ljdq | Live Journal Daily Answers, 7 January 2005

Happy Friday, my dear Quizlings. It looks like I'm running the asylum by myself this week, as

chaosvizier has not had an opportunity to grade your quizzes while working in Mauritius, &

fizrep is presently AWOL, earning him a -50 on the next quiz he plays.

Most of you astutely discerned that this week's theme was the word "middle".

1. Reflecting the historical notion that their nation was the central island of civilization in an ocean of barbarians, what is the Chinese name for China?

"You know, for the nation that brought us gunpowder and fireworks, two favored American standards of those who are red of neck, the pot shouldn't really be calling the kettle a 'barbarian', here, if you ask me..." -

seidoo_ryuu

"CICOB! (the Central Island of Civilization in an Ocean of Barbarians!)" -

theworryrock

"I say the answer translates into something like 'Center of the Universe' or 'Delicious Pork Center Of Which Everyone Else is the Bland Rice Bun.' Because there's nothing better than pork buns. Nothing." -

trishalynn

"We're-All-That-And-A-Bag-of-Fried-Noodles land" -

wyldirishtric

"Uh...China? Wait, that's not it? What do you mean every other nation on Earth doesn't speak American?!? Savages! (just trying to get back into the mindset before I venture back into Central PA)" -

ciara_belle

(Eat some venison, clean your guns, & buy a case of Iron City beer & then you'll be ready.

b7cy can provide further cultural tips if needed. -AL)

"Loosely translated, it's something like 'We're the middle kingdom. We're better than you. We built a wall. Ha! Take that, barbarian hordes!' Of course, then Hadrian stole their idea." -

cloakedstoat

"Oh! It's that sci-fi book series with all the torture! And they live on a world made of ice. Those books sucked. Anyway, it means 'Middle Kingdom.'" -

afterwards

"If the Chinese don't call China China, why do we call China China?" -

turgidnothings

(Because we can't pronounce ...)

Correct Answer: Zhongguo, or the Middle Kingdom.

"Can't answer the question, so I'll spout a random piece of trivia about China that I know. In ancient Chinese times, there was an emperor in the Han dynasty named, I think, Ai. He had a male lover, and, one day, they'd fallen asleep together, only the emperor had to get up to go to court, but his lover was laying on one of his sleeves. Rather than awaken his lover, the emperor chose to cut his sleeve and arrive in court that way. To celebrate their love (and probably suck up a little), the courtiers began to cut their sleeves as well for court. Therefore, one of the names for male homosexuality in China is (or, at least, was) the cut sleeve." -

twilight_angel

(That's a piece of trivia I did not know. Who knows, it may show up in a future Quiz. -AL)

2. What is the name of the TV sitcom that follows the family adventures of Lois, Hal, Francis, Reese, Dewey, and ... the other brother?

"Who in the hell names their kid Dewey? Why in the world would you name your kid after a duck and a decimal system?" -

whiski_sour

"There is a television family that named their kid 'The Other Brother?' My parents told me that was a unique family name!" -

bunnyfer

"The show is named after 'the other brother', isn't it? What a clever way to keep us in the dark!" -

portkey

(You have correctly spotted my Machiavellian plan. -AL)

"DuckTales. No wait, that was Huey, Dewey, and Louie. Never mind." -

seidoo_ryuu

(You must match all of the brothers to receive full credit. -AL)

"I have no wisearse answers. I don't even have the notion to search for fanfic about it. There has to be. Some has got to be writing Mary Sues about Reese or Malcolm." -

temima

(I'm fairly certain that I can guess from context what a "Mary Sue" fanfic might be, but I'm afraid that I really don't want to know. -AL)

"In my household it's called, 'They cancelled Futurama for this drek?'" -

mcclintock

"I've seen that show a grand total of like five times. Which is actually a lot, considering I'm too lazy to keep up with television. Takes a special kind of lazy to manage THAT." -

shinga

"Monkey in the Middle" -

uninhibitedmuse

(Oohhh ... so close. -AL)

"Malcolm X in the Middle. Chronicling the early years of the black revolutionary as he was raised by white foster parents." -

jacesan

(And

sskipstress is in a limerick mood for her answers this week:)

"Lois goes off just to diddle.
And Dewey's a great one to piddle.
Hal, Francis, and Reese,
Always breaking the peace,
To blame it on 'Malcolm in the Middle.'" -

sskipstress

(+1, poetry. I like to reward the extra effort in take to frame answers with rhyme & meter. -AL)

Correct Answer: Malcolm in the Middle.

