LJ Daily Answers: 13 March 2006

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

"I just didn't smoke enough weed before answering this quiz." - kestrel127

"Ah, a tribute to the least popular vowel. I wonder if the U ever gets jealous of the Y. The Q only keeps the U around to make it look prettier by comparison, which makes it self-conscious, and the Y isn't even a real vowel but when it gets tired of being a consonant it drops in and everyone's all 'ooh, shiny adverbs!' And meanwhile the U's getting drunk in the corner, alone." - altoidsaddict

Yes indeed, this week's quiz is definitely "What U see is what U get". Let's see what we have in store for U awl...



1. Who was the third Secretary-General of the United Nations?

"Now United Nations, KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!" - richcsigs and 8 others

"I am the very model of the secretary-general
Of the United Nations, made up of decaying minerals
And broken treatises and those democracies, no, last they can't
Of course, it's in the job description when your weird name is U Thant." - deltashade, speaking for a great many others

"µ" - woap

"All memory of his name was lost in the ensuing confusion and argument about what title should be given to the secretary to the Secretary-General of the United Nations. Sec²(S-G_UN) was considered early on, but was dismissed because no-one likes trigonometry." - active_apathy

(For applying math to something completely non-mathematical, you get Geek^week=-1. -CV)

"Same thing we called every other SG of the UN: America's bitch." - buzz

"Desmond Tututu. It's the extra "Tu" that makes allll the difference." - zihuatanejo

(Thank you, Brak. -CV)

"Chancellor Palpatine" - mcrunner03

"I only know 3 secretary Generals, Willy Claes, Boutros Boutros Gali and Koffi Annan, neither of which was the third one I think." - b_hulsmans

(And Willy Claes was Secretary-General of NATO, not the UN. Better luck next time. -CV)

"I couldn't name a single member of the UN. I get my news from the Daily Show, and apparently those guys haven't acted stupidly enough in recent times." - portkey

(Can you say chaosvizier? I act stupidly all the time, but Jon Stewart never pays attention to me. -CV)

"Butros Butros Dali - Peacemaker, artist, Renaissance man" - marasca

"Butros Butros Gali. Who liked black Kofi. UN slash, everyone!" - nirejseki

(I would like to never think about this ever again, please. You get a -3. -CV)

(Also, a free -1 to everyone who misspelled his name "Butros" instead of "Boutros". Sure, the guy was an ass, but give him his name at least. -CV)

"Boutros-Boutros Ghali. It's wrong, but it's fun to say his name anyway. Boutros-Boutros Ghali! Boutros-Boutros Ghali! Boutros-Boutros Ghali!" - rikchik
"I think the only cooler name ever would something like Asskick-Asskick Awesome." - nakedblueninja

"You honestly expect all the Merkins playing this week to have any idea who the current Secretary General is, much less the third one?? I don't want to talk to you no more, you empty headed quiz maker. I snark in your general direction. Your mother was a New Jerseyan and your father smelt of pudding. Now go away or I shall Thant, U a second time!" - spatialrift47

(Nice buildup there. -CV)

Correct Answer: U Thant

"U Thant - actually his name was just Thant, and U simply means "Mr"." - lukeii

(That is correct. +1 for extra knowledge! -CV)



2. According to Zulu mythology, what is the name of the sky god who created humankind?

(And if any question merited 23 "There is no Dana, only Zuul!" comments, I suppose it was this one. -CV)

"Is this question going to bring out those dancing lions?" - akiyasan

(Well, now that you mentioned it, yes. -CV)

"Hey no fair! The Zulu mythos wasn't covered in Deities & Demigods." - richcsigs

"ShakaZuluKhan" - kittikattie

"I want Marduk in MY body!" - lyme

(Marduk craves not the barren wasteland of your dessicated viscera. -CV)

"Wasn't it that guy who dropped the Coke bottle from the airplane?" - spatialrift47, renee12321, zihuatanejo

(+1, The Gods Must Be Crazy. -CV)

"The sky god's connected to the/earth god/the earth god's connected to the/hell god/the hell god's connected to the/death god/dem gods gonna get us all" - skfromstamford

"My favorite mythological god is the one who created the stars by spooging all over the sky. That dude is COOL. And that, my friends, is about all I remember from my Ancient Religions elective in college." - wendynat

(I wonder what their explanations for "shooting stars" was... -CV)

