ljdq | LJ Daily Answers: 13 October 2008

chaosvizier.livejournal.com posting in

ljdq

Good morning everyone, and welcome! Let's have a warm welcoming round of applause for

buzz, our first guest moderator of the season! Let's have another round for

lovellama, who's still hanging in there as a long-term guest. And finally, big cheers for

angledge, who is taking time trying to help people in hurricane-smashed Texas. Mostly because that's her job.

"I have no excuse for not playing, because I am unemployed and sitting at home all day. Except for the fact that you are mocking me with money. Unfair, mods!" -

lafourchette

1. What was the original name of the iconic mustachioed character on the cover of the game of "Monopoly"?

"Mustachioed? Is that like mustard flavored pistachios?" -

akiyasan,

marilyth,

neblinaclara,

spatialrift47
"Mustachio Pudding would be the best name for a gay metal band EVAR." -

fizrep

"He had a name? Seriously? All my life he was just the funny-looking nameless guy with the cute little dog! Does the dog have a name too?" -

dragon_within

"Original name? I sense a trap. I know he's called Uncle Moneybags now but I bet he used to have some charming 1930s name like 'Ike Mouse-Potato' that doesn't make any damn sense to us now." -

rikchik

"It's gotta be Sting." -

islandofwords,

squeegibo

(Sorry, that's the next question. -CV)

"Congress!" -

spiralgirl1

(Nancy Pelosi has got to shave that 'stache. Srsly. -CV)

"Snidely Whiplash" -

wiredwizard

"Daddy Warbucks" -

david_deacon

"William Taft." -

la_trombonista

(That's a bad moustache- -B
Shut your mouth! -LL
I'm talking about Taft! -B
And I can dig it. -CV)

"Bill Gates used to have a mustache?" -

twbubbles,

sarekofvulcan
"They should just replace him with the Windows logo. Says it all, really." -

seldear
"

drbear would tell you, 'If it's a Monopoly, it has to be Bill Gates!!!!'" -

tweeti
(Three hours, twenty-four minutes later:)
"Monopoly? It has to be BILL GATES!" -

drbear

(+1 to

tweeti; good call. -CV)

"I got arrested the last time I had to deal with this sort of question." -

nunshavingfun

(Go directly to Jail. Do not pass Go. Do not collect $200. -CV)

"Joe Sixpack. Monopoly thought it would sell better if instead of an elitist banker, they had something more like a plumber as the mascot. That idea was scrapped when they realized that Americans have brains, but the Joe Sixpack Mustache remains." -

rhiannonjk

"Oscar Mike Golf, I witnessed a game of Beeropoly- Canadian Edition. I was throughly disappointed in their choice for the 'Boardwalk' place, as although Piper's Pale Ale (from Victoria, BC) is not a BAD beer, there's soo many other better local microbreweries." -

palapaloozaa

"Colonel Mustard, but he got bored of banking, and moved into murder instead" -

iamza,

majorsamfan,

etumukutenyak

(I believe that nowadays, murder is much more profitable than banking. 'struth. -CV)

"Uncle Moneybags. Or Pennybags. But moneybags makes more sense, since there are no pennies in Monopoly. And if there were, they'd all be lost in the couch cushions by now." -

nadat

"

" -

lirimaer

Correct Answer: Rich Uncle (Milburn) Pennybags

(He is often mistakenly referred to as Mr. Moneybags. Hasbro has officially changed his name to Mr. Monopoly. I call -1, LAMENESS on Hasbro. -CV)

2. Fun with lyrics! Easy, even! Name the band and the song:
"We gotta install microwave ovens
Custom kitchen deliveries
We gotta move these refrigerators
We gotta move these colour tvs"

"Lyrics...too...stupid...to...Process. ERROR ERROR DANGER DANGER!" -

b_hulsmans

"No Billy Idol?" -

seldear

(HELLS NO. -B)

"If it's not in Rock Band, I don't know it." -

shahnasa

(You and me both. -CV)

(We'll make sure to check the track list for each quiz from now on. -B)

"I like my song with pennies in it better. It's a drinking song that makes fun of French. Then again, it's also medieval. Meh."

kaerran

(+1, making fun of the French. -B)

"I may be one of the few lurking here who actually remembers when MTV actually showed music videos..." -

n5iln

(You are not alone. -AL&CV&LL&B)

