LJ Daily Answers: 20 August 2004

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

As most of you detected, the theme of this week's quiz was the Olympics, in honour of the XXCVIHMDD'th Olympiad being held in Athens, Greece at this very moment. On behalf of the LiveJournal nation, we would like to thank all of our competitors for for their efforts on this week's Quiz, especially the six first-time players. We were going to have a ticker-tape parade for you all, but angledge forgot to file the parade permit application in time (cut her some slack, she's been sick this week).

1. What's the name of the tallest mountain in our solar system?

"doomgirl's Breasts. Okay...maybe not." - doomgirl

(+1, purported buxomness. But while those peaks may be very high mountains, there are those that are still higher. -AL)

"Dolly Parton" - ghostwriterxx

(Higher still ... -AL)

"Pandora Peaks." - lizature
This link is absolutely Not Safe For Work (NSFW). Don't click unless you're down with naughty pics!
This link is even more NSFW than the above. You have been forewarned. Lizature is a naughty panda.

(And we have a winner! The LJDQ NSFW Award this week goes to lizature! -CV)

(That looks so incredibly PAINFUL. -AL)

"Mons Veneris." - evils

(A much more subtle use of pr0n. +1. -CV)

"It's probably one on that planet that's been hiding behind Pluto - the one with the alien potato-head base. (You remember Mr Potato head. One of his kind was in Toy Story - you get to swap his bits around. It isn't natural - and it's an unearthly idea)" - verdandiweaves

(Swapping your bits around is not natural. But in the end, Mr. Potato Head was nothing more than a food waiting to be eaten. That was his weakness, in those final hours. -CV)

"The Fresh Kills Landfill on Staten Island. Oh, come on. It might not be the biggest mountain now, but it will be." - b7cy

(It's already the highest point on the Eastern Seaboard. True! -AL)

"Mount Olympus." - a whole mess of you

(Judges ruling?
Mount Olympus: Location- Greece; mythological home of the gods which made it really tall in stories; in reality, not that tall
Olympus Mons: Location- Mars; Latin name for Olympus Mountain; ancient volcano; really tall
Judge #1's commentary: Surely, everyone knows that Everest is the highest mountain on Earth, right? So
how was Mount Olympus ever going to be the right answer? We don't just make up facts here at the LJDQ. -AL
Judge #2's commentary: I think warm rice pudding is superior to almost all other forms of pudding out there. -CV
Final verdict?

XXX!

-AL&CV)

"I liked the bit where Dr Manhattan visits it." - fizrep

(+1, Watchmen. -CV)

(-1, Geek of the Week. -AL)

"Valhalla (oh wait! Maybe I just thought of the real answer! Isn't there a Monds Olympus on some other planet?)" - marasca

(+1/2, nearly pulling the answer out of your butt. -AL)

"Mt. Doom" - snigglefritz

(Tall only if you’re a hobbit. -CV)

"I reckon reckon thats mt everest, oh hang on a second... in the solar system, my thats sneaky. OOh, you are as cunning as a cunning fox thats taken a course in cunningness (thats Cunningness, NESS I tell you, not anything dirty you might be thinking off. Shame on you!). So, would that be mt Olympus on Mars?" - _j0k3r_

(Man, there’s no pulling the wool over your eyes, even by a cunning linguist such as myself. -CV)

(CV, Cornell University, 1994, BA in linguistics. -AL)

"Space Mountain." - Two of you. Dirty Disney tools.

Correct Answer: Olympus Mons, on Mars

"Some nerdy NASA guy probably named a mountain on some planet or moon after it anyway" - tiegra

2. There were several differences between the ancient Olympic Games and today's version. If the old-style rules were reinstated, which change would be the most obvious?

