LJDQ Answers, 29 October 2004

[angledge.livejournal.com]

What holiday is coming up in just two days, one asks?

"Must be Easter." - sskipstress
"Let me guess ... the theme is ... Christmas?" - nihilistbear
"The theme is ... that time of year when all your loved ones get ripped to shreds ... So ... Christmas, then?" - jacy_

(I'm never going to Christmas at YOUR house, no matter what pudding you're serving. -AL)

"I cannot figure this out. What the hell does Orson Welles, Michael Myers, Some stupid Celtic Summer's End holiday, a cacked head of government, an Aztec holidayitlan, and my preferences on costume's have anything to do with each other?" - dancingsaracen

Yes, Halloween is here! The time to dress silly and go around and beg for candy. Or, if you're like me, beat up kids and take their candy, because it's easier and more fun. But there's no time for that this weekend, so instead we've got this quiz, now complete with answers. Share and enjoy!

1. Twas the night before Halloween, and all through the land, not a creature was stirring, except the millions of panicked radio listeners who believed that America was being invaded by Martians in 1938. Who narrated this famous deception, and what book had he adapted for that broadcast?

"I'm sorry, but my Martian masters will not allow me to answer this." - vanbrosia

([Sure we will!] - vanbrosia's Martian Masters, translated from original Barsoomian)

"I might well be monitoring these transmissions *from* Mars for all I know about '30's culture." - marcyleecorgan

"It should have been Tim Curry. And he should have dressed up in his RHPS garb while he did it because I would have found that hilarious." - _oh_my_my

(I find it hilarious that you're considering outfits for a radio announcer. -AL)

"can I vote that the narrator should have been jamie lee curtis, if it wasn't?" - calankh

(Democracy gives you the right to vote for whomever you wish. Even if you're dead wrong. -CV)

"It should have been narrated by James Earl Jones. Just because everything should be narrated by James Earl Jones. The man could narrate an ad for llama pellets and I'd want to buy it. If there's a movie about my life, I want James Earl Jones to narrate it. Actually, I want him to narrate my life, period. Wouldn't that be cool?" - portkey

(I think that could get old:

James Earl Jones voiceover: THE MORNING BEGAN LIKE MOST OTHER MORNINGS FOR portkey, WITH A BOWL OF CHEERIOS, A GLASS OF ORANGE JUICE, AND A CENTRUM MULTIVITAMIN. AFTER BREAKFAST, portkey GOT DRESSED, CHOOSING FOR TODAY'S ATTIRE ... HEY, IS ANYONE ELSE GETTING BORED WITH THIS YET?

Everyone: zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ...

-AL)

"It no doubt left many people feeling extremely stupid, especially those in Grover's Mill, NJ, the supposed site of the alien landing. Many people actually fled the area, believing that the alien attack was real. Well, don't look at me, this is South Jersey. But what probably made them feel even dumber after finding out the truth was that many of them likely fled to Pennsylvania of all places. One cool thing about the whole situation was that after Welles had heard that the broadcast was causing a panic, he excitedly continued on. That's my kind of fuckin' guy." -djdysfunction

"Is this the point to note that I expect the American election results when they are broadcast will have much the same effect?" - verdandiweaves

(The major difference will be that instead of New Jerseyans fleeing to Pennsylvania, you will see American liberals fleeing to Canada. Or, in my case, back to Scotland. -AL)

"In a related story, I eavesdropped on a number of conversations as I walked out of the movie theater after seeing "The Blair Witch Project," and a large number of people firmly believed that it was a real documentary. The conclusion? 1938 + 66 years = people are still stupid." - b7cy

(Administrations come & admininstrations go, but stupidity is forever. -AL)

"Don't know who adapted it, but the book was The War of the Worlds, by H.G. Wells. I stupidly picked this book for a sixth grade project, thinking naively that it was about an alien invasion, it had to be interesting, right? Wrong. Possibly one of the most boring books I've ever read. Don't know how you did it, H.G. Wells, but I salute you: you're the only author I've read who can make an alien invasion boring." - sennical

"'War of the Worlds'. And I can't remember who did it. Arthur C. Clarke? Something like that. Dick Clark? He's certainly old enough. Stephen King? William Shatner? (ok, maybe not Shatner, otherwise it would be called 'War. Of the. Worlds.') - jelymo

