LJ Daily Answers: 11 April 2005

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

"I think the theme is "Death" this week, which would be depressing, if not for the fact that my roommate is out of town and it is thus NO PANTS WEEK for me. Nothing can dampen my jubilation." - soimpossible414

"Hmm, a death theme. And next week is tax week! How apropos. Nothing is certain but death, taxes, and ljdq." - chlaal

"I personally would have thought basing this weeks ljdq quiz on the Pope's recent demise as tacky in the extreme." - m31andy

Yup. That's us! As a bonus, Prince Rainier III of Monaco was kind enough to also pass on this week, so we got bonus death! Damn, we're good. Oh, and remember that big tough guy Johnny Cochrane? OWNED. Saul Bellow (famous American novelist, Nobel Prize winner) also died. And don't forget Terri Schiavo. So as you can see, the theme, as Abraham Simpson once said, is "DEEEEEEAAAAAAATH!"



1. Prince Prospero built a "castellated abbey" and retreated there with a thousand friends to protect themselves from what?

"I’m probably the only one who read that as “castrated abbey” right?" - groaty

(Wrong. You have 19 friends who thought like you. And then there was nekoama... -CV)

"I first read that as 'cultivated baby'. Yeah. I have no idea what the fuck that means either." - nekoama

"When I saw this question I thought it said "castellated tabby," and something like this came to mind:

" - linguafranca

"'Castellated'? Like those clicky things? Were they retreating from Flamenco dancers?" - profsparky

(You're thinking of castanets. -AL)

(This week's LJDQ Vocabulary Word is CASTELLATED: Furnished with turrets and battlements in the style of a castle. -AL)

"Prospero sounds like such a bad comic book hero name. 'Woe! The crops are dying and we have no money to pay our debts!' 'Never fear! 'Tis I! Prospero! Bringing... prosperity!' 'Huzzah!'" - amandathegreat

"Prospero? That sounds like type of pasta. So I'm going to say that they was hiding from huge anthropomorphic meatballs." - thisisbullcrap

"1000 friends? Imagine his LJ friend list." - kiffany

"Homophobes and intolerance toward alternative lifestyles. Why else would a Prince run off with a bunch of 'friends'." - ladyisabella

"Lawn gnomes. Have you ever stared at one so long that you started to envision it running across the room and gnawing on your ankles?" - kayepants

"Whatever it was, Prospero's plan didn't work because Zoot kept lighting the grail-shaped beacon." - sskipstress

"Well, "Prospero" sounds like "prosperous," which means wealthy, and "castellated" sounds like "castrated," and "abbey" is like the name of that girl in The Crucible, so my logic says they were hiding from wealthy eunuchs who thought they were witches." - muzzyfeverlint

(And this week's gruyere Award for Logic Renunciation goes to... muzzyfeverlint! -CV)

"If these friends are under the age of fourteen then 'Prospero' is Michael Jackson and they're escaping the District Attorney at Neverland Ranch. Did you know there was a haircut in the UK in the 50s/60s called the DA? Copied from the fashion adopted by many District Attorney's in the USA, it looked remarkably like a ducks arse, which some people claim to this day is what DA stands for. Either way, I've digressed." - jonem

"The only Prospero I know is from "The Tempest." So I'll say...shipwrecked princes and mischievous sprites? I'm an English geek, not a history geek." - soimpossible414

(Apparently not even a good English geek... -CV)

"Wasn't Prospero in that play about being stuck on an island with a crazy hairy guy? If I was him, I'd have built a castle to get away from Robin Williams too." - ccaretta

"Did you have to bring Shakespeare into it?? A plague on BOTH your puddings." - fragbert

(Nope, actually we didn't. But we sure fooled a lot of you into thinking we did. We're tricksy that way. -CV)

"Man, I love that story. Stories where everybody dies at the end are so cool." - delordra

"The Red Tide. He and the guys had it up to HERE with how bitchy Italian women get when they 'have a visitor for a week'." - fizrep

"That pesky Red Death, great guy, terrible at parties." - photograce

"The Red Death, a brighter and more festive version of Black Death." - sasscat

"Dude, though, why is DEATH always Red or Black. Why can't we have the Neon Green Death? Or even better, Smiley-Face Yellow Death! It'd be so much happier to die from!" - ataralas