"I saw an episode recently and I realized that every generation of TV viewers has its 'precocious smart kid in a family of idiots' character. Malcolm's for the Aughts, I think Kevin from the Wonder Years was the '90s, and I'm picking either Lisa Simpson, that Vicki chick from Small Wonder or Carol Seaver for the '80s. The entire cast of 'Head of the Class' doesn't count because they were all precocious smart kids. But the further back you go, the choices start getting harder. Like who would you pick for the '50s? Beaver Cleaver? I don't think so." -

trishalynn

"there are two other brothers..the other is Jamie!" -

theworryrock

(Several of you pointed this out. Since I have never seen the show, I trust that you're all correct. -AL)

3. Answer one or both parts:

(First we'll go over the general complaining. -AL)

"Again with the sports questions. Football causes cancer, okay?" -

silent_r_infork

(I have to ask questions about something, goddammit. And I prefer to ask questions to which I know the answers. One of the things I know a lot of trivia about is American football, so guess what? We're gonna have football questions. Especially now that it's playoff time. GO EAGLES! -AL)

"let me take this moment to add: GO STEELERS!" -

ciara_belle

(-10,000! And there are no other moderators around to stop me! MWAHAHAHAHA! -AL)

"Look. I'm on here at 10.30 at night, the night before I have to go back into work, answering questions on the Internet for a bunch of people I don't know when I could be out drinking or dating or doing any other number of things that people with a social life have. Does this crowd really strike you as the sort that would watch sports?" -

princesskraehe

(I run an online Internet quiz for a bunch of people I don't know, & yet I'm totally into sports. On the other hand, I don't play computer games. Stereotypes sure can be imperfect! -AL)

"I'm a New Zealander, dammit. Our national sport is ~~rugby~~ ~~dwarf-tossing~~ rugby." -

sasscat

(When CV & I first started doing the Quiz, I was living in Scotland. So I felt kinda obligated to make the Quiz Scottish-friendly for the benefit of my friends over there who wanted to play. But now, we apparently have Quizlings on four continents (!!!), so we're either going to have to become even more multicultural, or just fall back on being unabashedly American-centric. -AL)

a) In American football, which position (played by such greats as Dick Butkus, Ray Nitschke, and Jack Lambert) is responsible for stopping the run up the center and helping to close side gaps?

"I always use clear nail polish myself." -

binderbright

(Different kind of run. -AL)

"The only thing I know about football is that the players look nice in tight pants." -

ccaretta

"Midflyhalfflankquartershortstop" -

limegreen_sloth

(All those terms run together, & none of it is correct. -AL)

"... Uh, so... given my ignorance in sports, I'd like you to know the first thought that popped in my head when you asked about position. Doggy style!" -

shinga

"like I know anything about football other than my recipie for the kickass chicken wings I make for SuperBowl parties." -

fyreflyblue

(February 6th: party at

fyreflyblue's house! BYOB. -AL)

"In the annual girls-play-football at my high school, just about everyone was a tight-end because then they could write that on their asses. So that's the only position I know." -

moocow1985

"The big scary guy named Bubba" -

nihilistbear

(No, it's a big scary guy named Butkus. A name, incidently, that many of you found amusing. -AL)

"Honestly, I have no idea, but I've been giggling furtively at Dick Butkus for a bit now. Hee. Dick Butkus." -

prettypinkkitty

"There was a guy who had cruel enough parents to call him DICK Butkus? It's like Monty Python! 'My friend, Biggus Dickus'..." -

wyldirishtric

"I attended the Holiday Bowl on December 30 [drunken pictures forthcoming] and watched the Cal Bears get trounced by stupid Texas Tech. I also think that Dick Butkus has funny names." -

bummerfly

(Remember everyone, there are bonus points awaiting anyone who posts photos of themselves being drunk & silly on New Year's. Unless you're underage, in which case strike the "drunk" part & focus on silly. -AL)

"I thought there was a quarter-, half-, and fullback in American football. There's not a middle-back, is there?" -

v827

(Not ... quite. -AL)

Correct Answer: Middle linebacker.

"He isn't the quarterback sacker,
Or even the end zone attacker,
He stops and he blocks,
Those men built like ox,
Hooray for the defensive linebacker." -

sskipstress

(Keep 'em coming, baby. -AL)

b) In football/soccer, which position is responsible for stealing the ball and redirecting it to the forwards, and sometimes taking shots at the goal?

