LJ Daily Answers: 27 March 2006

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

The end of March is heralded with a theme of threes. Or rather, of triples. If you think April will yield a theme of quads, think again.

1. Stop me if you've heard this one... Celeborn, Mace Windu, and Riddick step into an action movie. Only one of them makes it to the sequel. What bad movie is on our minds?

"Snakes on a plane." - all too many of you

"I'm guessing it's not 'The Three Amigos.'" - david_deacon

"No, no, no, it's the SEQUEL that is a horrible abomination on the face that is all and pure." - lots42

"We should all carry Mace Windu in our pockets." - ecarrotsushi

"Um, I think Celeborn was an Elf...I have no idea who Mace Windu might be." - ophelialaughs

(The second part of this statement reeks of AWESOME. -CV)

"And now a random fact about Vin Diesel: Yelling out 'Earth, Fire, Wind, Water, Heart' will cause Captain Planet to appear. But adding 'Badass' to the end will make Vin Diesel appear instead." - aliaspiral

(For more information on the powers of Vin Diesel, click here. -CV)

"I'd watch Vin Diesel in anything as long as he takes off his shirt. Never let bad taste get in the way of lust." - ginalin

"Does Vin Diesel stay around for a sequel, ever? The films he's prone to choosing are not exactly worthy of this holier-than-god attitude... although I secretly enjoy most of them." - portkey

"Elven motherfucker, do you speak it?!" - fizrep

(+1, Pulp Fiction. -CV)

"Who the peppermint fudge is Celeborn? It sounds like some kind of diet plan. 'Are you ten, twenty, thirty pounds overweight? Have you tried every diet pill and fad ever created? Now there's hope! From the work of a famous celebrity's nutritionist comes Celeborn, the diet plan that will change your life!'" - pewter_alyssum

"'The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe' I remember Samuel L. Jackson was the witch, but I always forget whether Vin was the lion or the wardrobe." - marasca

"Maid In Manhattan? OK, of course it wasn't, but Jesus Christ on a cracker, that film sucked. When J-Lo claimed to be from the block, I think she may well have been referring to the life-sized block of wood she impersonated in this role." - jonem

"CCC. Wait, no, that's not right. III? LLL? I never could get the hang of those Roman numerals. Thank heaven for those Arabs and their crazy new numbering system! I'm going to go drink some Molson's ten ten ten and watch some ten ten ten porn now to forget about all this." - ldy

"Actually, the only reason I watched Triple X (or rather xXx) was the Rammstein concert at the beginning. Mmmmm, sexy angry Germans playing with fire..." - rivetkitten

"Wow, somebody actually watched the second XXX movie. I can't even remember what it was called except it was like, XXX: Somebody did Something." - sitandwait

"XXX.. which.. along with Naked Lunch, has the most misleading title ever...." - tarpo

Correct Answer: xXx (Triple X)



2. Winning the Kentucky Derby, the Preakness Stakes, and the Belmont Stakes in the same year grants which elusive title and trophy?

"" - mcrunner03

"Ever notice how gnocci is suspiciously like monkeys' testicles? Makes you wonder..." - kantiandream

(Your extensive knowledge of both gnocci and monkey's testicles is disturbing, to say the least. Not to mention irrelevant. -CV)

"This isn't the sort of horseplay I'm interested in" - esran

"Do you think any of the horses ever get named Mr. Ed, or is that name retired? You know, like jerseys of famous people, you can't use the numbers anymore. This has always sparked the question: What happens when you run out of numbers? Will they have to start retiring letters? 'Okay, no more people with 'E' in their name.'" - braynstorm

"People only go to horse races to see a jockey crash." - whiski_sour

(Much like NASCAR races. It's only good when someone's car has exploded. -CV)

"'Not Being Eaten By The French'" - lots42
"The Elmer's Cup" - pheltzer, _tumblweed
"'stud fees.'" - jrho
"Doping cheater" - animejosse

"I had a horse. She was too old for the Derby, and also not a Thoroughbred, but really she couldn't win because she was very lazy and didn't see the point in all that running around, and went into heat in inopportune moments as well, rubbing her 1000-pound butt against the nearest fenceposts every time a colt walked by. So I'm gonna say it's the Anna Nicole Smith Classic." - altoidsaddict

"Triple Crown, which is sort of like Royal Crown but not as sticky and with more horse poo." - ophelialaughs

"The Triple Crown. I didn't know horses wore crowns, or is it the jockeys? Do jockeys wear Jockeys, or are they more comfortable in boxers?" - arib

"Ah, the triple crown. Where everybody learned the lesson 'never bet on anything from or around Philadelphia.'" - stormyskies

"The Triple Crown, which for me always brings up images of the victorious horse wearing the old-fashioned papal crown:
" - stephe

"I still haven't figured out how they get crowns to stay on the horse's head. I'm assuming there's some sort of modification around the ears." - deza

"When I was a kid, I had this idea that it was like a supercrown with superpowers and that the winning horse would become a My Little Pony and save the world." - rose_acacia