"Zuzu sings 'I've got a loverly bunch of coconuts' in the Lion King, so... Dolly Parton!" - shannon_sue

"'Hey, Dad, I just got back from playing cards with the natives.'
'Zulus?'
'No, I won!'" - i_calql8

(Smells like hot cross puns in here... -CV)

"Um, I want to say Nkulunkulu, but that name's like banananananananananana so I'm not sure. nanananana." - the_wanlorn

"depending where you come from, it's pronounced in different ways. For instance, in the north he is seen as an orange dwarf with green hair, and they pronounce his name as Umpa-loompa-loo In the south, he is seen as a giant tentacled being called Unkulu-Cthulhu" - lukeii

"The Man from U.N.K.U.L.U.N.K.U.L.U." - vyseryn

Correct Answer: Unkulunkulu



3. Saruman The White's experiments in genetic engineering mixed goblin men with orcs to create which creatures?

"Saruman backwards spells NAMURAS!" - drbear

(Thank you for that somewhat useless bit of information. -CV)

"*is failing Biology*" - puredeadthingy

(I assure you, biology is not going to help you here. -CV)

"Republicans" - woap, richcsigs, marasca, bigredcandle, hthottie

"Teletubbies" - spatialrift47, robing, jonem

"Bjorks" - ladyiapetus

"Dottie - a blood sucking bitch from which there is no escape" - sestree

(+1, Armageddon. -CV)

"I was gonna write 'aurochs', but then realized that's completely different from Uruk-Hai." - nakedblueninja

"Dolly the Uruk-hai, of course. Despite the association with his name, however, Saruman soon regretfully had to weed out the 'fluffy white wool' genes. The warrior Sheep-Hais just weren't scaring anyone." - nirejseki

"Uruk-hai. They lust for manflesh. Which is why, when my friend's hamster bit her, we renamed it 'Uruk-hamster.'" - ANONYMOUS

"Does anyone else remember the in animated movie when the Urukhai did their musical number? I loved that part... It was like bad 80s music techno and... an offoffoffoff Broadway musical. Where there's a whip *crack!* There's a way! *bum bum bum bum* JAZZ HANDS!!!" - cortie

(I remember that. You may have +1 for citing the animated Return Of The King movie. -CV)

"Uruk High. We played them for homecoming one year." - zihuatanejo

"This 'ere is the Common Eastern White Handed Uru'Kai. Ain't this one a beauty? Look at'im standin' there in the wild, sword gleamin' an'all. The Uru'kai really hate it when ya shoot arrows at'em. You should neva do this, but I'm gonna do it anyway. Look'it the rage in'is eyes. When they get that look in'im, they are lookin' to do some killin'. Look'it, 'ere he comes!" - vyseryn

Correct Answer: Uruk-hai

"When Saruman says 'jump,' the Uruks ask, 'how hai?'" - barbarienne



4. In German, what is the common term for "underground rail", or subway?

"I don't know, but I would love to ride with Dieter and his monkey." - bloominglotus

"Those crazy Germans. A marriage proposal sounds like grinding a frog in a stone polisher." - lots42

(And how do you know.... wait, how do you know what either of those two things sounds like? -AL)

"I know two words in German. Haagan and Daaz. And that's all I need." - azure_dragon

"Schadenfreude." - jessicamariek

(Completely wrong, but +1 for mentioning my favorite German word. -AL)

"Don't know, I took French in school. German has some long-ass ambitious compound words that sound like someone choking for 2 minutes on dry toast and that scared me off." - ginalin

(They might have scare you off, both other Quizlings embraced them. See below. -AL)

"Thatformationofwagonsthatletsyoutravelundertheground." - alejandradd

(Deutsch, bitte. -AL)

"der Vichen Schmichen Schmacken Mach Dies" - marilyth

(Real Deutsch. -AL)

"Ich bin ein subway!" - nirejseki

(Thank you, President Kennedy. -CV)

"U-Bahn. Und warum weiß ich das? Weil ich aus Deutschland komme! Ha!" - varity
"Meine Schatzi fährt auf die Morgen U-Bahn! (oder Untergrundbahn...es ist großer als U-Bahn)" - cortie

(Well, I got what I asked for, but now I have no idea what it says. CV, a little help here? -AL)

(varity mentioned that they haven't been back to Germany since the heady days of East-West separation. cortie said that they love sausage in the subway hole, whatever that means. -CV)

"The only thing I remember about German transporation vocabulary is that the word for exit is ausfahrt. -1 for potty humor. I am so American sometimes, it's embarrassing." - __traicionera

"Haha. You thought you'd trick the American by asking an international question. Little did you know that I moved to Germany in August in anticipation of this very question. U-Bahn, bitches. Whew, now I can move back to the States." - jrho

"I-bahn, U-bahn, We all bahn for... bahn... bahn..." - buzz

(Way to fade out there.... -AL)

"Unless you are German, or can speak German fluently, do NOT try to say this five times fast; Unterirdische Eisenbahn" - cats_haven

(OK then, we'll go with the common abbreviation, which is....)

