ljdq | LJ Daily Answers: 8 September 2008

chaosvizier.livejournal.com posting in

1. What is the French word for snail?

"I initially misread that as 'the French word for small.' I had a great ex-boyfriend-in-Paris joke all lined up." -

bad_latin

"MERDE! ... Okay that's not even close to true but it's quite frankly the only French word I usually think of right off the bat." -

shinga

"I refuse to recognize French as a language unless its spoken by a cartoon skunk." -

tarpo

"omelette du fromage" -

elaran and

ntlespino, within 3 minutes of each other

"Royale with Snail" -

cscottd

"slippery little suckers" -

sometimespez

(Only if you're Julia Roberts. -CV)

"'OUISURRENDIR!' It caused a hell of a lot of problems." -

lots42

"Has the Swedish Chef cooked with snails yet? That'd be funny for him to chase them around and watch them get stuck to the ceiling." -

akiyasan

"I still don't understand how the culture that gives us croissants to nom nom nom is also the same culture that insists that snails are food." -

twbubbles

"Exactly how drunk and hungry or desperate would one have to be to think that a snail looks tasty? I mean, seriously. 'Dude, you know what I could totally go for right now? Some self-propelled snot on the half shell.'" -

etcet

"Escargot, which clearly comes form lolsnail speak. It is the answer to the question, 'Hey, Monsieur Snail, is that your home on your back?' 'No! Is cargo!'" -

vzg

"Escargot (a tasty conveyance of garlic butter.)" -

hugh_mannity,

cmseward,

rhiannonjk,

spyderqueen,

deza,

pennyverse

"Tattoo: D'Escargot Plane! D'Escargot Plane! (How snail mail gets there.)" -

majorsamfan

"A snail went in to buy a car. The salesman said 'what would you do with a car?' The snail said 'I want to paint an S on the door and drive it really fast so the people I drive by will say 'Look at that S car go!''" - 20 of you

"'Escargotstuffedinmushroomsandsmotheredincheese' Said in a snooty french accent and followed by an exuberant restaurant bill." -

jwpandabear

"Escargot. I maintain this as proof that the French cooks really hated that their noble masters... 'Pierre! Today I gave the Count snails from the garden for dinner!'" -

blindgeoff

Correct Answer: Escargot

"...which, roughly translated means, 'I doubledogdare you to eat that slimy thing.'" -

ifeedformula

2. What language was created by Ludwig Lazarus Zamenhof in 1887?

"The creator of Pig Latin was better known as Udwig-lay Azarus-lay Amenhof-Zay." -

drbear and 11 other speakers of igpay atinlay

"Hurdehurdehur..Assa evaboddy already know, Zamenhof issa Svedish name. Bork bork bork! He'ssa creatin Swedish Chef talk, hur de hur hur. BORK BORK BORK!" -

ifeedformula

"His name looks vaguely German, so I'l bet it was/is an efficient language." -

cmseward

"Klingon" - 12 of you
"19th Century Klingons were awesome." -

dhole
"I absolutely love the fact that more people speak Klingon than speak Esperanto. Is that geeky of me?" -

cjtremlett

"Canadian" -

b_hulsmans

"Parseltongue." -

confusedpuppy,

wowwhony

"Ebonics. Ludwizza in da hood, yo! He a gansta." -

faery_wing,

tweeti,

cold_clarity

"lolcat." -

jennielf,

puredeadthingy,

deza

"With an eye to the middle name... it was most certainly an undead language..." -

reticent_lass

(Hey, those zombies gotta communicate somehow... -CV)

"A guy with a name like that has to be a geek. That long ago means it has to be archaic. I'll say 'cobol'." -

thepikey

"He wanted to call it Lulaza, but they made him change it to Esparanto. Spoilsports." -

iamza

"Zamenhofenese? I would totally take a sememster to study abroad in Zamenhofistan to learn this truly fine language." -

fictionalsolace

"I would venture to guess that it was Morris Code - but wasn't that invented by a man named 'Morris?'" -

rhiannonjk

"What won't William Shatner do?" -

zihuatanejo,

marasca

(For the record, I knew exactly what it was you were linking to. Truly, Shatner is like unto a god. -CV)

"Esperanto, a language that failed almost as much as Battlefield Earth" -

killabee886

"Esperanto. As used by slippery Jim Digriz, the stainless steel rat." -

esran,

blindgeoff,

tarpo

"Esperanto, where the wind comes sweepin' down the plain!" -

uadlika

"Esperanto, which only 120 years later is just about as dead as Sanskrit." -

jmthane

"His HOPES for a universal language were never realized." -

majorsamfan

Correct Answer: Esperanto

"What is Esperanto for snail, anyway?" -

ineptshieldmaid

3. Who is Charlie Sheen's brother?

"Definitely not the most embarrassing member of the family." -

drbear

"Mycroft. Doesn't Mycroft Sheen have a nice ring to it? And it totes makes up for his slight last week." -

wrestlingdog

"Do people actually admit they're related to Charlie Sheen anymore?" -

zihuatanejo

(I think Martin kinda has to. -CV)