"Oh frabjous day, the English degree finally comes in useful for something other than collecting dust. They're trying to escape the 'red death'. And see how well they did! Never really appreciated Poe until just this moment, come to think of it." - nightsbeautiful

Correct Answer: The Red Death (from "The Masque of the Red Death" by Edgar Allen Poe)

"Not to be confused with the Read Death, Otherwise Edgar Allan Poe WOULD HAVE WRITTEN THE STORY LIKE THIS." - herodotusjr



2. David Mustaine was briefly with Metallica before forming which band?

"What? With all of them?" - l33tminion

(Yes, all of them. Even Lars. -CV)

"'Mustaine' is kind of a funny name... must stain what? I wonder if he had to pay an extra deposit when renting an apartment." - delordra

"Mustaine... Mustard... Hot-dogs have mustard in them. I'm hungry. See you later." - moreteadk

"Mustaine sounds like mustang, which is a kind of horse. And 'The Black Stallion' is a movie about a killer horse, so therefore, obviously the answer is Black Sabbath." - chlaal

(Umm, which version of The Black Stallion did you see? I definitely missed the Killer Horse subtext in mine... -CV)

"It's The Police, isn't it. It's ALWAYS Sting and The Police" - animagiblender

"The Dave Mustaine Band. Their target audience was particularly clueless Dave Matthews fans." - rokeon

"Anal Discharge and the Sex Monkeys. Now with their hit single 'Kill The Bouncer And Feel Up The Bartender'. Oddly, not a popular song to play in the clubs." - lots42

"OMG What's With The Beard, Do You Hide Under Bridges Or Something?" - grapefruitzzz

(I suspect you're thinking of ZZ Top. -AL)

"WYLD STALLYNS!" - fizrep, ellenneithernor

(+1, Bill and Ted's Excellent Adventure. -CV)

"Timmy and the Lords of the Underworld." - flawed_karma

(+1, South Park. -CV)

"It must be a band with Death in the title. Sadly, my musical taste doesn't run darker than than the Care Bears Song, so you're possibly asking the wrong person." - jonem

"'NAPSTER RULEZ' with hits including 'Metallica are Cheap Bastards' and 'Napster Didn't Buy Me Off, I Swear'." - jelymo

"I was not a part of that musical generation, except to be yelling 'TURN THAT SHIT DOWN!'" - csflick

"Originally, they were called Megacake, but no one took them seriously as a metal band. So, they had a meeting to determine whether they wanted Cake or Death." - badgerbabe

"Someday there will be a Jeopardy ep devoted entirely to my childhood: 'I'll take 'Unsubtle References to Genocide for the Purposes of Seeming More Metal' for $800, Alex.'" - 3jane

"The first rule I learnt when I was introduced to metal is that you can't like both Metallica and Megadeath. Yeah, I rage against the system man." - limegreen_sloth

"It was originally called 'We don't have Lars Ulrich and we're still not as popular as Metallica.' But they shortened it to 'Megadeth.' I think the longer title would have been more flattering." - theworryrock

"Megadeth, which was also known in some circles as 'Dave Mustaine's failed attempt to both outdo Metallica and find a suitable vehicle for his ego.' Looks like Dave's still 0 for 2." - fragbert

"Hmm, probably one of those crappy hair metal bands from the 80s. I don't know what's worse, men with big poofy poodle hair, or mullets. Then again, since big poofy poodle hair went with tiger-striped leggings (on men!) and other scary shit, I'm going for the poodle hair. Also, my final answer is Megadeath. Or Megadeth, as spelling words wrong was hip even in the 80s. Bastards." - dracothelizard

"Megadeth! *throws up horns, sticks out tongue, and headbangs, as is protocol in this circumstance. What? Just 'cause it's metal means that there can't be protocol?*" - herodotusjr

(If Penny Arcade says it's good protocol, then it's good protocol. -CV)

Correct Answer: Megadeth

"What? No music question about Rob Zombie?" - pocketmouse

(Sorry, the theme is death, not undeath. Better luck next time. -CV)



3. Which film features the line "'Til death do us part! Well, you girls are dead. And I'm parting"?

"I couldn't think of anything witty or remotely correct for this one, so I will just sit here and feel like a dork. Actually, that's not any different from how I feel normally, so I guess everything is peachy!" - danicia

"When good Lesbian Marriages go horribly bad: Homicidal Exes at the Reception" - vlvtjones