Correct Answer: U-Bahn

"But don't go to www.ubahn.com looking for time-tables. Quote: 'U-Bahn is a latex and leather clothing store for men lusting for that supple, second skin. We offer a full line of hard to find and custom tailored skins.'" - m31andy



5. Lyrics time! Name the song and artist!
"It's been seven hours and fifteen days
Since you took your love away"

"sounds like a country song. If I'm right, can I have half a point?" - kokopellinelli

(Sure you can. Let's see... nope, not country. NO POINT FOR YOU! TWO WEEKS! -CV)

"Why don't you ever have any Dwight Yoakam lyrics?" - hthottie

"Yanni! Not the answer, but Yanni just got arrested and I'd like to point that out." - altoidsaddict

"My love was heart shaped and chocolate, and I'm pretty sure my toilet took it away a little bit more than seven hours and fifteen days ago." - mistyraven

"'U Stink But I Luv U' by Billy and the Boingers" - robing

(+1, Bloom County, and sticking with the theme. -CV)

"Whatever it is, it must be by U2." - motown_deserter

(Also in the theme, true. But not this time. -CV)

"I have tried to get that bald Irishwoman out of my head since she faked cried through that music video. Now I'm going to have that Prince written (and spelled) song in my head all day long. Man she was an obsessed stalker!!" - marilyth

"That bald chick who is ANTI-GOD." - beckerbuns
"I don't recall Sting ever shaving his head and ripping up a photo of the Pope on Saturday Night Live." - pheltzer
"come on--who hasn't wanted to rip up the Pope on national television?" - __tracionera

"It has numbers in it and talks about love, therefore it's from Rent." - and 13 others

"Nothing Compares 2 Ur Bad Spelling" - noelleleithe

Correct Answer: Prince, "Nothing Compares 2 U"

(Note that, while Sinead O'Connor made the song famous, Prince is actually the original artist. -CV)



6. If you could do any one thing at all today, what would you do?

"Play the ljdq." - 13 of you. Full credit. +1's all around, even. And pudding.

"Sleep" - 18 of you. Lazy bums.

"I'd try to perfect lethargy." - whiski_sour

(Well, if you're gonna sleep, might as well do it right. -CV)

"Sit, Ubu, sit." - lusciousmango

(Good dog. -CV)

"Same thing we do every night, Pinky: Try to take over the world!" - 7 Brains

"I don't wanna work. I just want to bang on my drum all day." - renee12321

"Anything For Love (But I Won't Do That)" - jonem

"I got a hankerin' to hosswhip some Georgia politicians today." - fmh

"Get elected. I'm a candidate for the local council and today is election day." - gwenhyffar

(So... how'd you do? -CV)

"ATM, I would like 2 make it RLY illegal for PPL 2 use IM speak IRL BC OMGWTFBBQ??!!11" - robing

"move out of my stupid octagon shaped apartment. Why are there not any normal corners people?!?! My room is a WEDGE." - cortie

"I don't really think you're audience is old enough to read about my fantasies..." - b_hulsmans

(I think you underestimate the mental state of our audience. -CV)

"Angelina Jolie. In a French maid outfit. In the kitchen. With a can of whipped cream." - thepikey

(Chloe Sevigny, Orlando Bloom, Piper Perabo, and Virginie Ledoyen also received props here... -CV)

"I'd swim to the bottom of the ocean and play tag with Leviathan." - fizrep

"Hack into the CNN Senate feed and show that one 'Mars Attack' clip where the Senate got wiped out by lasers." - lots42

"I would buy you a monkey. I bet you've always wanted a monkey." - barbarienne

"I made a turkey pan full of pudding the other day, and it was yummy." - mercat

"Use genetic engineering to create my own set of creatures. Anyone have a sample of Jessica Alba's DNA?" - jacesan

"I think my one thing to do today is run naked round London, in the rain, waving a big salami and shouting 'come and get it, big boys' at the top of my voice." - m31andy



And in other news today: My hovercraft is full of eels.