"Incidentally, the horses that race in the Triple Crown all have to be 3 years old so it fits the category twice over. Good on you." - morganashkevron

(We're lucky like that. -CV)

Correct Answer: The Triple Crown



3. Cointreau and Curacao are examples of which well-distilled orange-flavored liqueur?

"Gin! Um, wait. Triple Gin! Um, wait...oh, forget it." - scifantasy

"Does it taste like orange-flavoured cough syrup?" - vanbrosia

(I'd rather drink shots of this than shots of orange Dayquil, believe me. -CV)

"My glass is neither half empty nor half full... it's just time for another drink." - pheltzer

"Triple salchow, favoured drink of ice skaters everywhere." - jrho

"I've got my spine, I've got my Orange Crush." - hardly_angelic

(+1, R.E.M. -CV)

"*flips a coin, picks Tang over Orange Julius*" - drbear
"Triple Sec. Sec means dry in spanish. Which would make sense if Triple Sec was alcohol in powdered form. Like Tang, but with more drunkeness." - chrysoberyl

(Astronauts do not drink Hard Tang. Well, maybe cosmonauts do. -CV)

"Once, I drank a lot of Sky Blue Vodka and wondered around telling everyone I was under the Sky and I was drinking the Sky and then I peed on a tree." - kapnkaty

"I once had Blue Curaco Pie - it was very nasty." - hthottie

"Liqueur? I don't even know 'er." - krick

(Strangely, krick is the only person who made this joke. -CV)

"I believe that would be Triple Sec, which themommage used to keep on top of the fridge. I say "used to," because one day SOMEONE (aka whitewulf, aka my brother) opened the fridge and managed to knock the triple sec off. We're talking a maybe half-full 3-litre bottle, here. All over the kitchen floor... I don't remember if we kept the dog out of the kitchen until we cleaned it up or not. Damn." - rivetkitten

"Triple sec + gin + grapefruit juice = Gin Citrus, which goes very well with pudding." - deza

(I'll keep that one in mind... -CV)

Correct Answer: Triple Sec



4. What is the bowling term for three strikes in a row?

"I know this, but am afraid to admit I watch bowling on TV and enjoy it." - ginalin

(I would be too. -CV)

"I don't know, because I hate bowling and those fucking slippery sweaty shoes they make you wear. FUCK YOUR SHOES, BOWLING PEOPLE." - vanbrosia

"AFL-CIO having a good week" - zihuatanejo

"I didn't know my last 3 dates had a clinical term... " - tarpo

"somebody else's lane" - wackdaddy

"the only way I can get a strike is if those balloon-thingies were put into the gutters." - alliterator

"you can get three strikes in a row?" - wellowned

(I certainly can't. And judging by most of our answers, neither can the majority of our quizlings. -CV)

"A hat-trick, and it's three wickets, not three 'strikes' :) Although they do talk about a bowler's 'strike rate' (O/W), so it's not far off." - grapefruitzzz

(Oh, you and your wacky foreign sports... -CV)

"Hey, you bowled PORN!" - ataralas

"I gave up bowling for sex - the balls are lighter and I don't have to change shoes." - hardly_angelic

"Trifecta" - pride4u2, wiredwizard

"I thought it was called a Turkey. Why would I think it was called a turkey?" - sitandwait

(Because a) you're right and b) we're trying to trick you. Naughty, isn't it? -CV)

"Turkey, which according to Benjamin Franklin should have been the national bird of the United States. If it were, we'd probably be eating those ugly eagles for Thanksgiving and maybe the guys wouldn't fall asleep in front of the TV while watching those football games." - ecarrotsushi

"Turkey. That pretty much solidifies it as a redneck sport, doesn't it?" - whiski_sour

"The turkeys that are invading my hometown" - arib

Correct Answer: Turkey

"So... if you get nine strikes in a row... do they call that a Turducken?" - pheltzer



5. What is the capital of the Libyan Arab Jamahiriya?

"L, A, and J." - you're all getting -1 and you deserve it.

"Ok, now you're just making up stuff." - b_hulsmans

"Jamahiriya? Is this like the Oddessey or some shit?" - jessicamariek

"Is that an African swallow or a European swallow?" - photosinensis

"I met some Kurds today and they said it was their national celebration day. It's horribly tangential to the question, but I am the sort of sap who buys a newspaper for the film reviews." - grapefruitzzz

"Aunt Jamahiriya, she makes good pancake syrup. MMMM!!!" - badgerbabe

"Did you know that 99% of English words that start with the letters 'al' came from Arabic words via Spain? This is my not-so-subtle way of letting you know I haven't a clue." - morganashkevron

"Sorry, my friends, but I left my map of Africa in my other pants." - syrazemyla

"Triplestan" - arib

"Bebombednextistan?" - lightmagician

(No, we totally did them in the 80's. -CV)

"'Run, Marty! It's THE LIBYANS!'
'Let's see if these bastards can do ninety!'" - pewter_alyssum

(+1, Back To The Future. -CV)

"W has a dartboard with bombing targets instead of numbers. Libya is the unenviable positon between 20 (Tehran) and 18 (California)." - thepikey

"From the halls of Montezuma,
To the shores of Tripoli.
We will fight our country's battles,
In the air, on land, or sea" - 31 of you. Oo-rah, marines.