"That was Orson Welles and H. G. Wells. And I think I've been doing too much chemistry homework because I just caught myself thinking of their last names as enantiomers of each other. *freaks out*" - moocow1985

(Everyone, give a warm welcome and a -1 to our new Geek Of The Week. -CV)

"I don't know, but I think he's working for the current American government. I mean, who can't see them pulling this? 'Oh noes, America is in danger of a Martian attack! We are now upping the terrorism alert to 'orange'. If you spot someone acting strangely, perhaps babbling in an unknown language, or showing an unhealthy interest in being taken to your leader, please report them to the FBI. Especially if they have green skin. Not that we're profiling or anything, because that would be unconstitutional. In related news, studies have shown that Martian death rays can be deflected by duct taping garbage bags over your windows.'" - snowfox090

Correct Answer: Orson Welles narrated an adaptation of H.G. Wells' The War Of The Worlds.

"Not nearly as stirring a performance, however, as his performance as Unicron in the Transformers movie" - jmspencer

"That would be the infamous Orson Welles/Mercury Theatre adaptation of The Joy of Sex. Because really, wouldn't you be scared shitless to hear Unicron instructing you how to give proper head?" - gruyere

(YES. -AL&CV)


2. In the "Halloween" series of slasher films, what is the name of Jamie Lee Curtis's character's brother?

"You people keep asking questions I don't know the answer to! Is this some sort of conspiracy?" - purple_roses

(Yes. -CV)

(No. -AL)

(Yes, I meant no. -CV)

(No, you meant yes. -AL)

(Third base! -AL&CV)

"Lonestar, and he doesn't handle his schwartz anywhere near as well as I do." - sskipstress

(As well as you handle Lonestar's schwartz, or as well as you handle your own? ... no, on second thought, never mind. -CV)

"Ah you mean the fucked up dude with the hockey mask and the chainsaw??" - seolta

(I do believe you need to straighten out your horror characters somewhat. -CV)

"Isn't the evil twin brother's name always Skippy?" - drewbeartx

"Dude...Jamie Lee Curtis was HOT back then....wait, what was the question?" - doomgirl

(The question is now moot. -CV)

"Lo Pan" - djdysfunction

(Always a correct answer in my book. -CV)

"Wait, I thought Jamie Lee Curtis has a Y chromosome. Doesn't that make her her own brother? I'm confused." - b7cy
"Actually, Jamie Lee Curtis, being a hermaphrodite, is actually her own brother." - krick

(Both of you also have Y chromosomes. Does that make you your own brother? -AL)

"Wears a mask, right? Kinda scary with a knife? Last I heard he moved to an opera house in Paris and now won't quit murdering the neighbors with his rendition of 'Music of the Night'." - bunnyfer

"Michael?" - alyaat, geni91782

(Halfway there... -CV)

"Michael Moore!" - velvetangel, permogod

"According to the naming convention of several small tribes in southeast Indonesia, familial relationships are declared by syllabic structure of nomenclature, so Billy Ray Cyrus and Billy Bob Thornton could both be argued as being Jamie Lee Curtis' brothers. Oh, wait. You're looking for the brother of her CHARACTER. That would be the most original Eminem, Michael Myers." - mrbigsteve

"Michael Myers. But, we didn't find that out until the second movie. In the first movie, we're all like "YAY! RANDOM NUTJOB IN A WILLIAM SHATNER MASK STABBING STUPID TEENAGERS!" And, then the second movie came out and the connection was made and then we all groaned knowing that it would only lead to incest by the sixth film." - whiski_sour

"I don't know, but Michael Meyers (sp?) was the killer. Hey, wait, didn't he turn out to be her brother at some point?" - yunami

"When I was older I vowed that I would never fear William Shatner again." - xgreenjudasx

Correct Answer: Michael Myers

"Michael Myers. Not to be confused with Mike Myers. They're both axe murderers, though." - gruyere

(I don't think Mike Myers was the axe murderer in that movie. -CV)

"Michael Meyers. For the longest time, I was afraid of 'Wayne's World'." - sargiegirl76

(As are all good people. -CV)