"Marty Shines" -

jechocochan

"I think a more important question is When did Denise Richards become the crazy one on that pair? and how did Charlie Sheen turn 'Alcoholic whoring' into not only a successful career but an endearing quality." -

tarpo

"Whoever he is, he wishes he was the banana king." -

fictionalsolace

(Just put a banana in your ear. -CV)

"Judging by the train-wreck qualities of their lives, I'd say Courtney Love if only she were a dude. Wait, maybe she is..." -

thepikey

"I have Billy Jean in my head now. Thanks a lot." -

akiyasan

"

" -

packbat and 8 others

"Gloria Estefan" -

cscottd

"Emilio Sheen." -

buzz,

cmseward
"As someone (Dave Barry maybe?) said, Emilio Sheen sounded too much like a hair product." -

rikchik

"Billy the Kid *swoon*" -

rhiannonjk

"The coach of the Anaheim Mighty Ducks, as well as member of the maybe-aptly named 80's Brat pack. HAHAHA! I KNOW SOMETHING FROM BEFORE I WAS BORN! SOON, I SHALL CONQUER ALL. Take that, LJDQ." -

queeney

(See, youngsters? It really CAN be done! -AL&CV&LL)

"John Cryer." - 6 of you
"Fox Mulder. Screw Scully, how about Two and a Half Men meets Supernatural?" -

reticent_lass

(You had us at "Screw Scully". -AL&CV)

"Do you really think I watch Two and A Half Men...and me being a grammar geek, shouldn't that be Two and 'AN' Half Men?? " -

tweeti

(No, because the 'h' is hard, and needs an 'a', like horse and house. An unsounded 'h' takes an 'an', like honorable and honest. Thus endeth the lesson for today. Ramen. – LL)

(Huh huh, you said 'hard'. -CV)

"Emilio Estevez is the reason they should never do another sports movie, they all fail in comparison to They Mighty Ducks" -

killabee886

"Emilio Estevez, although the Sheens probably should have disowned him when he whored himself out to Disney to chant 'Ducks! Ducks! Ducks!' with a prepubescent Pacey Witter. In retrospect, so many cultural touchstones of my childhood were abusively bad." -

bad_latin

"He was totally hot in The Mighty Ducks. Man I loved that movie." -

spiralgirl1

(Quack. Quack. Quack! Quack! QUACK! QUACK!! – LL)

"You know, no one believed me when I told them that Emilio Estevez and Charlie Sheen were awesome in 'Men At Work.' Come on, garbage men who solve a murder? It's FABULOUSLY horrible." -

aliaspiral

"Emilio 'I'm The Good Brother' Estevez" -

kristinmachina

"Emilio Estevez, which in Esperanto means 'sheen'. Emil Sheen. For once, it's sexier in Esperanto." -

etumukutenyak

"I had a dream one time where I was in an episode of the X Files, which took place in this majestic old country theater, where I was being played by Charlie Sheen. Or I was in Charlie Sheen's body. Back when I had good hair and even fewer checks and balances on my ego, I'd have called it a fairly accurate portrayal, but he's kicking my ass these days." -

etcet

"Ramon Estevez! Ha! I got you now! You wanted Emilio, but I am giving you Ramon!" -

b_hulsmans,

majorsamfan

(That's fair, full credit to you. I should have said "Who is Charlie Sheen's cooler brother?" -CV)

Correct Answer: Emilio Estevez

"Having no intention of playing the quizz, i thought it would be okay for me to cheat, it's not really cheating if i'm not playing, right? Well now i wonder how many webcheaters are going to be as freaked out as me by the fact that Charlie Sheen is on imdb's frontpage when they go look him up today. Coincidences like that don't happen. You're obviously in league with imdb to fuck with people's brain if they try to cheat. Very cunning." -

lunacy_street

(It's like the saying goes: Cheaters never win. -CV)

4. What kingdom was founded by Aescwine in 527 AD?

"Aescwine's still not as cool as Ludwig Lazarus Zamenhof." -

lunartick1989

"Disneyland. Walt won it from him in a bocce game." -

drbear

"What?! Did you run out of questions? You're just making crap up." -

buzz

"Wait, did you just make that up from Civ IV?" -

elaran

(Civ IV is trufax. Do not dispute the voice of Leonard Nimoy. -CV)

