LJ Daily Answers: 10 April 2012
Apr. 10th, 2012 10:23 amFooled you! You all thought it would be Monday, but instead it's Tuesday! Mwaaaa ha ha haaaah!
...also, I had internet problems. My bad.
1. Fun with lyrics! Name the song and the singer:
Mama, I found a man
Who loves me and understands
Papa, he's quite a man
He adores me, he's my biggest fan
"Don't lyrics like that just make you cringe? It's like a bunny frolicking on the interstate." -
“Lady Mixalot, I got back" -
“'Misery' by Kathy Bates and the Sledgehammers" -
“Mama Said Knock You Out by LL Cool J" -
"'It's Raining Men,' Richard Simmons" -
"Twilight Love by Bella and the Sparkly Vampires of DOOM" -
"The lost 'Quite A Man' verse to 'Triangle Man'." -
"'The Ballad of Bobby Brown' by Whitney Huston. What? Too soon?" -
(Here at the Quiz, it's never too soon. Just ask New Orleans or Steve Irwin. -CV)
"Dr Strangefan, or: How I learned to stop worrying and love the stalker" -
“Love Fool by the Cardigans, which I've never understood as a name for that band. They're not from Cardigan, they don't wear Cardigans and there isn't a Corgi among them." -
“I see a lyric start with 'Mama' and it's immediately Bohemian Rhapsody. These lyrics aren't scanning well to the melody in my head." -
"Sister, I just stole your man.
Now you need a brand new plan.
Brother, he's a WoW fan
And he just joined your clan" -
“Waitasec...you had a chance to do Led Zep's 'Fool in the Rain', or The Who's 'Won't Get Fooled Again', or even Foghat's 'Fool for the City', and what do you do? Dia-Rihanna? Really? Respect...for mods...fading...faaaaddinnnnggg..." -
(CV did it!! I wasn’t involved! An old friend came in from out of town. Someone stole my car. There was an earthquake. A terrible flood. Locusts! IT WASN'T MY FAULT, I SWEAR TO GOD! – LL)
(I did it solely to get a reaction like this one. +1 to me. -CV)
Correct Answer: Rihanna, "Fool In Love"
2. What is the common name for iron pyrite?
“I imagine Cash 4 Gold and similar businesses do a booming trade in Fool's Gold." -
(It's the only legally permitted use of Monopoly Money outside of the board game. -CV)
“It's called fool's gold. As in, I pity the fool who thinks that's gold!" -
(You're a question too early for this joke. -CV)
"Pittsburgh Pyrite" -
(I do pity those fools, however. They're almost as bad as the Cubs. -CV)
"I thought that said 'iron PIRATE' and went, 'Huh. That's a great name for a heavy metal band.'" -
(I'm sure many pirates were put in the Iron Maiden. I guess it's close enough. -CV)
"I am the Pyrite King! It is, it is a foolish thing to be the Pyrite King!" -
"Aye-arrrrrrrn" -
“Adamantium" -
"If Tony Stark and Saint-John Allerdyce had a love child" -
“Fe3.1415926535R" -
"I prefer no-iron pyrite. I'm a lazy slug, I hate ironing" -
"Pecan pie. Seriously, that stuff is hard as rocks" -
"this one never fooled me. It was rubber looking like obsidian that was my downfall. Curse you, vulcanized rubber!" -
Correct Answer: Fool's Gold
3. How does Clubber Lang feel about Rocky Balboa?
“Well, I could explain it at length, but, really, I'm not quite sure it would be appropriate for younger audiences. Let's just say it involves Barry White songs, candles, and a lot of lube." -
"Didn't he sing 'I feel pretty, oh so pretty' or was that another old movie I spaced on while stuck watching with my mother on a Saturday afternoon?" -
(You are so far off course that not even the combined might of GoogleMaps, a Tom-Tom, and Davey Crockett could get you back on track. -CV)
“He'd like to invite him over for tea, and little cucumber sandwiches." -
"With a name like Clubber, I'mma guess that he does not like the guy" -
(Only if the guy happens to be a baby harp seal. -CV)
"Wuv, Twue Wuv" -
(+1, The Princess Bride. -CV)
"He gives me enthusiasms!" -
“Again with the pitying of the fool." -
“It's either sex or violence. Maybe both?" -
"GET SOME NUTS!" -
"My prediction: I'll be doing kid's shows in a few years and having Nancy Reagan sit on my lap." -
"What is this feeling, so sudden and new? Pi-ty! Unadulterated pi-ty" -
"Mr. T sent his condolences to Dave Grohl. He pities the Foo" -
"He has sympathy for Rocky, whom he believes is lacking in good judgment. I mean if you opposed Mr. T, I'd think you were deficient, too." -
"What say, this fool? I do pity him sorely, for doubtless he will soon enter upon a world wherein he shall but hurt!" -
“Are you pitying? Are you pitying? There's no pity in boxing! Mickey Goldmill was my manager and he called me a bum! And that was when my wife came all the way across Philadelphia to see me fight! And did I pity the fool? NO! And do you know why? Because there's no pity in boxing!" -
"
" - Correct Answer: "I don't hate Balboa; I pity the fool."