"I believe the participants in the ancient Olympics were nekkid. And surprisingly enough? They were still boring." - b7cy

"‘Kill or be killed’? That rule was abolished from many games, unless I am confusing the Olympics with ‘gladiator' events, and has since been re-instated in politics. " - alyaat

(That’s more of an unwritten rule nowadays. Only Tonya Harding and a few Palestinians tried to take it to its logical conclusion. -CV)

"While I wouldn't mind some of the swimmers running around naked (especially Lenny Krazylberg or even one of those South African guys), I'd have the draw the line at the Sumo wrestlers." - notevenu

(Happily, sumo wrestling is not an Olympic sport. However, we probably are all better off not seeing some of the weightlifters au naturel. - AL)

(We’re in total agreement here. -CV)

"The nekkid men sprinting 100 meters, and then clutching their genitalia in agony as they realize that it's just a little too warm today." - dougygyro

"the amount of after-race chafing" - crostfingrs

"The corporal punishment of Greek men who run about in the nuddy shouting, “No, I’m Spartacus!” - evils

"I also think that flogging people for cheating would get some higher viewing figgers. Hey it worked for The Passion of the Christ." - matt_ledgerwood

(If Singapore ever hosts the Olympics, they can hire Mel Gibson as the head judicial official. -AL)

"Drugs wouldn't be illegal and there'd be a lot more blood. A lot more. Oh, and no Yanks, although I'm not convinced this was actually a rule, more just a happenstance." - blu_matt

(The only reason we weren't at the ancient Games is we hadn't discovered the Old World yet. -AL)

"the shotput was heavier" - impulsezip

(You know, I've just got to comment on the silver medallist in the shot put, American Adam Nelson. I have never, EVER seen such a scary game face as this guy's:



The photos don't convey the intensity at all. He looked like he wanted to eat the shot put instead of throwing it. -AL)

(Once again, we turn to LJDQ's olympically suspicious camera to study Mr. Nelson in action...



Just as I suspected. Illegal dosing of gamma radiation. HULK DISQUALIFIED! -CV)

"they didn't have calculators and they had to add the scores in their heads or on parchment, so sometimes the numbers were off. Well it's still screwed up, but that's only because they let France judge some of the competitions." - ghostwriterxx

(+1, picking on the French. -AL)

"It would be just a bunch of hunky men with their junk hangin' out." - perkyczarlet
"There would be a bunch of pee-pees and boobies flapping around. And higher ratings because of it." - tiegra
"Many many wangs blowing in the wind. Also, some interesting cases of frostbite... and a greatly hightened interest in women's beach volleyball..." - chrysoberyl
"The players would be all naked. Then the spectators would be fucking, eating and vomiting all over." - deinemuse

Correct Answer: The athletes would be naked.

"NEKKID ATHLETES!!!!!!" - pisica
"NAKEDNESS!! WOO HOO" - _j0k3r_
"ALL NUDE XXX action!!!" - fizrep
"Lots of naked male-on-male action." - krick
"NEKKID OLYMPICS!" - perkyczarlet

(Some of you were a bit too excited about this question. -CV)

3. After Athens, where are the next Olympics Games being held?

"There won't be a next Olympics. In four years, ALL athletes will have been eliminated for drug use." - b7cy

"If anyone gets this without Web cheating, the Winter Olympics probably be held in a newly frozen Hell." - fizrep

(Your faith in your fellow quiztakers is weak. -CV)

"On the side of the tallest mountain in the universe?" - verdandiweaves
"My bed. Oh wait, that's the sex Olympics. Sorry." - notevenu
"my backyard?" - crostfingrs
"my back garden" - seolta
"In my back yard" - spiffington
"My roof garden." - pisica
(I guess we know you all will be sharing a flat in 2006. -AL)
(Everyone take note: party at crostfingrs, seolta, spiffington, and pisica's house, Winter, 2006. BYOB. -CV)
"In Tijuana" - thinksheknowsya
"Cape Breton, Canada" - dougygyro
"Athens" - perkyczarlet

(Ok, fizrep, I concede your point. -CV)

