ljdq | LJ Daily Answers: 25 May 2009

chaosvizier.livejournal.com posting in

1. What investment bank was sold to JPMorgan Chase in March, 2008?

"What the heck is this? I'm here for fart jokes and sting references. Not current events. Get your ass back to Jeopardy." -

tarpo

"The Sperm Bank! Now THAT'S an investment in the future!" -

mattwolf

"It's all the same, only the names have changed" -

darthparadox

(+1, Bon Jovi. See? Fun with lyrics is fun! -CV)

"I hear it was traded for an evolved Mew and a level 35 Magikarp. Even in a global financial crisis, you can still bank on Pokemon." -

mujubius

(I remember when the hot currency was Mox. Ah, the good old days... -CV)

"What bank wasn't sold to Chase?? I think I really shouldn't have to pay back my student loan, considering the people I borrowed the money from don't actually exist anymore." -

angelprojekt

"The Monopoly bank. Everyone knows J.P. Morgan is the Monopoly guy." -

alkion04

"With banks the way they are lately, they'll be a different company in three weeks anyway. Went to my ATM yesterday and there was a pizza place, they got real uppity when I tried to 'withdraw' money." -

killabee886

"JPMorgan Chase sounds like a racehorse. Except it'd be longer, like JPMorgan Investment Banking Chase The Third (by Justin Morgan out of Money)." -

kuzujuk

"

" -

ntlespino

"In the end, JPMorgan Chase was sold to itself. What a twist!" -

napier

(Also, for the record, WaMu was sold in September. -CV)

"Now it's MacJPCokeMorganSternSoftSonyIlluminati. Goddamn Elders of Zion, fuckin' shit up for everybody again." -

thepikey

Correct Answer: Bear Stearns

2. What television character was loosely based on the life of James Capen Adams?

"Cousin It. Dude, buy a fucking razor or something." -

digitalraven,

limegreenjillo

"Alf" -

stealthpup

"Batman, the Capen Crusader!" -

adalger

"Fozzie Bear" -

darthparadox,

etcet

"Captain...CAAAAAAAVEMAAAAEAEAEAEAAAAAAAAN!!!!" -

mattwolf

"Captain James Grizzly Kirk" -

bloodyjohnvane

"The Addams Family" - 9 of you

"BJ and the Bear! (Huh huh, I said 'BJ')" -

thepikey

"Patch Adams. He's the reason I became a doctor." -

many_from_one

" Just because you live in the woods doesn't mean you have to go full-on native. -CV

" -

jigawattica

"Mythbusters! Adams set off to live in the woods and study the excretory habits of the wildlife to prove once and for all if bears really do shit in the woods." -

drunken_hedghog

"Grizzly Adams. Didn't that guy who played him on TV turn into a real crackhead or something? See what happens when you hang out with bears in the woods all day?" -

ginalin

Correct Answer: "Grizzly" Adams

3. In the films "Superman" and "Superman II", who was the villainess "whose perversions and unreasoning hatred of all mankind has threatened even the children of the planet Krypton"?

"I knew I should've let my husband watch Superman last night." -

limegreenjillo

"Ann Coulter" - 17

"Sarah Palin:
Yowza. -CV

" -

demon_666 and 8 others

(This picture is disturbing on multiple levels. -CV)

"Cruella DeVille" -

la_trombonista,

kagomeshuko,

many_from_one

(She was more of a threat to planet Pupulon. -CV)

"Goldilocks.... it makes sense if you look at the bigger picture.." -

jkabley

"I wanna say Ursula, but I think she's the water witch from Disney." -

majorsamfan

"That would be Ursula, the rejected Mankind-Hater Carebear:
I hope she takes out those stupid Gummi Bears next. Bouncing here and there and everywhere, my ass. -CV

I hope she takes out those stupid Gummi Bears next. Bouncing here and there and everywhere, my ass. -CV