"The Lament of Mario & Luigi, from before they discovered retrofitting castles for bathrooms and rescuing princesses from Another Castle was a much more profitable enterprise." -

soberloki

"You know, after forgetting about the quiz for many months, the thing that jolted my memory is listening to Sting on Thursday night. So I'm going to have to go with tradition and say 'Sting'." -

shadowkeeper and quite a few others

(For once, not entirely incorrect. -CV)

"I Want My MTV, properly known as Money For Nothing by ... wait, wait, I'll get it, probably at 2:00 a.m., it's Mark Knopfler's group ... and it was an absolutely brilliant music video. I reserve the right to amend this answer, I'm not gonna Google it, I'm *not* gonna Google it..." -

jmthane
(And, three days later...)
"Day 3: I still can't come up with that band's name! *headdesk*headdesk*headdesk* I know it's in there, *let it out*!!! *headdesk*headdesk*headdesk* No, it's *not* Deep Purple - that was Ritchie Blackmore! *headdesk*headdesk*headdesk* ..." -

jmthane

(Mmmmm... the sweet sweet taste of frustration. -CV)

"Oh man, I saw this video like fifty thousand times on MTV and I couldn't honestly tell you the name or the singer or anything. I think the Music part of my brain just got eaten by the 'Comics have boobies' part." -

lots42

"Hey! A fun with lyrics question in which I've actually heard the song. I may have no idea what it's called, or the band name, but I know the next lyrics: They go something along the lines of 'That ain't workin, that's the way you do it, money for nothing, and your chicks for free.' So I'll guess 'Money for Nothing,' by Guy Lombardo and His Royal Canadians." -

dhole

"Low blow Joe! Giving us a song we know, but infecting us with an earworm! I thought you were better than that, dontcha know." -

rhiannonjk

"I wouldn't be a real metalhead if I didn't say this was from AC/DC's 'Money for Nothing'. Can I have money for nothing and checks for free?"

ifeedformula

(Ma'am, this is the Metalhead Police. We're sorry to report the song you're thinking of is actually Money Talks. We're afraid we need to cite you for this, and the fine is to appear in a Whitesnake video. We appreciate your time. -B)

"When I was a kid, I always thought it was 'cheques for free'." -

palapaloozaa

(It is if you're in Canada. -B)

"'Money For Nothing', starring Sting, guest starring Dire Straits. But mostly Sting. Sting, Sting, Sting." -

kristinmachina

(And Sting did in that song what he does best: repeat the same lyric OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER AND OVER. -B)

"'Money for Nothing' by Dire Straits, whose lead man has a dinosaur named after him! How awesome is that?!" -

blindgeoff

(Knopflersaurus Rex? -CV)

Correct Answer: Dire Straits, "Money For Nothing"

3. Who was M's secretary?

"I am probably the only person on the planet with access to a TV who has not seen any Star Wars, Indianna Jones or James Bond. My boss was shaking his head at me today for this fact." -

selenityshiroi

"He had a bunch of secretaries. A, E, I, O, U, and when none of them were available, Y. I think E was the first one he killed." -

dhole

(Don't forget W, too – LL)
(Most of the world is trying its best to forget W. -CV)

"N. It used to be O, but O had to P, so they asked Q, but Q said "you R not paying me enough", S had a T time, U had VD, W was celebrating X-mas, and Y said "Z you later."" -

spatialrift47

"S. For Secretary." -

babybokal

(+1, Maggie Gylenhaal. -B)

"I think the more relevant question here is 'who was M.' I mean, who goes by a single letter, anyway?" -

shahnasa

(Let's ask Jay Z, P Diddy, or Dubya. We'd ask Notorious B.I.G., but he needed three letters because he was fat, so he doesn't quite count. Also, he's dead. -CV)

" This puts a new meaning to 'melts in your mouth, not in your hands'. -CV

This puts a new meaning to 'melts in your mouth, not in your hands'. -CV

" -

rhiannonjk

"That would be 'F.' He didn't hire her for her typing skills, if you know what I mean..." -

david_deacon

"It has to be one of the smaller Roman numerals... I'll go with V." -

thepikey

"I'm sure you're expecting someone to make an S&M reference, aren't you?" -

queeney

"W's senior secretary is Condelezza Rice, so M's must be Ecir Azzelednoc, which sounds like a terrorist's name if I've ever heard one." -

captainsblog

"Miss 'You were always a cunning linguist, James' Moneypenny." -

majorsamfan

"Miss Moneypenny. By the way, what fuck is a quantum of solace, anyway?? " -

kristinmachina

(An itty bitty teeny tiny smidgen of revenge. Just forget about the metaphysical title and watch the damn movie already. – LL)