"Michael Myers. Yeah baby! I'm going on a groovey killing spree man. Does it make you horny baby?" - richcsigs


3. All Hallow's Eve was celebrated in Celtic tradition as "Summer's End". What was the Celtic name for that holiday?

"'Damn I'm glad it's not so fucking hot anymore'. Dude - I live in Texas - we only have two seasons: Freaking Hot and Freaking Cold." - doomgirl

"Drunken Fighting Day. Interesting note: All Celtic holidays are officially known as 'Drunken Fighting Day.' Just another wacky tradition used by those oh-so-very-drunk Irish. Hey, I read 'Angela's Ashes.' I know about those Irish and their drinking." - b7cy

"I think it should be called "Drinkin' Day". Actually, I think all days should be called that." - bummerfly

(The implication here is that bummerfly is Irish. -AL)

"Sow wain are the witches going to dance nekkid??" - perkyczarlet

(Well, I don't know. Let's find out. -AL)

"SAMHAIN! SAMHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN! *dances around nekkid*" - marcyleecorgan

(Looks like the answer to perkyczarlet's question is "right now". -CV)

"Samhainn or Samhuinn. I don't think I spelled it right, but I do know the word apparently held special significance in the Halloween films because it made an appearance on a black board in the fourth film. Looking back, it was probably some sort of warning to the incest that was to come in film six." - whiski_sour

"Samwise." - gruyere

"That would be the slog-through-the-snowdrifts-for-candy festival." - 3jane

(According to 3jane's user info, she is from Saskatoon, Saskatchewan, so it's possible that the Celts in this area used this name for the festival. Full credit. -AL)

"Samhain. Don't ask about how to pronounce it as that seems to vary from person to person." - purple_roses

(Let's see what the other Quizlings have to say on this matter. -AL)

"pronounced Sow-en" - _lucy_, m31andy
"pronounced 'sow-een'" - yunami
"And how they get "Sow-in" out of "Sam-hayn" is beyond me." - velvetangel
"Samhain... pronounced 'Sah-win', or, if you're a mallgoth, 'Sam-hane'. In which case I will hit you with a clue-by-four." - jmspencer
"Samhain. But pronounced "soo-een" in Gaelic. Because pronouncing a word like it looks just... doesn't make sense." - rhiannon3j
"Or Samhain, which is appearently prounced sow-in. Or at least thats what my pagan friends try to tell me. I don't really believe them. I mean look at the word. I'd personally pronounce it sam-hain. But thats just me." - naturalredhead

(Ever noticed how some words in English have a "ph" in them that is pronounced like "f"? That comes from Gaelic, folks. Another Gaelic letter combination is "mh", which is pronounced like a "w". And now you know! -AL)

"Sam Hane's Pumpkin Emporium clearance sale day." - dancingsaracen

"Summers' End, beeyotch! Get with the baby making! We have a fertility festival coming up, and you know those damned Christians are going to subvert it, too. Enjoy it while it lasts because soon there will be no baby making there will be LENT! MWAH HA HA HA!!!" - nihilistbear

"Frayzen mey gluttesoff. In Glasgow at least." - alyaat

"Samhain. Check this out, the local group of bronze age reinactors in the sca throw a big old Samhain bash every year, and they construct their very own wicker man to burn. When I went two years ago the matrons of the camp decided that the giant whicker man needed a giant whicker whang. No problem by me. 15 feet of sheer whicker manliness. But then they coverd the giant whicker whang with bacon. And then they set it on fire. It was one of those 'Life IS beautiful' moments watching that 15 foot whicker whang burn, and also watching every guy's mouth begin to water because they smell bacon, and that triggers the whole 'I smell BACON! Where is it?!?? Where IS IT?!?! Is it in that bag? I don't know, I CAN'T REEEEEEEAD!' instinct. Good times." - xgreenjudasx

(I give this story a -1 because whangs and wicker should never mix. Not even with bacon. Never. -CV)

"Beltane. I know this because of Tamora Pierce books. I am such a geek." - seregwen

(Alas, not geeky enough. Beltane's the other holiday. -CV)

"I don't know, but the people who pronounce celtic it cell-tic piss me off. it's a hard c, like a k. kel-tic. celtic. not hard." - calankh