"All I know is that soccer players look cute in their shorts. I'm seeing a theme in my sports knowledge." -

ccaretta

(It's not just you. -AL)

"The Hooker. or is that Rugby? Man, rugby players are delicious. I remember in high school, at a pep rally, I noticed that the men's rugby team had shorter shorts than the women's team. I couldn't believe what nice legs the guys had. I never thought about checking out a guy's legs before that day. Wow." -

jelymo

"This one might be missionary position. There is scoring involved." -

erinlin

"The wing. KFC's chicken wings do particularly well, I hear. Ostrich wings don't. Peacock wings are good for intimidating the other team." -

elektron

(Speaking of peacock wings ... -AL)

"David Beckham." -

nihilistbear,

twistedskein

"The chief hooligan." -

jacesan

"Just as most British folk have no idea what American football is (apart from a notion that it's like Rugby, but played with padding and way too many advert breaks) many British folk also don't give a toss about the original football game (aka soccer). Unless of course it's the Shrovetide Royal Football Match played in Ashbourne, Derbyshire once a year. (I had to google to get the link, I hope that's allowed...) Much more fun!" -

m31andy

(Googling for a link is fine. Especially when it's funny, like that one. -AL)

"Well, clearly the theme is 'things that are in the middle of other things,' so I'm going to go with Guy In The Middle. Wait, except I played soccer when I was a kid. There were only, like, 5 positions. OMG halfback! Dude! I know the actual answers this week!" -

elsajeni

Correct Answer: Midfielder (or halfback).

4. What is it called when a person in their 40s or 50s suddenly undergoes a rapid realignment of priorities and values, sometimes taking radical behavioral steps like getting a divorce or buying a Ferrari?

"Puberty 2: Electric Boogaloo" -

lots42

"What's the big deal? It's like hitting the 'reset' button on the PS2." -

richcsigs

"The naked-chick in rose petals phase. Followed by the smoking pot phase, which is quickly followed by the my-neighbour-thinks-I'm-gay phase. Followed by the dead phase." -

nekoama

(+1, American Beauty. -AL)

"I've never known anyone who actually did it so I think it's probably more myth than reality." -

binderbright

(Just keep reading. -AL)

"Hot Flash. (That's what my 54-yo mother called her red Camaro, after years of sensible four-doors.)" -

gleefulfreak

"For my mom's 51st birthday, she bought herself a convertible in write-me-a-ticket red. She gets a bit upset when we refer to it as the Mid-Life-Crisis-Mobile, but she hung up her leopard-skin dice with pride." -

fyreflyblue

"Midlife Crisis. Just ask my Mom, Dad, and half the damn neighbourhood! Mom's is selling the house, and Dad got a tattoo." -

lynbug

"In my house it was called 'Daddy's going to go live with his secretary now.'" -

gnomeprincess

"My dad got a girlfriend and a Miata, not necessarily in that order." -

dragonessasmith

"My dad wasted his midlife crisis by going to Mount Everest and trekking instead of buying a flash car, no joke. I got a t-shirt from a monastery and some prayer flags, which I mean, thumbs up, but still. I could have had fun with that car." -

prettypinkkitty

"I constantly accuse my dad of having one... for example, the other day, he bought a new brand of tissue. That's wild living right there. Next he could replace the rug by the front door, then its all over... thats how you know there's a foot in the grave." -

shinga

"She's converted from Yaweh to Isis,
And picked up some other fun vices,
A purple silk sari,
And a bright red Ferrari,
Do you think it's a mid-life crisis?" -

sskipstress

"Midlife Crisis. Am I allowed to have one at age 16?" -

varda222

(Sure, if you're only planning to live to age 32. -AL)

"Assuming the average lifespan is 70, a midlife crisis would take place at 35 or so. In the 40s or 50s, we're getting into the two-thirds (46) life crisis and the three-and-a-quarter (52) life crisis." -

calankh

"...unless your ex-wife cuts the brakes on the Ferrari, killing you and your mistress, in which case it is posthumously called an end-of-life crisis." -

silk_knickers

Correct Answer: Mid-life crisis.

"A Midwife Crisis. No, wait, that's just a shortage of colonial-age nurses." -

ashfault76

5. For the following set of numbers:

34
65
92
65
65
43
18
50
34

give the mean, median, and mode.

(When I wrote this question, I knew it would unleash a storm of math-hatred from all of you. But I don't regret doing it. The LJDQ is here to teach something new, every week. So pay attention! There will be a quiz later on this material! -AL)

"OMG, math. I demand a threesome with the LJDQ mods." -

afterwards

(Sorry, it's only me this week. -AL)

"I was told there would be no math on this test." -

nihilistbear

(You were told wrong. -AL)

"Statistics was the whole reason I changed my major in college. I decided to avoid them at all costs, then you spring them on me. EVIL!" -

badgerbabe

"You could've at least put them in order for us, meanie." -

silk_knickers

(Instead I put them into disorder. -AL)

"Okay! I'm allowed to use a calculator, right? That's not cheating is it? Just to make sure, I'll do it on paper. If I had a digital camera I'd show you the proof, but you'll just have to believe me." -

metalphoenix

(OK, we'll go through these one at a time. The MEAN is the mathematical average of a set of values. You add them all up, then divide by the number of values that make up the set. Got it?)

