

"Bestiality! Keeping the people of Louisiana occupied since 1886!" - jonem

"I consider myself to be more of a cat person, even though my cats killed a squirrel and ate its head. Or maybe I'm a cat person because of that. Either way, headless squirrel found in my garage in the middle of summer. The smell was not something you'd find marketed by Glade Plug-ins." - whiski_sour

"I prefer cats. Cats = lions. Where can you find lions? Only in Kenya." - bigredcandle

(I will not link to it I will not link to it I will not li- ah, fuck. -CV)

"I'm bipetual." - fence_post

"I believe Triumph the Insult Comic Dog said it best [in this somewhat NSFW language link]." - richcsigs

"I'm a mawg, half man, half dog, I'm my own best friend" - ANONYMOUS

(+1, Spaceballs. -CV)

Correct Answer Of Foretelling Nature: "I want to buy a yak and ride him around the streets of Detroit. (And if I can buy one by this weekend, I'll spray paint him yellow and black. Yay for the Steelers!)" - sienna_blaze



Only two people understood the nature of the theme- yes, it was dogs, but underlying that was that it was Chinese New Year, and for them it is the Year Of The Dog. Well done, undeadgoat and wuwt!

For fans of American Football, congratulations go out to Pittsburgh Steelers fans, and consolation to Seattle Seahawks fans. For people like me who don't know much about football, I hope you all got really loaded. I would have, but I had to drive, so I settled for getting other folks really loaded. Go me!

And in other news, Happy February. See you all tomorrow, same bat-time, same bat-channel!

Rock on!

AL&CV&C

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[jered-cain.livejournal.com]

I know a few people who could use one.