4. Fun with Shakespeare! Complete this quote:
Shall we their fond pageant see? ___________________
"Now show thee the goods, thou lustful wench!" -
"But if it wouldl be 'Toddlers and Tiaras' I shall pass because verily if they do not get their rhinestone crown then the shit shall hitteth the fan!" -
“To sight the night, with light complete. (fuck, iambic is a bitch to write...)" -
“Nope! Chuck Testa." -
“What fools these Quizlings be" -
"Miss Canada was a dude!" - THALEN
"Wubba-wubba-wubba-whee!" -
"It shall be a midsummer night's dream within a midsummer night's dream." -
"Here she comes, Miss Amerikee! (Hmmm. The image of Bert Parks as Puck is making me dizzy.)" -
"I'm really looking forward to the swimsuit competition." -
“I'm not familiar with that particular quote, but I bet it's much better in the original Klingon" -
(+1, Star Trek VI. -CV)
"Now watch Judi Dench as Titania back in 1968
(Gah! Cannot reconcile... sexy green Judy Dench... with M from James Bond... gggnnnnAAARRRRGHGHGHGG -CV)
Correct Answer: "Lord, what fools these mortals be."
"Today it would be, 'Bitch, assclowns these mortals be!'" -
5. Frank Huntington Stack used what pseudonym when writing the comic "The Adventures of Jesus"?
“Rob Liefeld" -
(I am now imagining Jesus drawn like Cable, and it is AWESOME. Tons of pouches and some huge guns and shoulder pads and everything. -CV)
"Riding a donkey is quite an adventure, yo" -
"Foolio." -
“Biff, Christ's Childhood Friend." -
(+1, Christopher Moore – LL)
"B. I. Ble" -
"I prefer his other work, 'Super Best Friends'" -
(+1, South Park. -CV)
"Vatican 2" -
(...Electric Boogaloo. -CV)
"Is Frank Stack the same guy that hosts Unsolved Mysteries? Didn't he die recently? So the unsolved mystery is what happened to Zombie Jesus?" -
(That was Robert Stack. Zombie Jesus is still a mystery. -CV)
"Rufus. Struck from the list of the apostles AND his gospel was never recognized, can you believe it?" -
(+1, Dogma. -CV)
"Salman Rushdie" -
"Buckaroo Banzai" -
“Sookie Stackhouse. Jesus was a vampire, right? Rose from the dead, told people to drink his blood. BRB going to hell..." -
(Jesus was neither a zombie nor a vampire, he was a lich… - LL)
"
" - (I am totally not ashamed to admit that I would read this based on the cover alone. I mean, look at it. The villain, the supposed Antichrist, is crushing the United Nations (while simultaneously allowing the world community to look up his robes), wearing a tremendously pimping hat and set of bling rings, and wielding an enormous string of rosary beads against Jesus Christ, who himself is sporting a rather buff torso and is backed up by a fighter squadron of doves. Jesus is also accidentally toppling the Empire State Buidling. Satan makes a guest appearance. HOW IS THIS NOT AWESOME? -CV)
