ljdq | LJ Daily Answers: 11 June 2007

chaosvizier.livejournal.com posting in

And in the line of Themes That Are Really Obvious, we'll start with this week's classic, "North".

1. Fawn Hall shredded documents for which of President Reagan's military advisers?

"I do not recall that incident. " -

liliana76,

the_misha

"Is she the one who got a boob job, posed naked in Playboy and sleezed all over Sam Kinison? I can't keep all those 80's scandals straight." -

kenshardik

(I thought that was Gary Hart's pet hobag. -CV)

"Wait, they had paper shredders in the Reagan era? What, were they made of stone and powered by an allosaur on a treadmill?" -

skfromstamford

"I was reading the question, and first, I thought 'ZOMG! THEY TOOK HIS SECRET JELLY BEAN STASH! Nooooooo' but then I remembered that jelly beans aren't allowed in the military. Silly me." -

fictionalsolace

"Fawn Hall makes me think of Beowulf." -

allie_the_neko

(...an interesting leap there. -CV)

"Waas he the one in Annie, cause that one's always been my favourite president, he's even cooler than JFK who lost a navy ship and had sex with Marilyn Monroe. Hear that politicians, Want my vote, help a cute orphan." -

niroby

"A college roommate's father worked with Hall and Ollie North. The stories this guy told about her stupidity and his willingness to take the fall for the Administration was scarier than any damn horror movie you can think of. " -

southbucki

"'That's quite a mess you got us into this time Ronnie'
'I'm Sorry, Ollie....'" -

lanzaned

"Arnold Schwarzenegger, who co-starred with Reagan in the movie 'Partial Recall'. " -

i_calql8

"Ollie Ollie Oxen Free. What the fuck is that supposed to mean? It's crypto-gibberish masquerading as mere nonsense!" -

etcet

"Is it just me, or does he have the same oversized-eared-monkey-caught-in-headlights look as George Dumbya Bush? I think they're evil clones." -

deza

(You're spot on there. -CV)

Correct Answer: Oliver North

2. Name that movie!
"That's funny, that plane's dustin' crops where there ain't no crops."

"Don't know, but it obviously starred Dustin Hoffman. Aharharhar!" -

david_deacon

(HATE! -AL)

"Paddle Faster I Hear Banjo Music" -

sestree

"High Anxiety" -

wiredwizard &

silent_sybil

"You forgot to finish the quote: "Hey, is that Randy Quaid at the controls?" " -

tweeti

""The Last Moments of John F. Kennedy Jr." which didn't screen well, therefore never made it to television. " -

rhiannonjk

"North by Northwest? I am totally feeling around in the dark here (and hoping I accidentally find boob. I mean, the right answer) and that's the only movie I can think of cause it's got north in the title and some dude being attacked by an evil plane..." -

lyme

"What's a crop? " -

i_calql8
"What is 'dusting crops' exactly? And why is it funny?" -

shadowkeeper

(Cropdusting means using a plane to spread some powdered substance, such as an insecticide, on a field using an airplane. Cropdusting can also mean farting while quickly moving through a public space. -AL)

(You tell us if any of that is funny. -CV)

"337.5 degrees" -

blindgeoff

(Geek! -AL)

(Of the week! -LL)

(-1! -CV)

"I'm gonna guess North by Northwest just because the only scene from the movie I've ever seen involves a bi-plane trying to run over a guy. You gotta wonder how often that happens in real life." -

whiski_sour

"According to today's crossword puzzle, The Opposite of South by Southeast." -

illogicalvulcan

Correct Answer: North By Northwest

3. Fargo is the largest city in which U.S. State?

Fargo North, Decoder references: 2. Now that's OLD school.