Thanks again to everyone who played, a laurel and hearty handshake to everyone who's new here, and an open invitation to all to play more and spread the good news. The quiz is here; long live the quiz. Go forth all and pimp like you've never pimped before. Except for fizrep who has, in fact, pimped before.

See you all tomorrow, same bat-time, same bat-channel!

Rock On,

AL&CV

Comments

[deltashade.livejournal.com]

Okay, I think I have the formula for my answers from now on. Gilbert and Sullivan + America bashing = Profit Funny!

[thecolourclear.livejournal.com]

but why the letter U? I'd have picked ... um ... E. it's a good letter.

[pheltzer.livejournal.com]

That sounds painful

[rikchik.livejournal.com]

All that time working on the mythology of Papa Alpha Mike, and you pick the Boutros-Boutros Ghali answer. Oh well, can't complain. At least I'm one of the 13 to get +1 and pudding. (And I actually have 2 kinds of pudding for lunch today!)

[deza.livejournal.com]

Damn work, keeping me from playing the ljdq! AUGH!
*headdesk*

[sestree.livejournal.com]

I got quoted for the first time in weeks but I noticed that pyllgrum missed it this time. If you can only do one of us do him because he's funnier.

OK minds outta there you know what I meant *snerk*

[b-hulsmans.livejournal.com]

I should have know that about Willy Claes, the guy lives 30 miles from my place... I lower my head down in shame...

[sadasi.livejournal.com]

Your icon has just made me love you forever.
That is now my second-favourite linguistically pervy thing, next to "Linguistics majors do it with tongues".

I Want To Fondle Your Buttocks!

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Your comment is appropriate. However, it does not preclude your being a complete weirdo. ;-)

[david-deacon.livejournal.com]

No mentions for me this week, but scanning the ljdq has been the ONLY good thing about this morning.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

There's plenty of letters left in the alphabet. I'm sure we'll get to E sooner or later.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Well, at least it doesn't keep you from reading the LJDQ. But playing is much better. Come on, girl! Be a player, not a hater!

[babybokal.livejournal.com]

In Soviet Russia, LJDQ forgets you!

Not that it would have mattered. I'm feeling distinctly unfunneh this month.

[ishtar79.livejournal.com]

"My favorite mythological god is the one who created the stars by spooging all over the sky. That dude is COOL. And that, my friends, is about all I remember from my Ancient Religions elective in college." - [info]wendynat


Hey, and the Greek name of that God (well, higher being. Technically the Gods were his grandkids) was actually Uranus. Which is in keeping with theme!

And makes English-speaking people around the world giggle non-stop.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Funny is always relative. Sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you gotta do pyllgrum. Seize the nut! Carpe pyllgrum! YOU CAN DO IT!

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

I was too lazy to include your image of Chloe. But rest assured, it was good.

Also, props for Al Swearengin. Greatest character in the history of HBO series.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

I don't remember the myth of Uranus using the heavens as a wank-rag. And here I thought I was pretty down with the whole Greek Mythology thing...

"They finally changed its name to put an end to that silly joke once and for all."
"Oh really? What's it called now?"
"Urrectum. Want to smell it?"
"No I... think I'll sniff around over here instead."

[deza.livejournal.com]

Bitch, please. I was playa back when you were still in short school.

[ishtar79.livejournal.com]

It's been a while since I read it, but it wasn't even the main part of his creation sex with Gaia, just a little...spillover.

The Sniff-o-scope!

[deza.livejournal.com]

Not only did he decorate the ceilings with his nocturnal emissions, but when he got castrated his testes became rocky islands and his sperm became the sea froth that later gave birth to Aphrodite. Talk about awkward family reunions...

[kestrel127.livejournal.com]

Wow. I really didn't smoke enough weed for this one.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Oh oceanic sea foam, I'll never look at you the same way again...

The LJDQ does not condone drug use. You should drink instead.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

That's ok. Buy some more and try again tomorrow!

[raspberryfixx.livejournal.com]

That man can pass a stone like no one's business.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

"Master Yoda, why you bein' a playa hata?
You know I gotta go confront Lord Vada!" (http://humor.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?site=http://atomfilms.shockwave.com/af/content/atom%5F1403)