" -

jigawattica

"Octomom. She was just angry that none of the Krypton children resulted in a TV show on TLC." -

its_what_we_are

" I forget the name of Superman's cat. Superpussy? Katzenjammer? Something. -CV

" -

germankitty

"The Wicked Witch of West Krypton" -

yayworthy

"Can't remember her name, but I'm sure she kneeled before Zod at some point." -

david_deacon

"Elvira, Mistress of the Night" -

thefannishwaldo

"Dolores Umbridge" -

theylovetostare

"Kathie Lee Gifford" -

piney61

"Crimin-El." -

i_calql8

"Guess her name must have been Kan-Di, and all the little boys wanted some." -

stealthpup

"I didn't know my mother was in the Superman movies!" -

actuallyspatula,

bloodyjohnvane

"and yet she seemed to get along fine with General Zod! Curioser and curioser!" -

blindgeoff

(Zod was mad pimpin'. -CV)

"The girl who Superman said he'd call...but then 'forgot'." -

operatic_diva

"Confession time: I wanted to be Ursa when I grew up. Alas, it was not to be. I can only muster slight contrariness and irritated contempt for all mankind, and my threat to children does not extend beyond Earth. This is what happens when you lower your standards. Stay in school, kids!" -

barbarienne

Correct Answer: Ursa

4. Wrigley Field is the home ballpark for which sports team?

"The Doublemint Twins" - 11 of you
"Their uniforms are silver foil and mint-scented" -

puredeadthingy

"In a sane world, Wrigley Field would house the Minnesota Twins." -

adalger and 4 others

"Jake and Elwood Blues" -

jkabley,

alivicwil,

operatic_diva,

i_calql8

(+1, The Blues Brothers. -CV)

"The Hungry Caterpillars" -

kuzujuk,

jechocochan

"The ivy on the walls can gum up the game. If a ball sticks in there, they'll call it a ground rule doublemint." -

darthparadox

"I'm always excited by a sports question, then I have a hope at guessing the theme. I have now won more things than the Cubs. And I have won nothing." -

lady_lilith

"The Cubs who pioneered using sucking at baseball as a form of art. However, the Washington Natinals are on the verge of perfecting it." -

piney61

"The answer is either the Chicago Bears or the Chicago Cubs. Which one is the baseball team?" -

rhitsqueaky
"Da Cubs" -

ginalin,

barbarienne,

angelprojekt
"Da Bears" -

ifeedformula,

soberloki

"Wrigley-->Gum-->Gummy Bears-->Bear Cubs-->Chicago Cubs. I thought through that entire line of thought as a joke... and then I went, 'Hey, wait a minute... that's the right answer!'" -

alkion04

(And the

ljdq Vulcan Science Academy Award for Logic this week goes to...

alkion04! -CV)

"Chicago Clubs, called such for what they are hit with when they lose a game" -

seferin

(Easier than baby seals... but not as much fun. -CV)

"Oddly enough, I am engaged in making a goat pinata this week. Filling it with mini-booze bottles too. Mmmm." -

thepikey

Correct Answer: The Chicago Cubs

5. Mizar and Alcor can be found in which constellation?

"I could have sworn you said 'constipation'..." -

loopyuk

(Well, they are large balls of flaming gas... -CV)

"Mizar and Alcor? Oh, you just can't get those two out of the sauna!" -

thepikey

"This is Ground Control to Ursa Major, you've really made the grade..." -

kristinmachina

"they sound like evil high priests in a bad fantasy novel. 'Mizar and Alcor have betrayed us, my lord!'" -

kuzujuk

(On the subject of fantasy novels, it was FALKOR, not Alcor. -CV)

"Cool names, but they're not as cool as Betelgeuse. That literally translates from the Arabic as 'armpit of the great one.' I learned that just recently at the planetarium." -

alkion04

"-An obscure constellation in the S-K system, your Majesty. The inhabitants refer to it as the constellation... 'Ursa major'.
- How peaceful it looks." -

jhirat_dai

(+2, Flash Gordon. Well-done. -CV)

"Down in the dumps? Take Alcor, and you'll be reaching for the stars! Use only as directed." -

darthparadox

"You know what they call an astronomer who can't stop observing Ursa? An Alcorholic. Then they ask him to stop being so Mizarly with the telescope time." -

spatialrift47

"Y'know, Mizar comes from the arabic for 'girdle'. But what strange bastards would try to girdle a big fucking bear?" -

digitalraven

(Maybe the bear was embarassed by his fat gut and wanted to look slimmer for the she-bears, rawr. -CV)