"I wish I could think of a good joke. But North Dakota isn't funny, it really isn't. " -

undeadgoat

(I was hoping that at least one Quizling would be from North Dakota, & would give us a nice, long-winded answer detailing the varied & startling wonders to be found in their state. But alas, no one fulfilled this wish of mine. -AL)

"You know, every time I tell people I was born in Fargo, they're like 'Wait, that's a real city?' 'Of course it's a real city! Haven't you people ever heard of North Dakota?' And then I have to relive the first three frozen winters of my life. Oh, for a world where snow is piled higher than my head for six months out of the year. There is no spring in Fargo. There's just snow and slightly less snow. And maybe occasionally puddles.
No wonder my parents moved." -

kadharonon

"It maybe the largest city there... but EVERYONE knows the cultural capitol of North Dakota is Hoople!" -

blindgeoff

(Man, that's obscure. -AL)

"He's not the President of the United States! He's a junior senator from North Dakota where nobody lives, 'cause it's too cold and they don't have a major sports franchise!!" -

illogicalvulcan

(+1, West Wing. Oooh, +2, for a directional in the title of the show you're quoting. Now that's good themework. -AL)

"Fargo's a city? I thought it was just a film. " -

crystalcazzie

(sigh. – CV&AL&LL)

"...I saw that movie with what'shisface in the woodchipper and it doesn't snow like that in North Carolina, which, by the way, I can never distinguish from South Carolina." -

lyme

(References to woodchippers: 22. -CV)

"One of those places we should just give to Canada. " -

antinomic

"...the Canada-US border guard at night along there is a pylon." -

cmseward

"The state beverage of North Dakota is milk. The state beverage of West Virginia is moonshine, I KID YOU NOT." -

ataralas

"Isn't Fargo roughly the size of my backyard? And it's the largest city in North Dakota? I suddenly have a craving for conquering that state." -

woap

Correct Answer: North Dakota

4. Marvel Comics' Jean-Paul Beaubier is better known as which Canadian superhero?

"Hehehe, you said Boob." -

kokopellinelli

(Seriously, how do I never see this coming? -CV)

"...You're going to get so much people going LOL CANADIAN SUPERHERO at this. " -

dracothelizard

"Dudley Do-Right. Oh, wait, Canadian superhero. Um, yeah, no." -

liliana76

"Beaverman!" -

woap

"The Maple Commando -- his superpower is to sap the strength from bad guys." -

fizrep

"The Great Northern Maple Leaf. Able to run as fast as syrup in January! Dispenses free health care to all! Bilingual! Operates out of The Igloo of Solitude!" -

pirho_maniac

"If my high school French serves me, his last name translates to either 'good beer' or 'good bed', which suits a gay superhero... " -

miladygrey

"Back Bacon Man! " -

drbear

"Northman, who always points to magnetic north due to his overuse of Viagra." -

david_deacon

"Northstar! One of the first homosexual superheroes. But to be honest, I've had my doubts about Captain Britain for a looooong time. " -

futuristicplans

(Meggan was just a front, he was all over the fuzzy blue elf. – LL)

"Northstar, ze Gay Suparero avec ze Outrageous Accent, you silly English types! " -

kenshardik

"Bob and/or Doug Mackenzie. " -

palapalooza

"Canada has only two heroes, Terence and Philip" -

lanzaned

"The Northstar. But since I want to sound poetically scientific (and I wanna piss people off), I shall nickname him Polaris." -

tickle_smoosh

(Alas, Marvel had already created a superheroine named Polaris. She chilled with the X-Men because she was doin' the mutant mattress mambo with Cyclops' brother. -CV)

(You should get the Geek Of The Week award for knowing that. Geek. -AL)

Correct Answer: Northstar

5. Which half of a motherboard's core logic chipset is sometimes referred to as the Memory Controller Hub?

"Hey! Did you see TRON?? What a cool movie." -

writersblock_va

"Didn't Keanu Reeves have one of those in his head in that goddawful movie? " -

fmh

(+1, Johnny Mnemonic. Well, ok, just +0.5. -CV)

"You speak Geek. One moment while I bring on the Pesians." -

ntlespino

"The what now? The Memory Controller Hub is clearly some sort of future mind control thing in a bad science fiction movie. 'Hurry, we must blow up the Memory Controller Hub before it activates and turns us into mindless automatons!' 'Oh, irony! It is our too clever AIs who have built the MCH to end our unpredicable, random, all too human behaviour!' It practically writes itself! " -

paradoxhorizon

"I think that the second best superpower (after being able to suspend quantum mechanics in a localized region of space) would be being the Memory Controller. It'd be all, 'Bow before me, or I'll remove every happy memory you ever had! MWAHAHAHAH!'" -