"Ass. Wine. No amount of brain bleach can ever make this right." -

ntlespino

"I misread that as 'Awesome'. I want to rule the kingdom of Awesome." -

lots42

"I cannot stop pronouncing that as 'Ass Wine,' so it's either the 'Stop Making Fun of Me, No Really' kingdom or the most awesome kingdom ever. " -

vzg

"Debaucheria. Come on, with a name like 'Ace-wine', you have to throw a killer party." -

fax_celestis

"How in fuck do you pronounce that? Ace swine? ASCII wine? Wut?" -

jessicamariek

"Niagara-on-the-Lake (and surrounds)." -

iamza
"Mmm, ice wine. Wait, what was the question again?" -

twbubbles

(Ice Wine is one of the greatest alcoholic creations ever. -CV)

"Probably the Kingdom of Drunken Debauchery; he has 'wine' right there in his name. No wonder the LJDQ mods like it!" -

bad_latin

"wine here costs as little as a Euro fifty. Cheap wine never tasted so good." -

confusedpuppy

"Zee French are Swine! (You guys are American, right? You think making fun of the French is funny, right?)" -

jwpandabear

(You don't have to be American to appreciate hacking on the French, but it sure helps. -AL&CV&LL)

"the chocolate city ... no, that was Nagin" -

becky_gardens

"Rohan" -

calenlily

"This wasn't covered in my brother's interpretive dance of the Berlin air-drops or the Korean War, and I can't remember the name of the kingdom in Trogdor, so it must be Florin." -

elvenpiratelady

"I'm glad that ruler lived 1500 years ago, because he would NOT want to go through the educational system today. I can think of 3 rude names for him off the top of my head." -

wrestlingdog

"SPARTA!" -

spiralgirl1,

la_trombonista

"The SCA - driving the people nuts since the sixth century!" -

mathnerd

"Aescwine probably sounds like S-Quinn. Quinn is like quint, meaning five. There are five letters in Spain. So I'm going for Spain or 'Espaǹa'." -

rikchik

(And this week's

gruyere Award for Logic Renunciation goes to...

rikchik! Alas, -1 for not using a tilde on the n there. -CV)

"I read this question as what FANDOM was founded by Aescwine in 527, and I got to say, anything Bablyon/Sumeria is my OTP. But I'm also a fan of Hammurabi/Gilgamesh, theirloveissoepic." - Anonymous

(+1 – LL)

"Not a clue, or rather the answer escapes me. Phew, stay on target, stay on target." -

esran

"Logic says 'Estonia.' Logic is boring. I humped a muppet this weekend at Dragon*con, which is more interesting than Estonia." -

etcet

(… which muppet? – LL)

"Essex, which makes me think of sex. But I'm a guy, everything makes me think of sex." -

b_hulsmans

"Wessex si-yeed, b-yatch." -

zihuatanejo

Correct Answer: The Kingdom of Essex

5. Exxon Mobil Corporation markets its products using three primary brand names. Exxon and Mobil are the obvious two; what is the third?

"Corporation" - That's cheap even for this quiz. -1's all around.

"XXX Oil Wrestling!" -

dextradawn

(That sounds like bad Transformers porn waiting to happen. -CV)

"Why did the turtle cross the road? To get to the SHELL station! Har har har." -

ifeedformula

(Man, this really is the week of cheap jokes... -CV)

"So this Spaniard who doesn't speak any English is in a store in the US. He's trying to explain to the clerk what he wants, so he's pointing to the display saying 'eso si que es!' To which the clerk replies, 'oh, socks! Why didn't you say so?'" -

squeegibo

(Foreign language humor is ok, though. -CV)

"My dad managed a Shell gas station for a while. He called it S-hell." -

spiralgirl1

(There's a special hell for everyone. -CV)

"Clampett" -

reticent_lass

"The one they don't tell you: Energon." -

vzg

(CEO Soundwave presiding. -CV)

"I know it's not Sexxon, but that's, like, fifty times better than Esso. Because I'm immature." -

lunartick1989

"PopeMobil!" -

ineptshieldmaid

"Ha ha, we're getting rich and you're not." -

wowwhony

"I Can't Believe It's Not Butter" -

marasca

"Esso, makes your S Car... yeah. Sorry." -

zihuatanejo

"Wow, would you look at all those Esso Bees..." -

buzz,

majorsamfan

"Essoel" -

cscottd

"Lesso my Esso." -

mathnerd

"Esso, who are famous in my mind for managing to explode their natural gas plant in my state 10 years ago and subsequently doom my family to cold baths and no heating for two weeks. Thanks a lot, guys. Really. Thanks." -