"51.7778 is the meanest number because it wasn't chosen for this list. It was dropped off somewhere between exit 50 and 65 on the Highway of loneliness." -

dancingsaracen

"personally I think number 18 is the meanest number, it even looks mean. You can really see it stealing lunch money from the rest of the numbers, along with 43 and 50, 18's henchmen." -

m31andy

"If I knew what a mean, median and mode WAS, I would. You're not going to give me the Dutch translation, are you? Also, don't think this is some wussy way of getting out of this. Just because I study English doesn't mean I get scared of numbers. I like numbers, especially pi: 3,1415926535. See? I know pi! How many language people know that, huh? Anyway, I'm GUESSING the median is 46.6, but if it's wrong, I blame it on English being my second language and I do SO know math!" -

dracothelizard

(The MEDIAN is the value that half the values in the set are above and half are below. In a set with an even number of values, you add the two middles ones together & divide by two to get the median. Everyone still with me?)

"Greenwich. Oh, sorry that's the meridian. Two letters out." -

m31andy

"The median is also 65, because I said so. Also, six and five make up eleven, and six minus five is one. There are two ones in eleven, and there are two instances of the number 65 in the question. Six times five is thirty, three plus zero is three, which is six divided by two (the number of digits in 65) and is, coincidentally, just two numbers away from five, the second digit in 65. Six divided by five is 1.2, which, multiplied by twice five, becomes twelve--half of which is six. Five divided by six is a non-truncating decimal, which just makes it really cool. Really cool. And it's a good speed limit. Therefore, ergo, thus, Q. E. D., the median is 65." -

turgidnothings

"NOOOOO! Not THIS time! DIE NUMBERS DIE! *delete delete delete *" -

erinlin

"Did I mention I hit the median on I-95 during last week's snow storm?" -

ajmcoqui

(The MODE is the value that occurs most frequently in the set of values. Are you all still paying attention?)

"I don't think so, Scooter." -

whiski_sour

"One. Two. Five. 'Three, sir!'" -

perkyczarlet

(I think you're guessing. But have a +1 for the Holy Grail ref. -AL)

"the best kind of pie." -

jelymo

"Ooooh, measures of central tendency! It's just like the first week of stats class. I can DO these! ... (and the standard deviation is 22.348, but that doesn't go with this week's theme so well. It also means that only the poor person with a 92 would get any kind of an A, and no solid B's. Harsh)." -

fyreflyblue

(Going above & beyond by giving me extra statistical measurements normally would be enough to earn you the coveted Geek of the Week. But

ataralas has successfully defended her title with this ... -AL)

"e, p, 0. Aw, fuckit, I can't be wrong. Mean=51 and 7/9, median=50, mode=65. I even made a histogram for you.

I'd also like to note that the fact that the mean and the median are close together indicates a low level of skew, but that the mode is very different from the other two indicates that this is probably not selection from a normalized distribution." -

ataralas

(Winner, still Geek Champion, & probably down 9 or 10 points by now,

ataralas is again our GotW. -AL)

Correct Answer: Mean = 51.78, Median = 50, Mode = 65.

"That was painful... did I meantion I hate you?" -

allieg

(Wretched pun. And as for the math questions, the original QuizMaster once made us factor a polynomial. You're getting off easy! -AL)

6. Briefly outline your plans for achieving peace in the Middle East.

"My plans for... what? I have plans for peace? *begins checking files* Destroying Australia... having a margurita next Thursday... Hmm, on the 18th I have a dinner party.... No, no I don't see it... Wait... nope. I don't know whose notes you're reading, but they're not mine. Ooo, it's blueberry pieday this Wednesday! *glees*" -

nekoama

"Let smarter people than I work on it--preferably people who know what China calls itself, and other important diplomatic information." -

v827

"Royal Rumble Steel Cage Match between the leaders of the various factions! Sunday, Sunday, Sunday!" -

trishalynn

"Indoor plumbing and free copies of National Geographic." -

lots42

(You never know, it could work. -AL)

"Phase One: Collect underpants.
Phase Two:
Phase Three: World peace (and profit)." -

kassandra05

(Here,

mcclintock filled in the missing step for you. -AL)