"Iraq." - lizature, krick
"Baghdad." - snigglefritz

(The 2008 Baghdad Olympics will feature the debut of several new track & field events, including the 100-meter Suicide Bomber Dash & Precision Grenade Throwing. -AL)

"Well, since they seem to be having trouble getting enough spectators to fill the stadiums, it would be logical to have the next Olympics in a country which can ‘make sure’ that people actually turn up. This narrow the choices to one of those countries that a) don’t care about human rights, and b) are not ‘friends’ of those countries that supposedly advocate human rights. So let’s see… where to find somewhere where the government herds people to an event at gunpoint? Hey great! THE OLYMPICS ARE COMING TO SYRIA!!!!!!! " - alyaat

(These should be better than the proposed Iraq Olympiads... but not by much. -CV)

(It's good to see a Syrian citizen with such pride in her home country. -AL)

"I voted for 'The Moon'." - doomgirl

(I think that this venue would have the greatest effect on either the pole vault or the three-day equestrian. Moon horses! -AL)

("...and a tragedy at today's Olympic events, as Jamaican Lunar Pole Vaulter Ganja Smokinuppa accidentally propelled himself outside of the lunar gravity well and into deep space. He will receive the first ever posthumous Olympic gold medal." -CV)

Correct Answer: Torino, Italy will host the 2006 Winter Olympiad

"Beijing." - Three of you

(That would be the next Summer Olympiad. But the Winter one will come first, in two years. Tricksy hobbitses, we are! -AL&CV)

"I have no idea. Sports schmorts!" - marasca

(Fair enough. -CV)

4. Which of the following used to be an Olympic sport but is no longer?
a) Ballroom dancing
b) Tug-of-war
c) Dueling
d) Beach volleyball

"Ballroom dancing. But they had to get rid of it because of all the rampant steroid abuse among the dancers." - krick

"Ballroom dancing - but Patrick Swayze brought that to a halt." - verdandiweaves

(He was definitely not strictly ballroom -CV)

"Ballroom Duelling - 'Look, you stupid bastard you've got no arms left!'" - evils

(I don't remember this scene taking place in a ballroom, but +1, Monty Python & the Holy Grail. -AL)

"Those guys wouldn’t be caught dead dancing. 'Oh, you look simply divine in that tunic, Socrates. Wherever did you learn to dance so gracefully?'" - alyaat

"My vote is for tug-of-war, but only if it's between men and a 15 foot tall ape" - fizrep

"I'm thinking tug-of-war, and if I'm wrong, they should make it an Olympic sport and get those guys from the world's strongest man who tow trains and stuff to pull against one-another. Go Magnus Ver Magnusson!" - chrysoberyl

(+1, The World’s Strongest Man. One of the few things on ESPN that I will drop everything to watch. -CV)

"Because the Olympic Games are meant to improved international relations, Tug of War has been replaced with Tug of Peace." - impulsezip

(Hippy. -AL)

"I'd say Dueling...but did they get to use the gloves to smack each other with?" - thinksheknowsya

(Of course. Half of the event’s grading is about the slap. -CV)

"Dueling, too many lightsaber injuries." - matt_ledgerwood

(Also, judges complained about headaches from all the Force mind tricks the competitors used to try to influence scores. -AL)

"Opting for dueling because doesn't someone die when you duel?" - deinemuse

(deinemuse, my poppet. I want you to think over your answer for a moment. Yes, people die in dueling. So do you think this used to be acceptable in the Olympics?! -AL)

"Duelling I imagine. Probably made it safer by bringing in fencing rules, armour and giving a point penalty for running your opponent through." - _j0k3r_

"I don't think ANY of those should be an Olympic sport." - notevenu

(And, fortunately, none of them are. Anymore. -CV)
(Hate to tell you, CV, but beach volleyball is a current Olympic sport. -AL)
(Goddammit. -1 for me! -CV)

"Oh dear... i'm delerious. I just opened this up to input my answers and read that first event as Balloon Wrestling..." - seolta

(This would be after the Balloon Animal Making events. -CV)