ataralas

"Is this the chipset that holds all your porn and pirated music? " -

killabee886

"I'm not sure specifically but it did tell me to clean up my room and do the chores before I went out." -

elaran

"Uh, the sparkly part? " -

joscelin

"Medulla oblongata?" -

palapaloozaa

"Does this answer change depending on whether we point our laptops at the sun or something?" -

nakedblueninja

"There's stuff in my computer. I'm convinced it's run by magic. Please don't try to change my beliefs." -

pirho_maniac

"Do motherboards have a north? How do you orient them? Not with a magnet, obviously." -

rikchik

"Back in the Pentium / Pentium II days, there was also cache installed on the mainboard's northbridge, before it migrated to the CPU itself, which had a trememdous impact on a system's performance." -

etcet

(He said more, but it was all gibberish and gobbledygook, so instead we'll use the

spiffington Award for Total Gibberish. -CV)

Correct Answer: North Bridge

(For the record, only 5 geeks got this one. And I think 2 of them cheated. -CV)

6. So, in what direction is your life going this week?

"South. Decidely South. And not in a good way like in a 'love in an Elevator' kind of south way. :( " -

writersblock_va

(Most of the rest of you just went Due South. -CV)

"Well, the shit hit the fan, so it's going in all directions. " -

lilianan76

"No cardinal direction expresses 'sitting in the middle sucking on a bottle of cough syrup', so I'll just say 'fnorth'." -

woap

"Any which way but loose." -

b_hulsmans

"From 'suck' to 'blow.'" -

etcet

(+1, Spaceballs. -CV)

"To Pismo Beach, as long as I remember to take that left turn at Albuquerque." -

umbralcorax

(Consequences, shmonsequences, as long as I'm rich. -CV)

"I have six exams this week. For five of them, no textbook was available for the entire course, so I'm attempting to teach myself using age-old library resources. I WISH I COULD BE TEN AGAIN." -

puredeadthingy

"Let me tell you, Internets. Let me tell you what direction my life is going. I woke up at 2pm this morning. My boyfriend of three years dumped me the night before prom because he was "in love" with my best friend. I've been wearing the same sweatpants for three days. I injured my back mowing the lawn this morning. I spent 20 minutes trying to fix a stubborn lightswitch, and the only social engagements I have this week involve color guard and marching band. Now let me ask you - what direction do you think my life is going?" -

72degrees

(You're in the marching band? COOL!! – LL)

(I think you missed a few of the other points here... -CV)

"Sort of like someone opened it up to check on it and and didnt quite put the lid back on the way it was, you know like when you try to put the lid back on a jar and the threads don't line up? Yeah. That's it." -

herm42

"Towards the beer. Which I now have as my friend bought me some Molson in London. Woo!" -

crystalcazzie

"Life? Don't talk to me about life." -

sskipstress

"Everything's coming up Milhouse!" -

squeegibo

"A jump to the left, and a jump to the right." -

piemur

"Well, I'm in the last week of the term and by the time the answers come out it will be finals week. I have two 8 a.m. finals, my wife to murder and Gulider to frame for it; I'm swamped." -

killabee886

"I'm not sure where I'm going right now... and could someone tell me why I'm in this handbasket?" -

blindgeoff

"You are standing in the Great Lawn in Central Park. It is a beautiful sunny Sunday. There are people sunbathing and children playing. You are hungover.
> n
You are now in the North Fields on the Great Lawn. There are people playing softball here.
> play softball
You join the softball game.
> score
Your team is up 5-2. You have hit the ball over the heads of the male folks in the outfield, twice. You gloat.
Your phone rings.
> answer phone
Your boss is calling. The database has crashed.
> curse boss
Your boss says to locate a computer and fix the system.
You leave Central Park.
You are likely to be eaten by a grue." -

illogicalvulcan

(+1, Zork. -CV)

And there you have it. Tune in for the next three weeks when you should be able to predict the themes with minimal difficulty. And that means you'll get all the right answers. And then you'll be challenged because Oh Noes Right Answers Make The Funny Go Away! Live up to the challenge! Face your inner demons, or I'll summon some fresh ones for you.

Once again, thanks for playing, good job all, tune in tomorrow for more, eat your veggies, and be excellent to each other.

Rock On!

AL&CV&LL