(Unless you're talking about the Boston's basketball theam, the Celtics, or Celtic, one of Glasgow's football/soccer teams. The the "c" is soft in sports for some reason. -AL)

(The ones who really honk me off are the ones who pronounce both c's soft. Seltisses? WTF? -CV)

Correct Answer: Samhain


4. Which head of government was assassinated by her own bodyguards on Halloween Day, 1984?

"I look forward to the answer on this one. Must have had an interesting life." - purple_roses

(She did have an interesting life. Up until the last few minutes. -CV)

"Margaret Thatcher." - Several of you. One can feel the anti-British sentiment oozing from your collective pores.

"Killed by her own bodygaurds?!? That's what she gets for going through a temp agency." - jacesan

"This goes to show why you shouldn't have zombies for bodyguards. Their flesh-lust will overcome their bodyguard sensibilities every time." - perkyczarlet

(You should all keep this valuable advice in mind next time you're hiring bodyguards. -AL)

"If she was just a head, wouldn't she already be dead, saving her bodyguards a lot of effort?" - mrbigsteve

(Bodyguards aren't always hired for their big juicy brains. -CV)

"Whitney Houston." - kenshardik, krick, naturalredhead

(We could only hope. -CV)

(+1, oblique reference to a craptastic movie, The Bodyguard. -AL)

"Imelda Marcos. Apparently they were still pissed about having to wear the same shoes for three decades while she scarfed up every pair on the Island." - vagablonde

"Imelda "And I Would Buy 5,000 Shoes, And I Would Buy 5,000 More, Just To Be The One Who Bought 10,000 Shoes But Didn't Feed The Poor" Marcos" - drewbeartx

(+1 for butchering that annoying Proclaimers song. -AL)

"Sally Skellington, co-ruler of Halloween Town and wife of the late Jack Skellington, was killed in a coup by her bodyguards Lock, Shock, and Barrel." - jmspencer

(+1, The Nightmare Before Christmas. -CV)

"Julia Caesar. She didn't fear the ires of October!" - vanbrosia

(Presumably you meant the ides of October, but perhaps you meant that she should have feared the rage of an angry October. For some reason. -AL)

"I don't know, but it sounds like a good idea." -jelymo

(You definitely want to follow the link in the next answer. -AL)

"Any answer I can give to that will only bring the Secret Service to my door." - sasscat

"The Wicked Witch of the West. I know, Dorothy was the one who tossed the water. But there always seemed to be something wrong with those monkeys... " - snowfox090

"Dude, what an awesome reason to haunt those sons-a-bitches." - _lucy_

"Selena! Somehow, I think that's wrong and right at the same time." - _oh_my_my

(That part of your answer where you said you were wrong? That part was right. -AL)

"I want to say Indira Ghandi or Golda Meir, but that could be because they're the only two female heads of State I know besides the Queen and Margaret Thatcher. So I'm probably wrong. DAMN YOU PUBLIC EDUCATION!" - nihilistbear

(There have been several. But we'll go into political history another day. -CV)

"I was a year old. How can you expect me to remember?" - yueni

(Well, by my calculation, that means you're 21 about now. I expect you to go to a pub, get yourself a drink, and turn on the History Channel. I find that a well-flavored gin really gets the noggin working. -CV)

"Erm... well, America doesn't HAVE female heads of government, so we can scratch THAT off the list (grumble, grumble). Margaret Thatcher is still alive, so's the Indonesian woman who just got not-reelected. Oh, wait! I think Ghandi's wife took over after him in India and was assassinated by her body guards. What was her name? Indira? Or was that his daughter? Eh, I give up. Unless I'm right, in which case: Go me! Way to pull an answer out of my ass!" - marasca

(You got the answer right, even if your chain of thought was a little flawed. Mahatma & Indira were not related. -AL)

(That was more of a keychain of thought- small, not entirely well-connected, but somehow useful, and we don't know why. -CV)

"Lady Ghandi. Little known DC fact, the bar with over 15,000 beers from around the world is just off Embassy Row, one block from a statue of M. Ghandi outside of the Indian Embassy. No matter how drunk I am, I can find that bar, although sometimes I think I can see a glint of disapproving sadness in Ghandi's eyes as I gracefully fall over trying to pee." - xgreenjudasx

Correct Answer: Indira Gandhi

"Oooh, a woman betrayed. Have they made it into a movie yet?" - portkey

(If they did, it would be playing on the Lifetime channel about five times a week now. -CV)


5. Which Mexican holiday period was moved from the Aztec month of Miccailhuitontli and is dedicated to children and the dead (preferably not at the same time)?