"a). Steal Underpants
b) Invent incredibly addictive MMO called Muslims and Devils, or just subcontract Blizzard to do it. Get everyone in middle east computer and free lifetime subscription.
c) Profit." -

mcclintock

"Peace in the Middle East? Are you kidding? There's no way. They've been fighting over there for centuries. It's like an everlasting cock fight. You can't shut one of those down. Even the cops showing up doesn't stop it. Best idea is to put five bucks on a bird, sit back, and watch the feathers fly." -

whiski_sour

(Dave Barry said, of peace in the Middle East, "There will never be peace in the Middle East. Millions of years from now, when humanity has ceased to exist and only microbes cover the Earth, the microbes in the Middle East will still hate each other." - CV)

(Hey look! One comment from Africa! Hi Hans! *waves* -AL)

"It’s actually very long and complicated, but it involves smacking everyone upside the head. The Middle East shall soon see the light, by way of my Mighty Backhand of Justice." -

erinlin

"The only true was to peace lies through nuclear holocaust, and not just in the Middle East. We should preempt the terrorists by just nuking New York City, San Francisco, and Washington DC." -

calankh

(Numbers have not yet been invented that can express how many points you just lost. -AL)

"Well, we could convert them all to the same religion- worshipping me. But I don't think that will work. So, develop alternatives to fossil fuels. Give a homeland to the Palestinians. Make Jerusalem and Mecca self-governing cities, not part of any country (like the Vatican). Provide scholarships to Western universities for Middle Eastern students, esp. women." -

lotusbiosm

"I don't really have a plan, but I think that I have an idea for ending the war AND cutting down on landfill waste, all at once! How about instead of building destructive bombs and WMDs, we just chuck dirty diapers and garbage at our enemies? Go ahead and laugh. I'd like to see the person who can hold their position under a barrage of dirty diapers, coffee grounds, and rancid meat packaging. It is fear of garbage that will keep this global community in line." -

seidoo_ryuu

"Ship them some Canadian beer, the Tragically Hip, and some hot broads from Hooters. That'll amuse the men. As for the women, the Chippendale dancers could assist in that matter. We'll just have a huge keg party with NHL Players as bouncers (they need something to do during the lockout)." -

lynbug

"I figure we could give everyone there a livejournal, and then all the fighting and screaming would happen online instead of IRL." -

dragonessasmith

(We should pass this idea along to Six Apart, see what they think. -AL)

"The only possible plan I can suggest for peace in the Middle East is shipping the entire region to Mars." -

elsajeni

"Cookies, milk, and international tag all day long. We should all go back to being kindergartners. We could have naptime!" -

wyldirishtric

"Like warring children, what these two groups need is stable enforced boundary lines. That means Israel doesn't go building block towers in Palestine's room at night, and Palestine doesn't respond by blowing up Israel's toys. Wow, another area of the world I have offended. Shoot." -

ellenneithernor

"Everybody has to go to their rooms and think about what they've done. Or maybe we need a lot of 'time out' corners." -

3jane

"Get them all to join ljdq. They'll be so busy trying to come up with witty answers that all their other problems will suddenly fade into the background and seem unimaginably petty. Just make sure each faction is quoted equally to prevent the outbreak of 'I'm funnier than you hahaha' inspired jihads." -

limegreen_sloth

(That means, you would leave peace in the hands of me & CV? Lordy, you must be a n00b. -AL)

"I think we should send them all pudding and play a collection of Sting's works. Throw in some alcohol if we have to, if y'all don't mind sharing your stash. It might just work." -

jelymo

"To make the middle east stop fighting
Will take something very exciting
Like a visit from god
Or a rain of fresh cod
Like those old prophets always were writing." -

sskipstress

(I don't think there really is a correct answer to this question, but anyway ...)

Correct Answer: "You know, for true peace, I think the answer is just to find some middle ground." - bunnyfer

And that's all we've got for this week. If any of you see

fizrep, arrest him immediately for desertion. If you see

chaosvizier ... wow, that would be impressive, because he's helluva far from home right now. Aaaand if any of you see me, please buy me a drink. I hope you all enjoy your weekend, & a new Quiz will be posted on Monday.

Rock on,

AL.

Current Mood: tired

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

ciara-belle.livejournal.com

(-10,000! And there are no other moderators around to stop me! MWAHAHAHAHA! -AL)

Jealously is so unbecoming. ;)

From:

angledge.livejournal.com

You know, in my heart of hearts, I know the Eagles are going to trip over their own shoelaces in the playoffs AGAIN this year. Three years, three trips to the NFC Championship Games, three losses.

But I'm an Eagles fan, so despite all of this, I still have to be obnoxious. *flips you the bird*

Though named daily, it is weekly. Behold the first mystery.

Live Journal Daily Answers, 7 January 2005

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