"Miss Moneypenny, which bothered me when I was a kid. Bond spends all of that time flirting with her... it left me confused about money and sex. Whee! " -

soberloki

"The gal whose signature tune might as well be a Rickroll. I mean, come on: 'Never gonna give you up, never gonna let you down ...' -- if that doesn't describe Moneypenny's relationship with Bond to a T, what does?" -

germankitty

"M being played by Dame Judi Dench would make that a bit awkward, no?" -

4492
"If M had any brains at all, it would be a succession of attractive male underwear models." -

reticent_lass

(Does anybody remember this thing called the late 1900s when M was a dude? Anyone? -CV)

"Dame Judi Dench doesn't need a secretary. Dame Judi Dench will not only drop Chuck Norris like third period French without breaking a sweat, she will do it without breaking the bank- as long as Bond doesn't go and buy another damn Aston Martin with the company card again. Bastard." -

katiebgood

Correct Answer: Ms. Jane Moneypenny

4. What film featured Paul Newman, Tom Cruise, and a lot of sticks and balls?

"I have no idea but it sounds dirty." -

kestrel127 and, oh, about half of you
"Sounds like a porno if you ask me." -

chershey and everyone else

"You had me at 'Paul Newman.' Then you had me again at 'sticks and balls.'" -

babybokal

"I can feel the innuendoes multiplying like loaves and fishes here..." -

packbat

"I'm going to guess 'Jerry Maguire', which featured the line 'Show me the money!', and steer my broken, sordid brain away from anything involving money shots." -

distaff_exile

"Ah, one of the quality films from the 'I R NOT INSANE SCIENTOLOGIST' era. Wish I could remember it. He juggled booze bottles, right? Probably made bartender's lives a living hell. 'Hey, barkeep, let me have that bottle.' 'No..' CRASH. Stupid movies." -

lots42

(That would be Cocktail you're thinking of. And man does that title just add to how low this question is going. -B)

"I was going to make a 'Hello Newman' joke here, but then I stopped myself. Because I thought it, I'm sure plenty of others will too. Do you think I could just make a Xenu joke here? Preferably without being sued, that is." -

umbralcorax

"Sticks and balls sounds like baseball, or possibly croquet... Paul Newman I know very little about, except that he's dead... Tom Cruise is insane... so I'll have to go with 'The Princess Bride'"."

rachelkachel

(And the

ljdq Logic Renunciation Award this week goes to...

rachelkachel! -CV&B)

"What we got here ... is failure to SAVE ME, XENU." -

spatialrift47

(Not even Xenu can save his movie career now. -B)

"Interview with the Hustler" -

i_calql8

"Is there such thing as a movie about Tom Cruise that doesn't involve balls? Or wish it did, at any rate. (Oh yes. I went there.)" -

3771

"My first three answers to this question wouldn't pass the censor, so I'll just say that Sting was in the Bee Movie with John Goodman, and John Goodman was in Death Sentence with Kevin Bacon. Hmm, that was a short one. I could have gone the really cheap route and simply mentioned that Tom Cruise was in A Few Good Men with Kevin Bacon, but that wouldn't have brought Sting into the equation, and it's already been pointed out that you can't go wrong by mentioning Sting in the LJDQ." -

n5iln

"Any movie with Paul Newman had balls, but I think you mean 'Color of Money' where he reprised his role as The Hustler which sounds kinda dirty since Larry Flynt." -

majorsamfan

(Just remember the character is known as "The Hustler" and the magazine is just called "Hustler" and you'll be fine. -B)

"The Stain on the Couch is Not Salad Dressing" -

a_l_p_h_a_b_e_t

"Newman's second-best flick, after Slap Shot." -

etcet

(Tru dat. – LL)