"That's not a month, that's a cat walking across the keyboard." - moocow1985

"AY! LA CHUPACABRA!" - djdysfunction

"Insert your own inappropriate Michael Jackson joke here." - sasscat

"It probably originated in Silent Hill, though. What is it with that place and creepy dead kids? They must buy in bulk. In every single game there's at least one creepy kid and a bunch of dead things controlled by evil forces. It's like being on the set of Sesame Street, only with entrails." - snowfox090

"'Kill the brats before they get any bigger.' At least, that would be my dream holiday ::hates on small children::" - nihilistbear

(You may share my hate. -CV)

"The Feast of No Whining. You kids, quit it. You dead corpses and banshees, same goes for you." - perkyczarlet

(You kids who are corpses especially. We hate you all. -CV)

"Why does this remind me of Stephen King's 'Pet Cemetery" where the kid rises from the dead. Brrr..." - alyaat

"People in paper mache skeleton outfits: not spooky
Meowing wight children: very spooky" - fizrep

(Agreed. Anyone who thinks otherwise can go see The Grudge or its original counterpart Ju-On. -CV)

"Cinco de Mayo, I believe. Which, now that I think about it, sounds like a condiment being poured down a drain." - portkey

"Cinco de Mayo, burritos for everyone! You too, dead Grandma!" - _lucy_

"Cinco de Mayo (thereject's birthday)" - permogod

(Mine too. It's hard work being the Spirit of the Mexican Revolution. -CV)

"Gotta love those little sugar skulls!" - purple_roses
"Yay for chocolate skulls!" - sargiegirl76

(Those things are nothing but zombie propaganda, recruiting children to the ranks of the undead by teaching them to associate "sucking on skulls" with "sustenance". -AL)

"Shaun of the Muerta. I really paid more attention to the cute guy in my spanish class than the actual spanish." - marcyleecorgan

"Again illustrating my ignorance of most foreign cultures, I haven't a clue. However, I look forward to finding out the answer later this week. (It's more entertaining reading stuff here than looking it up on Google, anyway.)" - velvetangel

(*checks user info* Yep, an American. Well, add that to the LJDQ's list of attributes: "Reduces American ignorance concerning the rest of the world." We're all about the learnin' here. -AL)

"Necrophiliac's Day. Personally, I'm all for necrophilia. My partners never complain." - silent_r_infork

"So those aliens on Babylon 5 were Mexican?" - kenshardik

(Yeah, who knew that they would evolve so strongly over the next 300 years? I'm as surprised as you... And, for quoting B5, you were this close to being Geek Of The Week. -CV)

"Actually, that holiday period was stolen by Cortez in 1519 and given as a gift to Queen Isabella, who dedicated it November 1st to the Spanish Inquisition and to 'all the little people who helped make it possible.'" - bunnyfer

"Dia De Los Muertos - means 'Days of the Dead'. This answer is dedicated to the film Once Upon a Time in Mexico, without which I would not know the answer to the question." - m31andy

"El Dia de Los Muertos, or 'Holy Shit, zombies are attacking! Let them eat the children first!' Day." - closs

Correct Answer: Día de los Muertos

"Dia de los Muertos Niños" - _oh_my_my
"Día de los niños muertos" - jmspencer

(jmspencer, what did I tell you about copying off other Quizlings' papers? See me after class for detention. -AL)


6. What would your ideal Halloween costume be?

"My husband and I would like to dress up as Bender and Leela from Futurama." - bummerfly

(Do you by chance have only one eye? -CV)

"I'm actually going as Cassidy from Preacher this year, so that is my ideal costume. Yeh bollicks." - silent_r_infork

"Sting" - jelymo

(Cheeky. -AL&CV)