"You missed 'Ferret Hurling' from the list. A very popular sport amongst 13th century Yorkshire Olympic finalists, of which there were many, but had to be given up because too many of the creatures were either being carried away by the mascot whippets or badly singed in flight due to unforeseen problems with the smoking of the traditional competitor's pipe." - spiffington

"It's actually e) Cat suffocating, a fabulous sport where the competitors must asphyxiate a batch of 8 healthy active felines using nothing but one's own ample midriff. When performed by an experienced professional, it's an art-form to rival many others." - blu_matt

Correct Answer: b) Tug-Of-War

"It's a little known fact that originally each of the above were actually combined into one formal-dress-with-jute-accesories-battle-to-the-death-in-the-sand EXTRAVAGANZA!!! - It was just too complicated, so they split it up. The rules were more complicated and even sillier than cricket. That and they kept going through steak knives WAY too quickly." - dougygyro

5. Which well-known composer of movie soundtracks also has composed the theme music for three Olympiads?

"Whats an olympiad?" - _j0k3r_

(+1 if and only if you said that with Ralph Wiggum’s voice. -CV)

(I watched _j0k3r_ write his answers in the GIS lab on Wednesday night, & I did not hear any Ralph Wiggum imitating. -AL)

"Elton John. For the torch ceremony, he could just repurpose "Candle in the Wind." Again." - b7cy

"I have no idea... Spielberg? Disney? Dang, I can't even name one composer, much less a famous one." - d4b

(Spielberg: Not a composer. Disney: Currently decomposing. d4b: Knows no composers. You, sir, are fined one hundred pushups for this answer. -CV)

"Rowlf from the Muppets." - evils

(And here I thought Dr. Teeth was always the brains behind that band. -CV)

(A-NI-MAL!!! Had to be said. Best Muppet ever. -AL)

"Kenny Loggins. First name that came to mind, which is really scary." - notevenu

"Damn you. For some reason this question put Queen's "We are the champion's" in my head. Makes me want to put a drill to my temple." - tiegra

(Our job here is done. -CV)

"Edward Lear? Author of the great Quangle Wangle’s hat." - seolta

(And here I thought Button Moon was the height of Britannic gibberish... -CV)

"Dr. Dre" - snigglefritz

(Maybe if New York City wins its bid for the 2012 Summer Games this dream will
become a reality. -AL)

"Crap, what the hell is his name? He did Star Wars and... a bunch of other stuff. Crap crap crappity crap! Well, whoever it is, it should be Danny Elfman. Da Elfman is da bomb." - marasca

(And da marasca gets da -1. -da CV)

"Danny Elfman. The 2006 Winter Canadian Games will be designed by Tim Burton and will be commentated by Johnny Depp and Christina Ricci... in black leather." - dougygyro

(While incorrect, your answer does prompt images of Christina Ricci in black leather. Full credit. -CV)

(The Winter Olympics already have a higher rate of serious injury than the Summer Olympics. With Burton designing the competitions, I think new world records could be acheived in heart attacks & faintings-from-fright. -AL)

Correct Answer: John Williams

6. In which competition did you win your Olympic gold medal?

"The 100-Meter Dash, While Being Chased by a Car. True story: When I was in middle school, my dad used to come home roughly the same time the school bus let me off. If the timing were right, he'd chase me down the driveway in the car. And sometimes into the yard. Good times, good times." - b7cy

(Sometimes the fastest runners in the world are born from the right kind of motivation. -CV)

"Midget tossing" - lizature

(Note to all: lizature is the tosser, not the tossee. -CV)

"Olympic baby tossing." - perkyczarlet

(The precursor to midget tossing. For lightweights. -CV)

(Anyone care to guess what perkyczarlet does for a living? That's right, she's a midwife! -AL)

"There’s an interesting story to that. After the zoo reclaimed their monkey my medal was retracted and the Olympic committee issued a restraining order. My attorney has advised me to comment no further." - tiegra