"The only movie I've seen with Paul Newman in it is The Sting. ...crud, now I have The Entertainer stuck in my head. Thanks, LJDQ." -

kaerran

"o_O Just how many sticks and balls do Paul Newman and Tom Cruise have between them?" -

twubbles

"The Color of Money. Despite your best efforts, I will not make a dirty joke about Paul. He was too classy for that shit. Tom, on the other hand, can sit on a pool cue." -

kristinmachina

Correct Answer: The Color Of Money

"Blasphemy! To make fun of the recently dead is no joke. Now, you apologize right now to Tom Cruise's Acting Career, okay?" -

trishalynn

5. The art movement "Impressionism" took its name from a painting by which French artist?

"Considering the theme, has to be Gauguin. I mean, it's not like it's Monet or anything, right? Just because his name is pronounced Moh-NAY... it's ......" -

girl_who_is1337

(Go ahead. We'll wait. -B)

"Monet. Really? Really, guys?" -

theninth
"That is a terrible pun and you should be ashamed of yourselves." -

rachelkachel
"Monet. And that's cheating. SHAME ON YOU, LJDQ!" -

stagemanager
"Monet. Such punnishment." -

distaff_exile
"What -- AL is temporarily absent, and the *coughbest*cough* kinda-sorta pun CV and LL can come up with for this week's theme is 'Monet'?!? *is deeply disappointed in mods*" -

germankitty

(Hey, we're on a budget here. -CV)

"Lessee...Rembrandt, Picasso and Da Vinci are the wrong ethnicity. Dali, too much acid. Kahlo, too many bones. Therefore, Count de Money. (IT'S DE MONET.)" -

fax_celestis,

edwardina

(+1, History of the World, Part 1 -CV&LL&B)

"You know, I went to an art gallery once, and they were giving away baby hens for a small price. But because I was friends with the guy handing them out, he just gave me a couple for no charge. The gallery also had a raffle to give away free poster of an impressionist painting, which I won, and still have hanging today. So, you could say, I got my Monet for nothing, and my chicks for free." -

umbraxcorax

"i dunno, but was it by that crazy guy? you know, the one who chopped off his own ear, and then died from the syphallis?" -

kira_snugz

(You mean Richard Nixon? -CV)

"Jacques Clouseau." -

islandofwords

"Jacques Cousteau? It's always Jacques Cousteau." -

katiebgood

(Except when it's, you know, ART. -CV)

"Frank Caliendo." -

drbear

"Raphael. He's cool but rude, you know." -

dhole

(+1, TMNT. -CV)

"Franc Gorshin" -

i_calql8

(Just because he's black on one side and white on the other doesn't make him an Impressionist. -CV)

"'Oh Come On, Someone Has To Like Melting Clocks' by Salvador Dali" -

kaerran

"Jacque L'Impression. It's like Hulk-mania, but more fufu." -

a_l_p_h_a_b_e_t

"I will not say 'I don't know, but I bet it made an impression'" -

selenityshiroi

"I know this work -- there's a sun in the sky, it's like a pizza pie and that's a Monet!" -

etumukutenyak

"How do you tell when you're Baroque? When you're out of Monet!" -

uncut_diamond,

squeegibo,

lafourchette

(Just remember, if it ain't Baroque, don't fix it. -B)

"Molyneux is the only French surname I can think of right now (apart from Dubravchic but I have no idea how to even spell that) so we shall say _____[Insert preferred given name here] Molyneux." -

jechocochan

(I'll insert Peter there, and give myself a +1 for mentioning one of the best and worst game designers of all time. Ask me what I think of him after I get my hands on Fable 2. -B)

(Populous will always reign supreme in my mind. Sinking earth into the ocean and watching those poor little guys flail around in the water until they drowned was a high point in my early computer gaming career. -CV)

"Ever notice how art and bowels are both described in terms of movements?" -

spatialrift47

(Don't forget sections of a symphony. -B)

"I always used to get Monet & Manet confused, but realized that Monet was better and he was blind. Amazing!" -

marilyth

"Manet. Or Monet. Which one married his mistress?" -

3771

(Mitterand. -CV)

"Monet, Manet. You say potato, I say insipid watercolour degeneracy. " -

soberloki

"Cher: No, she's a full-on Monet.
Tai: What's a Monet?
Cher: It's like a painting, see? From far away, it's OK, but up close, it's a big old mess." -

houseofknaus,

killabee886

(+1, Clueless. -CV)