"Totally sounds like something Aragorn would say to the Elves during the battle at Helm's Deep." - comingtoterms

"Steel Magnolias, Director's Cut, in which the ladies get really stoned on Shelby's grave, and Oiser and Claree consumate their lesbian romance in mad old-lady fashion against the creepy southern headstones." - 3jane

"SpiceWorld. What, the Spice Girls weren't dead from the shame of it? I would have been." - prettypinkkitty

"Gotta be 'Heathers.' Actually, I don't remember that line in that movie, but when in doubt, if a GenXer asks you a movie question involving girls and death, you guess 'Heathers.'" - chlaal

(AL, are we GenXers? -CV)

(Let's ask the dictionary again. Generation X: " The generation following the post-World War II baby boom, especially people born in the United States and Canada from the early 1960s to the late 1970s." So, yes. Yes we are. -AL)

"Romeo and Juliet: A Ghetto Interpretation" - polaris_starz

(I believe that film was called West Side Story. -CV)

"I love that movie! Kirstie Alley should be killed more often, I think." - drewbeartx

(Ummmm... which movie are you thinking of? -CV)

"'Til death do us part' is a wedding vow, but he said 'you girls'. OMGPOLYGAMY. Next thing I'll know, the speaker will also be female and/or one of the girls is a box turtle! Because everyone knows that gay marriage leads to polygamy. And a man fucking a box turtle. That's right. A box turtle." - nekoama

(And nekoama's Secret Identity is finally revealed. Everyone, say hello to Senator Rick Santorum of Pennsylvania! For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about, go here. -AL)

"I like my Bruce Willis buff and bald. And not flaaaaaacid." - doomgirl

"Oddly enough, this was the movie that started me considering becoming a mortitian. Interesting job, good money, dead bodies, what's not to like?" - lyzz13

"Stab in the dark #332 - Death becomes her" - caseypuffy

(Swing and a hit! -AL)

"Death Comes in Her, porn for necrophiliacs. After all, if you're a necrophiliac you never have to say.. well, anything really." - eridanusus

(Swing and a GOOD GOD WHAT KIND OF ANSWER IS THAT? -AL)

"'Death Becomes Her' in which the Grim Reaper has a sex change and fulfills his dream of being a woman. Makes a nice girl too. Just check out her appearance in the Sandman comics." - ladyisabella

"Is this 'Death Becomes Her?' 'Cause if it is, it is now time for me to cower in fear from Bruce Willis' stupid little mustache. Forget giant gaping holes in Goldie Hawn's chest, that mustache is the stuff nightmares are made on." - herodotusjr

"It’s funny because Bruce Willis plays the world’s biggest goober in it. He was such a wuss. Seriously." - kokopellinelli

"Goldie Hawn has never looked better. Or even good, really." - phoebesmum

Correct Answer: Death Becomes Her

"In Soviet Russia, Death Becomes YOU!" - ataralas

(Goddammit. -CV)



4. In which tragic but selling tale will you find the Loman family- Willy, Linda, Biff, and Happy?

"That reminds me of the books I learnt to read at school on. They were all these stories about Biff, Chip and Kipper, and sometimes their dog Floppy. They found magic keys and time-travelled and all sorts. I really liked those stories!" - lizzyrose89

"“Old Yeller.” I’ve never seen that movie, I refuse, because of the dog dying. I wouldn’t be able to handle it, really. Though I have seen the sequel, “Son of Old Yeller,” or something like that, and the part that sticks in my mind is when the boy (late teens) says he’ll make dinner, and then his smarmy little girlfriend is like, “No, Travis. That’s women’s work!” and everyone’s like “Wee!” and they all go pop out a few babies. Like ew." - kokopellinelli

"Happy was the bitch, wasn't he?" - fizrep

"not to be confused with Free Willy." - principia_coh

"I read that as 'the Loman family willy' and wondered why they collectively only had one." - mariemuffin17

(Now that is a tragedy... -CV)

"When Linda is the most common name in your family, you know there are problems." - portkey

"A Trailer Park Saga, in which Biff and Happy are eaten by a grue." - jyuu_chan

(I don't even remember what a grue is, but this answer just SOUNDS funny. Grue, grue, grue!! -AL)

(Poor AL, too young to remember the glory days of Infocom's fine Zork Adventures. Fortunately, I'm ancient, and I do remember. +1 for being old school. -CV)