"I think I held a pushup position the longest of anyone when I was a kid in school." - d4b

(Good thing, too. Your fine is still waiting. -CV)

"I'm not sure, but it definitely involves vodka and nudity." - marasca

(Whatever the sport is, getting the gold medal apparently involves enough vodka to cause memory loss. -AL)

"Putting Things On Top of Other Things. The Ukranian took silver." - crostfingrs

"Pie Eating" - ghostwriterxx

(CV is going to whip your ass in this year's competition, Barbie Doll! -AL)

"I got mine in the 500-meter Strumpet Chase." - fizrep

(Don't quite have the stamina for the 1-km event, do ya? -AL)

((-1 to me, unwarranted harshness. -AL) Warranted. -CV)

"It was the 1997 Sexolympics and I won my gold for best acrobatic move that didn't end in injury to either party." - notevenu

(I was robbed by the Bulgarian judge! -AL, 1997 silver medalist)

"Well I did win a gold medal in extreme tidily winks but I was stripped of it due to drug testing. Framed by the man I tell you framed." - matt_ledgerwood

"I think it would be equestrian and a mix of archery, that way I can shot stuff while I ride. It will be like my own battle. " - deinemuse

(When deinemuse grows up, she wants to be a centaur. -CV)

"1976, the cat suffocating event. I smothered all 8 cats in only 0'27.34". Pretty impressive, huh? I've also got a very nice furry cummerbund as a memento." - blu_matt

"I got a silver in Cat Juggling." - krick

(Was this before or after they were smothered by blu_matt? -CV)

"Best impression of a sleek feline." - verdandiweaves

(I hope you stayed far, far away from blu_matt & krick. -AL)

"When I was in Wisconsin, I competed in Cross-Country Bowling." - impulsezip

(Please tell me this event used 200-ton bowling balls & resulted in the destruction of Oconomowoc. -AL)

"Somersalting, 1904 Quebec Summer Games. You should see the watercolors." - dougygyro

(I couldn't find them, but I did find this lovely acrylic-on-linen painting...



Somehow, you look more orange than I had imagined. -AL)

Correct Answer: "The Hand Jive" - lolafae

"BTW, I can't believe there wasn't a question about the Olympic mascot, Izzy... He was so popular, The Cheat dressed up as him for Halloween..." - krick


Well, everyone, that's it for this week. We announce a 28-way tie for the gold medal! Laurel wreaths all around! As usual, thanks for playing, thanks for pimping LJDQ on your own journals, & a new Quiz will be posted on Monday!

Rock on,

Hans & Ang

Comments

[seolta.livejournal.com]

And here I thought Button Moon was the height of Britannic gibberish...

Just wait, dear Moderators... there is a tonne more to be unveiled for your amusement :)

[angledge.livejournal.com]

Are you threatening us!??

[seolta.livejournal.com]

This most humble LJDQ minion would never dare to threaten such greatness as our benevolent and righteous moderators, Awesome Ang and Heroic Hans. I merely offer my ancestral love of nonsense and eccentricity in tribute.

[marasca.livejournal.com]

Hans is heroic? Oh yeah, I remember that story-- it was when Hans most heroically saved his friends from an onslaught of donuts and chocolate by eating them all himself. ;)

[mshenzi.livejournal.com]

hey marasca, how did you take a hive picture and make it your live journal picture?

[marasca.livejournal.com]

Hi! Is Ang calling everyone this morning and forcing them onto LJ or something?

I downloaded the photo from the Hive site, cropped it in photoshop to 100 x 100 pixels, and then uploaded it (from www.livejournal.com it's called User Pictures under the Manage menu). If you need help cropping, let me know what photo you want and I'd be glad to help.

[mshenzi.livejournal.com]

Actually, nobody called me or forced me to join. I did it all by my little old self...

[marasca.livejournal.com]

Wow, what initiative! ;)

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

I fear to watch... yet cannot turn away!