"A red devil bikini top, a bin-Laden face mask, devil horns and a kilt. Of course, in Scottish fashion men don't wear undies with kilts, and since I'm not a man, perhaps one of those toy detachable...er... 'male parts' to go under the costume. Goes well with the bikini top when one dances on the speakers, no? SURPRISE!" - alyaat

"The Batsuit - with the Batbelt and keys to the Batmobile!!" - vagablonde

"A ninja/clown. The kids would be all unsuspecting, thinking the clown is gonna twist a balloon for them or something and POW...I'll steal their candy. Except ninjas don't eat candy, they kill people." - jacesan

(Sometimes clowns kill people, too. Right, whiski_sour? -AL)

"A clown. That pretty much scares everyone.
" - whiski_sour

"In regards to last week's quiz, in which I was brutally attacked for being good in bed...Only one person has ever been hospitalized. I guess I should be a heart surgeon." - _lucy_

"my roomate had a picture of the weirdest costume on her board; its a woman dressed as a giant hand and a man as a (moderately sized if you ask me) penis. You know, a hand... and a penis. Heh. Just thought I'd share." - rhiannon3j

"Let's just say it involves a big cloak and lots of intimidation." - verdandiweaves

(Would it be a holocaust cloak? -CV)

(+1 to CV, The Princess Bride. -AL)

"A psychotic - they look like everyone else." - miwsehat

(That's a comforting observation, thanks. -AL)

"I don't care, as long as I get candy." - nightleo

"My ideal Halloween costume is the one that gets me the most treats." - sskipstress

"" - djdysfunction

"someday I will make my own Jedi robe and lightsaber. a jedi always makes her own lightsaber." - calankh

(This is why AL and I embraced the Dark Side. The Sith don't have to make shit; they just beat up some Jedi and take their lightsaber. Quicker, easier, the Dark Side is, yeeeeeessss... -Darth CV)

"A shape-shifter. Where I could actually shift my shape." - perkyczarlet

"I wore it last year. It was called 'shaving accident victim.'
" - b7cy

"Harry Potter's Invisibility Cloak. Of course, that'd mean a lot less candy!" - d4b

"I'm going to be a conspiricy theoryist! Because I'll get to wear a hat made out of tin foil." - moocow1985

"A giant mecha suit. Hey, it's a costume. And no one would dare to egg my car." - vanbrosia

"I live in Alabama, so I'm considering going trick-or-treating as John Kerry or Howard Dean, just to see how many doors I get slammed on my face." - sennical

(I'm not sure if I should commend your bravery or mock your stupidity. Good luck, either way. Please submite an after-action report. -AL)

(... if you survive. -CV)

"John Kerry. Scare the little children and take their candy." - plaidwater

(I think a big bobblehead Kerry would actually be quite frightening. The chin ... THE CHIN! -CV)

"Here is mine for this year. I just don't look as porn.
" - deinemuse

"Lined with thousand dollar bills" - lots42
"A suit of solid-gold plate armor, soldered together with pure silver and inlaid with flawless precious gems. I wouldn't wear the damn heavy thing, but imagine the resale value!" - drewbeartx

(Now there are some costumes I'd happily relieve someone of. -CV)

"This year? A ghost costume. And I mean a real ghost outfit. One where I was all noncorporeal and shit. But it would have to have holes in it. So I could go around saying, 'ooooooooooo holy ghost.'" - dancingsaracen

"chaosvizier, of course. Makes it that much easier to sneak into functions and mack on Colin Powell's daughter." - mrbigsteve

(To explain this, I suppose I should link back to this entry I wrote last year. -CV)

Happy Halloween, everybody! Go out and trick-or-treat safely, brush your teeth after eating all that sweet candy, and drink responsibly. This way you can all make up for me not doing any of the above. Balance, see? And if you want scares, go watch "The Grudge" or rent "The Thing", "The Shining", "The Ring", or some other scary movie. Remember: Children are creepy, especially if they're dead and still moving. Also, zombies. Well, they're not really scary. They're just zombies. More comedic than scary.

Thanks again for playing, and tell your friends about us! We crave human fles- err, we welcome new players gladly!

Rock on,

Ang & Hans.

Comments

ph ->

[angledge.livejournal.com]

... is also a Gaelic characteristic. Look at the surname McPherson, for instance.