"Take a left at the North Star, carry on for 211 light years, then they’re the second and third stars on your right." -

yayworthy

" Look! It's educational! -CV

" -

germankitty

"Many a night would my father wake us up out of our warm beds and drag us out to look through the telescope. He wouldn't let us turn on any lights either to "preserve our night vision". I still hate Venus, Mars, the moon, and Ursa Major for ruining my childhood sleep." -

mathnerd

Correct Answer: Ursa Major, The Great Bear (aka The Big Dipper)

6. Time to bare your soul! Tell us something about yourself.

"I don't bare my soul. I used to bare myself, but the cops said I have to stop." -

operatic_diva

"I used to be in a cult. TRufax. Now I help get people out of them." -

ginalin

"I'm terrified of flying kites. They give me the willies." -

raphsody606

"I never get the theme of the LJDQ. This week was no exception. I'm so ashamed..." -

coloursofdusk

(Don't worry; you're not alone. -CV)

"I am afraid of palm trees. I wish I were kidding. I thought I was safe living in the northeast, but then I found palm trees in southwest Wales. WTF!?!?" -

illogicalvulcan

"I'm getting married soon! ...No joke here, just happy." -

darthparadox

(Congratulations, and good luck! -CV)

"I forgot to take my meds today." -

majorsamfan

"Im newly single.. HEY LADIES! I'm Available!" -

tarpo
"I'm 21 and I still haven't ever been on a date. (Any volunteers, guys?)" -

alkion04

(Well, I'm thinking "match made in heaven", right here. You can thank me later. -CV)

"I was once walking home after a party, wasted out of my mind and pretending to hitchhike. The police pulled over and requested I get into the back of their car. I thought I was being arrested but they actually dropped me off at my flat and told my flatmate to make sure I didn't try and walk home in that state again. I apparently thanked them by throwing up near to, but not on, their shoes. I remember nothing of this but my flatmate had a note from the police to prove it." -

drunken_hedghog

"When I'm stuck in a meeting and trying not to fall asleep, I often write out the Fibonacci sequence on the margins of my notepad." -

packbat

"I have what is known as 'mixed astigmatism'. It means I'm nearsighted in one eye and farsighted in the other." -

ifeedformula

"I like pina coladas.. and taking walks in the rain" -

chickybee32

"I once shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die." -

many_from_one

(Was he a sheriff? Did you or did you not shoot the deputy? -CV)

"I have a CD in the car that I have labled 'Slayer' which actually has Barry Manilow's Greatest Hits on it... oh the shame." -

jkabley

"I had a vasectomy recently. I'd heard that they did it under a general anaesthetic, but the doctor said it was just bollocks." -

jhirat_dai

"I have a pi necklace. It’s the best thing in the history of ever.
Remember, kids, a necklace with length L will make a circle with a radius of L/(2*pi). And now you know. -CV

Remember, kids, a necklace with length L will make a circle with a radius of L/(2*pi). And now you know. -CV

" -

yayworthy

"i almost died when i was two cause I was a stupid kid and decided to snack on an electrical cord" -

jigawattica

(Proving once again that "OM NOM NOM NOM" isn't always the right answer. -CV)

"When I was four, I pulled my pants down in the middle of a crowded grocery store and yelled out, 'My penis is big!' Oh, how naive I was." -

napier

And that's the way it is. The theme this week was bears, not for any good reason, although it's a good followup to bulls, when you look at the stock market and bulls and bears and... yeah, whatever, that's such bullshit. I mean bearshit. The point is, friggin' bears.

Thanks to everyone who played, especially those who tried it out for the first time. Welcome aboard! Tell your friends about us! We hope you enjoyed, and we hope you come back tomorrow for more. Yes, MORE! There's always more. But not always s'more, because I'm out of marshmallow.

Rock On!

AL&CV&LL&TL