Correct Answer: Foolbert Sturgeon
6. Tell us something funny. Anything!
"something funny. Anything!" -
(Nyuk nyuk nyuk. Everyone's a comedian here. -CV)
“People are still voting for Rick 'Let's Ban Porn' Santorum" -
“Real phone call I received last week: 'DUDE! They raised my bail to $100,000!' 'Um, who is this?'" -
“Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one says, 'Hot enough for you?' The second one says, 'OH MY GOD, A TALKING MUFFIN!'" -
“Ask not for whom the bone bones, for it bones for thee." -
“The guy who made that misleading, condescending Kony 2012 video got arrested for running around naked and masturbating. His spokesperson then claimed he was suffering from 'exhaustion, dehydration, and malnutrition.' I think he was just suffering from inebriation and an epidermal deficiency." -
“What is the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef." -
"A liberal, a moderate, and a conservative walk into a bar. The bartender says, 'Hi, Mr. Romney. The usual?'" -
“Two fish are in a tank and one says to the other, 'Do you know how to drive this thing?'" -
"Did you hear about the lawyer who quit taking Viagra because all it did was make him taller?" -
“At the end of a soccer game, one of my teammates was showing the rest of us this huge purple bruise he'd gotten on his inner thigh. One of the guys says, 'Dude! Shoulda used your safeword.'" -
“The bartender says, 'We don't serve faster-than-light particles here'. A neutrino walks into a bar. " -
“As some people may still remember, back in the late 1970s digital radio alarm clocks were all the rage. One day, my grandmother (about 70 years old at the time) and I were talking about Christmas presents, and she casually remarked that she'd love to get a genital alarm clock from me. I don't think she ever quite forgave me for the hysterics I had that day ... -
(I am picturing a genital alarm clock in my head now. The clitoris is definitely NOT the snooze button. -CV)
And there you have it. A quiz full of foolery, but not on April Fools, when we said full because it sounds like fool, and then did fool later, because that's all fooling, and... uh, yeah.
Hope you all had a Happy Easter/Passover/Whatever if you celebrated, and if not, then hope you had a great weekend! And a great upcoming April! Wherein there will be showers! And then Mayflowers! And then Pilgrims! OH NOEZ!
Rock On!
AL&CV&LL
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Date: 2012-04-10 02:51 pm (UTC)I notice every time I do well you first ratchet up the tension for me by stalling the answer post for at least 24 hours. It's like going to commercial before revealing who's won [insert reality show here].
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Date: 2012-04-10 03:42 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2012-04-10 03:20 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 03:43 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 03:38 pm (UTC)Plus, this has been a pleasant diversion while I take a break from working on my Script Frenzy (http://www.scriptfrenzy.org) screenplay...an adaptation of the ST: TOS novel Uhura's Song (http://www.amazon.com/Uhuras-Song-Trek21-Janet-Kagan/dp/0743403738/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1334072204&sr=8-1).
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Date: 2012-04-10 03:47 pm (UTC)(I joke. But it is the first Trek Novel I ever read, like over 25 years ago, no lie. I am very familiar with the story.)
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Date: 2012-04-10 03:51 pm (UTC)Like this:
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Date: 2012-04-10 04:10 pm (UTC)No, I haven't got one.
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Date: 2012-04-10 05:43 pm (UTC)Well, just when I thought I'd seen everything, I stand corrected.
...I can't even think of something to say now. That's just special.
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Date: 2012-04-10 08:32 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 08:48 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 06:17 pm (UTC)Thank you.
Not.
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Date: 2012-04-11 06:18 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 04:18 pm (UTC)(I am now imagining Jesus drawn like Cable, and it is AWESOME. Tons of pouches and some huge guns and shoulder pads and everything. -CV)
Don't forget having muscles that don't exist on the human body, and a neck that's as wide as the head.
“At the end of a soccer game, one of my teammates was showing the rest of us this huge purple bruise he'd gotten on his inner thigh. One of the guys says, 'Dude! Shoulda used your safeword.'" -
My monitor thanks you for the spit-take.
However,
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Date: 2012-04-10 04:57 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 05:42 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 04:58 pm (UTC)It's good to be a fool!
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Date: 2012-04-11 12:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 09:42 pm (UTC)See, you think you're joking, but you're (http://www.againwiththecomics.com/2009/10/rob-liefelds-awesome-maximum-bible.html) not (http://robliefeldcreations.com/?p=2434).
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Date: 2012-04-11 12:34 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-10 09:59 pm (UTC)+1 to neumeindil for making me laugh in #6. Ah politics. It doesn't matter who is running or whatever, someone will always have something funny to say about them.
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Date: 2012-04-11 12:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-11 12:05 am (UTC)I was a kind of surprised my minus-one-bait answer didn't get in there. (Miss Congeniality -1 -MD)
;D
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Date: 2012-04-11 12:26 pm (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2012-04-11 06:21 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-11 12:25 pm (UTC)If you have limited time and you've never been before, you should follow this path and hit up these sights (http://chaosvizier.livejournal.com/246567.html). And the Grand Bazaar if you want extra shopping. It's totally worth it. If you can, have a meal on the bridge that spans the Golden Horn. Good fish restaurants there. Dohlmabace Palace is also awesome; tricky to get in, but worth it.
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Date: 2012-04-12 07:33 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-04-12 01:25 pm (UTC)