"To the shores of Tripoli, but not to Mississipoli" - ataralas, flakygoddess, alliterator. And, of course, Tom Lehrer.

"And I just realized that the theme of quiz is 'triple.' Oh god. I bet chaosvizier wrote that last question, given angledge's well known hate of puns." - alliterator

(Your reasoning is sound. Carry on. -CV)

"I'd correct your spelling of 'Jamahiriya', because that's not actually how it's pronounced..." - darksky23

(Issues with the transcription of Arabic-to-Roman alphabets aside, the Libyans here say "Write it this way" and so we do. -CV)

"Tripoli. Is that a tripartite oligarchic version of monopoly or am I just really stoned?" - motown_deserter

(You are SO fucking stoned. -CV)

"Tripoli! Also the name of a restaurant in Brooklyn that I went to as a kid. You could get a table on the prow of the partial ship they had inside! It was the epitomy of cool when I was 8." - marasca

"I used to always get Tripoli and Gallipoli confused. Gallipoli is one of Mel Gibson's first films... back before he was all hairy and wicked crazy. Have you seen the trailer for his new movie? He inserted a quick shot of himself smiling like he wants to eat your soul. The guy has gone to visit Tom Cruise in Crazytown." - miss_katelynne

"Tripoli always sounds like an Italian name to me, which is why it confuses me to be reminded that it's in Africa. Plus I keep thinking that Libya is in the Middle East *beats self on head with world atlas*." - mrpyro

"Top row of a Snellen chart, threefold." - i_calql8

(I'm going hand over the Geek Of The Week award here, because that was tricksy. Free -1 with every pair of glasses. -CV)

Correct Answer: Tripoli



6. We've been getting lots of flak for our categories here... so what subjects would you want to see as quiz themes?

"Yo' mama." - kantiandream

(I never saw it coming. -CV)

"Well, people have always complained about US-centric questions, so how about themes about the various countries quizzers hail from (*coughAustraliacough*)? Then all the Americans will be confused, and everyone else gets to be all smug about it." - vanbrosia

"you gotta have a canadian quiz." - kira_snugz

(No, because that's just like having an American quiz. -CV)

"I'd say 'animals chaosvizier HASN'T eaten', but I'm not sure if you'd get a full quiz out of that one." - thepikey

(I'll get a full belly, though. -CV)

"Do one on crack. Crack is awesome. Unless you are on it then you are a dirty crack head." - nunshavingfun

"'Worst places to look for your cars keys when you're running late!' I'm beast at THAT one, hooboy." - waffle_heiress

"There is a cute picture of a sea turtle being cleaned by reef fish in my weekly calendar. How about a quiz on sea turtles. Because they are cute." - chrysoberyl

"Less food and drink-related questions when I'm stuck at work with neither. I'm still bitter about that." - duncanneko

"Anything, as long as I can answer the damned question." - b_hulsmans

"You've already had ninjas and pirates. In the interest of equality, I demand robots. ROBOTS ARE PEOPLE TOO." - deltashade

"Monkeys! 'Cause really, who doesn't like monkeys?" - setauuta, lbmango, kestrel127

(When the monkey quiz kicks in, you may feel proud. -CV)

"Please to be having more catagories about Brazilian volleyball ass." - fizrep

"Every answer is also the name of a song by a particular band." - rikchik

(Hmmm... I wonder how many Sting songs we can pack here... -CV)

"how about 'not math', 'not geography', and 'not sports'. Oh, and let's not forget 'not Sting'." - krick

"a quiz where the answers are all related to the number 42 could be fun... since after all it is the answer to the ultimate question of the universe. Maybe you can help us figure out that question." - pheltzer

(AL's curious dislike for that series of books negates this idea. But have a free +42/100 on me. -CV)

"I think we should be able to give our answers in the form of interpretive dance or sock puppets." - jrho

(-1, interpretive dance. +1, sock puppets. I guess you broke even this time. -CV)

"I demand more Bush-related subjects. Do you know how much Bush-related snark I have building up on my brain? It'll start coming out of my ears if I don't do something quick!" - popehippo

"I'm quite happy with the subjects you've done so far. I'm happier when I get quoted. I'm even happier when my mom gets quoted, too. I'm happiest when I get quoted more than mom does." - sskipstress



Despite intense desires to do so, I will not post three copies of this quiz. I'm thoughtful that way.

Thanks once again to all who played and enjoyed, and thanks also to everyone who offered up helpful (or questionable) ideas for quiz themes. Remember the motto of the Sirius Cybernetics Corporation's Nutri-Matic machine: "Share And Enjoy." Go forth and share the wonders of the quiz with everyone you know. Tell them to play. And if they refuse, give them the old baby harp seal treatment. Oh yeah.

Rock on!

AL&CV