"Tragic? Excuse me? What kind of tragic tale has characters called Happy and Biff in it? Sounds like the mods are screwing with our minds again..." - evilstorm

(Well, duh. -AL&CV)

"I bet it was tragic because Biff and Happy killed their parents for giving them such stupid names. I mean, jeez, the only guy I've ever known named Happy was a hamster." - obviousfakename

"hey linda get down and biff my willy to make me happy.... i cant believe i just wrote that" - spam_with_wings

(What I can't believe is that eridanusus wrote EXACTLY THE SAME THING. Oh, and here's your buddy sarcastro with his thoughts on the subject... -CV)

"something to do with Linda getting Happy when she sees Biff's Willy?" - sarcastro

"Biff Loman? Why not Roman Loman? When he got angry, he could be Foamin' Roman Loman!" - kenshardik

"Snow White and Seven Dead Salesmen" - feste

"Lomans, meet the Lomans, they're the modern Miller family... from the town of Brooklyn, they're a page right outta angst-or-y..." - cpip

"I don't like that play one bit. Boohoo, old guy who's cheating on his wife and is really just an ex-jock with a crummy job. If I want an ex-jock who has a crappy job, I'll watch Married With Children." - dracothelizard

"Death of a Salesman was such a boring play. They should've gotten that man a livejournal. I can see it now. 'Day 9785.' 'Life still tragic. Family still hateful. Sons still stupid. Job sucks. Life sucks. Everything sucks. OH WORLD. WHY DO YOU NO LISTEN WHEN I ANGST LIKE WOE? I'm going to go and cut myself before spamming a random comunity in hopes for attention. WOE.'" - nekoama

"'The Most Brain-numbing 5 Weeks My Crappy English Teacher Ever Dragged Us Through'. Man, that woman really knew how to suck every last bit of fun out of education." - psychoticspy

"Death of a Tattoo Artist: this play's protagonist covers his entire body with tattoos of his animal totem (the wombat). But after inking his genitalia, "Willy" develops an unfortunate infection with dire consequences. In the stirring final scene, he meets his demise: victim to the totem on the Lo-man pole." - gossamer_gull

(A tragic tale of punnery, body art, and wombats. +1 for creative punnery. -CV)

Correct Answer: "Death of a Salesman", by Arthur Miller



5. What was the name of the Greek deity who was the personification of Death?

"Oh, so you've already met my ex wife. Wait, you said 'deity' not 'filthy whore'." - thisisbullcrap

"Immareapyoursoulikos" - dirtynumbangel

"Deathadopolos!" - gossamer_gull

"Louis Mandylor?" - calico321

"Mickey Rourke." - Rick Toenjes

(He did do a lot of killing there, true. -CV)

"afro-deity, he was the baddest motherfcker in all the land" - spam_with_wings

"I didn't even *have* the Salmon Mousse..." - jonem

(+1, Monty Python's Meaning Of Life. -CV)

"Hades! Oh, no, he was the ruler of the Underworld, not Death itself. But he had a really cute dog, if that counts." - lizzyrose89

(Nope. Might have counted if you named the dog, but... well, no. Still doesn't count. -CV)

"Charon was the guy with the black cloak and the scythe. I can't remember whether it was supposed to be pronounced like "Karen" or "Chair-on", but I'm leaning towards "Chair-on". Someday I want to get a black cat and name it Charon, then order it to take people to the underworld." - delordra

"Hades, who is sooo my favorite Disney character of all time!" - muzzyfeverlint

(You did NOT just say that. -CV)

"Well Persephone's the Queen of the Dead and Hades is Lord of the Underworld... so this is a trick question, right?" - technoinfidel

(In more ways than one... -CV)

"I much prefer Bacchus, Lets drink, procreate, and do it with style!" - csflick

"Apparently, all that Xena did nothing for my knowledge of Greek deities." - badgerbabe

(Relying on Xena for mythological knowledge might actually be worse than relying on Disney. -CV)

"Azrael? No, that was the angel" - psychoticspy

"Cleopatra...she was a bitch. And people seemed to die a lot when they dealt with her." - jazzbaby74

"Thanatos is like Xanatos from Disney's Gargoyles. And Jonathan Frakes looks almost exactly like Xanatos. So live long and prosper, then." - profsparky

"Thanatos. Freud had a big thing for both Eros and Thanatos. I'm convinced that he was into necrophilia... and cocaine." - dark_goddess_