3771

"I thought they owned America. I do know they make petroleum jelly. Which is gross and should never be used because, hello, it's PETROLEUM you're smearing on yourself." -

faery_wing

"Esso! And they had a tiger mascot/logo who I always got confused with Tony the Tiger, so naturally I reasoned that they were tiger brothers, both of whom were making their way in the tough mascot business trying to make their tiger dad proud. I was a strange child." -

uadlika

"Starts with S... starts with S... Big Oil... Hm. Smersh was a government agency, so I'll have to go with SPECTRE." -

thepikey

"The Esso tiger could kick Tony's ass. And Putin could kick them both with one hand tied behind his back." -

confusedpuppy

"So apparently when the two companies were discussing their merger one of the things that came up was a new mascot. Their favorite idea was a tiger eating a winged pony." -

pennyverse

(Which conveniently gets rid of all the ponies, so no one can have them – CV&AL&LL)

"Esso, best embodied by this (IMO): NSFW Picture" -

germankitty

Correct Answer: Esso

"Esso. Every Sucker Stops Once"

6. Alliteration time! Say some stuff starting with S.

"Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious" - not as many as expected. Sea shells, however, were sold in surplus.

"'Some stuff starting with S.' See, I follow orders." -

drbear

(We'll let

tweeti be the judge of that… - CV&AL&LL)

"'Thome Thtuff, thtarting with TH.' And if that'th not good enough for the Quith, I'll thue you modth for dithcriminathion againtht Th-leth thpeakerth!" -

germankitty

"Did your older brother ever tell you to name ten cars that start with S, and punch you in the arm until you did? And then keep punching you, because 'All those cars start with gas'? No? For some reason, my wife is afraid of having boy children." -

zihautanejo

(They're little hellions! That's why I stuck with girls. Just gotta keep 'em off the pole… - LL)

(...boy, I hope you didn't mean what I initially thought you meant. -CV)

"Voilà! In view, a humble vaudevillian veteran, cast vicariously as both victim and villain by the vicissitudes of... oh." -

quasar360

(+1, V for Vendetta. -CV)

"Why? What's wrong with, well, W?" -

rachelkachel

"I got nothin. Sorry. (Oh wait, that counts, doesn't it!)" -

cmseward

"Thuffering Thuccotash!" -

ntlespino
"suffering succatash!" -

b_hulsmans

"Sssyour mom." -

dhole

"SSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS i'm a snake SSSSSSSSSSSSS" -

droptheleash622

"Stoned. Spanking. Sex. Spooning. Sleep." -

gaaak

"I dont hiss. But if I did, I would be making puns about Slytherins." -

aliaspiral

"Some slimy slugs shipped salt sacks. Sadly, salt scours slugs, so some suffered sickeningly, shrinking, shriveling." -

woap

(This reminds me of the time when I actually witnessed first-hand how salt affects slugs. But storytime can come later. -CV)

"She sings Sting songs while she shines shoes." -

thepikey

"Sting sells sea shells, starting September second." -

elvenpiratelady

"Sapphist sex simply seems sublime!" -

bad_latin

"She sells seashells by by the sea shore ('seashells' being code for 'dime bags')" -

freezer818

"Sod off." -

puredeadthingy

S is for Super! Sic semper syrianis and stuff. S is also for quiz theme, because S is for September, and that's all we really need to make a theme. Spectacular, so say we all!

S is also for sugar, which is tasty. Mmmm, sugar.

Thanks for playing, and see you tomorrow!

Rock on!

AL&CV&LL

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Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

i-beckygardens.livejournal.com

one- not bad since I was busy fleeing the "storm of the century" hah

From:

chaosvizier.livejournal.com

Glad to hear you're ok... we like our quizlings safe and sound and unflooded!

From:

captainsblog.livejournal.com

I can't believe nobody answered "Afro" for #3.

From:

chaosvizier.livejournal.com

Surprisingly subtle. We are a legion of the obvious.

From:

reticent-lass.livejournal.com

"Some slimy slugs shipped salt sacks. Sadly, salt scours slugs, so some suffered sickeningly, shrinking, shriveling." --woap

An easy way for my mother to get rid of me for twnety minutes used to be to hand me the saltshaker and shoo me outside. I would hunt down and assassinate every snail and slug I came across just to watch them sizzle.

(You had us at "Screw Scully". -AL&CV)

Also, y'all are PIGS. She wasn't even that hot... Did you ever watch Jessica Alba in Dark Angel? DAYum.

From:

chaosvizier.livejournal.com

Scully was definitely hot. Plus, she was all smart and sciency. Science makes folks hotter.

I'll give props to Jessica Alba, but she's too pimped out. Scully was much better. ;-)