Correct Answer: Claude Monet

6. What do you need money for right now?

"It's a neverending pattern--I need bread to get dough, and I knead dough to get bread, which I guess would make me a gluten for punishment." -

i_calql8

"What kind of question is this? HAVE YOU PEOPLE BEEN WATCHING THE NEWS AT ALL??" -

blunder_buss

"Every goddam thing. Who doesn't?? I have very nearly four kids (

sexyscholar is due in Feb.) and two of them have birthdays this month as does my wife and father, projects, concerts, it's getting time to start shopping for the kids winter clothes, and there's the usual payout for luxuries like continuing to live indoors, eat regular meals and keep gas in the car. I could use a kind and wealthy relative with a bad ticker right now. ;)" -

fmh

(While my co-moderators are sympathetic to your plight, I should point out that the street value of a child has not tanked like the rest of Wall Street. Just saying. -CV)

"College tuition. And by 'college tuition', I of course mean, 'cheap beer'." -

islandofwords

"A super-high-tech jetfighter." -

theninth

(+1, 99 Red Balloons. -CV)

"Nothing! My 'Daddy' provides for everything." -

shahnasa

(And by 'Daddy' she means

buzz. And by 'everything' she means... -CV)
(AHEM. NOTHING TO SEE HERE. MOVE ALONG QUIZZLINGS. NEXT ANSWER. -B)

"I should say 'a new flat' since that's what I'm looking for. But, really? We know I'm going to spend most of what I make on books and CDs." -

lirimaer

(Better books and CDs than...)

"Hookers and Blow!" -

palapaloozaa,

fax_celestis
"Ale and whores!" -

woap
"dope and whores" -

seldear
"Lots and lots of hookers." -

domestik_fucker

"If your mom would ever pay for services rendered, I wouldn't need a day job." -

etcet,

4492

(As always, someone has to go there. -CV)

" I wonder what the tuition is at Hogwarts these days... -CV

" -

captainsblog

"I'm moving in with the boyfriend, and I have a 5.5 foot-tall cat tree to bring into a basement apartment. I need money for opening a wall, frankly." -

soberloki

(Curious... I always thought cats reproduced using that whole sex thing. I had no idea you could just plant the suckers and grow new ones. -CV)

"In order of importance: porn, ramen, a car, gas, and paying for college." -

allie_the_neko

"An Illudium Pu-36 Explosive Space Modulator" -

dragon_within

(+1, Looney Toons. -CV)

"Live, the universe, and everything. With a side of beer and wings." -

uncut_diamond

"Sporks. A lifetime supply of disposable sporks. And maybe a sandwich. Which I would eat with a spork." -

neblinaclara

" Finding Nemo, and Flounder, and Dory, and Gil, and Will Smith, and Megalodon, and Sherman, and... -CV

" -

fizrep

"First I would call for a feast of Gin and Puddins'. Then I would feed the serfs and peasants. I would feed them turfs and pheasants. Then I would have the bells rung thoughout my queendom....As I rode through on a horse, of course, of course." -

tweeti

"To bribe someone to fix the damn roof over my apartment. I'm sure these lovely blue tarps will hold just fine, but it's raining very hard this morning and I don't want to come home to find my bedroom ceiling on my bedroom floor." -

chaobell

(Did someone say "blue tarp"? TO THE ROOFS! -AL)

"my wedding. its nov 2nd, and i simply must have enough gin and pudding to go round. half the people on the invite list are both military and firefighters, and they know how to throw it back, hopefully none of it gets on my dress or my bitch boots. because then i'd have to kick some ass, and the bridezilla bits are supposed to come before the cereoomy." -

kira_snugz

(Congratulations! -CV)

"To be charitable and give it to everybody else." -

akiyasan

(What kind of backward socialist thinking is that?! This is America, and we hoard our cash! -B)

"I need money to get my cat into rehab. He's on a two cheeseburger a day habit and its only getting worse." -

umbralcorax

"I'd gladly pay you Tuesday for a hamburger today." -

rhitsqueaky,

umbralcorax's cat

"Everything. Just everything. In fact, I can't pay for my Internjklfsfdkefh---***SIGNAL LOST***" -

drbear

And that's the way it is. The very loose theme was money, since that's all anyone's been talking about for the past few weeks. And, really, who doesn't want money? I sure love me some money.

Thanks for playing, everyone, and glad to have you all aboard! Thanks again to

buzz, who has given it the old college try and turned up aces! Tune in tomorrow for more exciting adventures with

ljdq! It's the quiz that eats like a meal!

Rock on!

AL&CV&LL&B