"Wait, it's not Thanatos, is it? If it is, I'll have to admit I learned something from reading a Piers Anthony novel (On a Pale Horse, since you asked), and then whichever deity is responsible for protecting the world from really crappy fantasy novels will come and eat me. Shit, I bet it is Thanatos." - elsajeni

Correct Answer: Thanatos



6. If you gotta go, what do you want on your tombstone?

"Pepperoni (Boy, I'm sure you didn't get a hundred of THAT answer.)" - thisisbullcrap

(Oh, it was probably more than one hundred. -1 to each of you for wimping out with the eeeeeasy joke about pizza toppings. -AL)

"You know, I've always wondered how people know on LJ if you've died. What if I got hit by a car tomorrow? Nobody would think to let my flist know!" - lizzyrose89

"Did good. Partied hard." - marasca

"Here lies an atheist - all dressed up and nowhere to go." - kiffany

"Angsty emo lyrics. Maybe I could get Evanescence to play." - puredeadthingy

(+1, theme-appropriate LJ name. -AL)

"3jane, 1978-2005
I used to fear the zombies.
Not anymore.
See you next Tuesday." - 3jane

(You said "Tuesday" because you're going to rise from the grave to do the Quiz! Good Quizling! -AL)

"Beloved daughter, loyal friend, Massachusetts driver." - aki

"For the last time I'M NOT A HYPOCHONDRIAC!!!" - m31andy

(So you'll be right, but dead. Sort of a Pyrrhic victory. -AL)

"No tombstone for me, I'm getting cremated. But, unlike my grandmother and uncle, I don't want the ashes to be buried after I'm cremated. That's just creepy and weird. Though not as creepy and weird as my grandfather's half of the tombstone. It has his name and '1924-' and then a blank, like it's just waiting until the time when the grave can reach up its ichory fingers of death and suck him down into it." - delorda

"Died Tragically Rescuing His Family From The Remains Of A Destroyed Sinking Battleship" - rikchik, kayepants, mcclintock

(+1, The Royal Tenenbaums. -AL)

"Wish you were here." - whiski_sour

"Here a dead man lies,
Gently under verdant grass...
Killed by rabid panda." - jonem

"Etch a sketch, I mean people can mourn and have fun while doing it." - neilx

"Beloved Lunatic" - peithecelt

"Please recycle." - sestree

(At that point, you're practically biodegradable... -CV)

"This is what happens when you spray an electrical socket with a high-powered hose." - invalidcaracter

"I did read on a tombstone once: 'Here lies the body of Thomas Drake, who stepped on the gas instead of the brake.' so there's an option if I die in a car crash... but I'd have to change my last name so it rhymes with brake. and that could be complicated." - allieg

"Information relating to this product can be found on leaflet 227 or at www.caseydied.com.au/bio" - caseybuffy

"Hi, this is Kelly. I'm not able to drag myself out of the grave right now, but if you leave a message and a blood sacrifice after the tone, I'll get back to haunting the person of your choice as soon as I can." - limegreen_sloth

(Profiting from your own death! Very creative. -AL)

"brb" - linguafranca, eridanusus

"MY DED IS PASTEDE ON YAY" - amzrigh

"Lying beneath fresh soil and clover,
We really hope her sleepwalking's over." - jelymo

"Next time, choose cake." - phoebesmum

"This person is no more. She has ceased to be. She's expired and gone to meet her maker. She's a stiff. Bereft of life, she rests in peace. She's pushing up the daisies. Her metabolic processes are now history. She's off the twig. She's kicked the bucket, she's shuffled off her mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible. This is an ex-human." - lilitou, technoinfidel

(+1, Monty Python. -AL)

"Tombstone pfft. I'd rather be cremated. Wheeeeeee FIRE. Mmmmm fire. Even in death, we do not part." - yueni

"Nothing. I want to be set to sea in a flaming raft. WHEEEEEEE!" - ataralas

(That's my plan too! To foil grave robbers! But I want something more "Viking warship" than "raft". -AL)



And that brings us to the conclusion of this week's Quiz. I hope we didn't mortally offend any of you by making jokes about Death, but believe me, it could have been much worse.

New Quiz tomorrow! Until then ...

Rock on,

AL&CV

Comments

[bubosquared.livejournal.com]

Well, he's 21, so this is a long way off (... I hope), but actually, that's a good point. Should bring that up.