LJ Daily Answers: 9 January 2006

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

"This quiz theme couldn't come at a better time. It's January in Maine, which means that whenever someone says 'It's freezing out there!' you hope they're right, because that means the temperature is up to 32!" - peaseblossom03

That's right. We're starting the New Year on a warm happy note. Imagine the warmth of the summer sun. Unless you're somewhere where it is summer, in which case... ahh, fuck it, just read the answers already.



1. Shaquille O'Neal led what team to the NBA Eastern Conference finals in 2005?

"I'm willing to bet that he was the worst rapper on the team." - altoidsaddict

"Sorry, I don't listen to hip-hop." - fizrep

(+1, South Park: Bigger, Longer, Uncut. -CV)

"The Orlando Blooms.... I know its a team in Florida, but thats all i know about basketball." - jenny_1981

"Miami Vice" - sasscat

"Who cares about basketball now that he's a cop?!?!" - notevenu

(Oh, you and your men in uniform fetish... -CV)

"The only team that I associate Shaq with would be... the Magics? Maybe? I think the Bulls had Michael Johnson. Who I always mix up names with Michael Jackson for a split second. It's so wrong." - darksky23

(There are many things that are so wrong with your answer. -CV)

"The Swedish Bikini Team. They got lost on the way, and like a proper gentleman, he led them there.
" - feste

(You think you can distract our attention with pictures of hot scantily clad women? -CV)

(...........yes. -AL&C)

(...........yeah. He can. -CV)

"Shaquille O'Neal makes me think of 'Coquille St.Jacques', which is a delicious dish made with scallops. Damn. I'm hungry. I really shouldn't LJDQ on an empty stomach." - sweetpea86

"I don't really think its fair to let Shaq play, what with his Kazaam magic and his Shaq Fu ninja skills
" - mcrunner03

"My husband is still weeping because Shaq left the Lakers. I told him to buck up and stop being a wussy boy, but he won't stop whining. Should I smite him?" - wendynat

(Yes. -CV)

"Holy Crap... are the players on the Heat that strung out on cocaine that they can't find the Finals on their own... they need to be led there... and by Shaq no less?" - pheltzer

"The Miami Heat. An odd name for a team in a relatively cool part of the country." - photosinensis

(I'm not sure about you, but I know at least thirty states that could claim to be cooler than Miami by a long shot... -CV)

"The Heat? How the heck do you make a mascot for that?" - samuraimeg

(Here's a starter idea... -CV)

"Miami Heat. And Heat, for the record, is a stupid, stupid name. What is it with Basketball teams having names that AREN'T PLURAL THINGS? Jazz, Heat, Magic -- we don't see that sort of crap in the OTHER sports! Steelers! Yankees! Rangers!" - cpip

(I present the Red Sox and White Sox as counterarguments. At least basketball can spell properly. -CV)

Correct Answer: The Miami Heat

"naturally the Florida residents demanded a recount after they lost." - buzz



2. What rock band hit it big with the albums "Mother's Milk" and "Blood Sugar Sex Magik"?

"Limozeen" - emerlee

(+1, Strongbad. -CV)

"Ok, I've heard of blood magic, and sex magic, but sugar magik? Is that like in Ghost Busters where they accidentally invoke the giant marshmallow man? That was damn scary. If I'd seen that when I was six, I'd have been put off marshmallows forever." - sadasi

"Blood Sugar makes me think of diabetes...then Sex Magik (OH THE SPELLING) makes me think of, like...David Bowie in Labyrinth even though he's saying 'Dance Magic.' And then thinking of David Bowie in that movie naturally makes me think of his ah...package, which had a starring role all by itself. 'Diabetic Crotch' would have saved them two words." - kokopellinelli

"The Brightly Coloured Food Stuffs of a Spicy Persuasion. At least, that's how they're known in the Somerset Underground, fo' sho'!" - kantiandream

"Y'know, 'Californication' was the first music video I ever saw. One of my friends told me once her mother sang it as 'colonic irrigation'." - puredeadthingy

"Red Hot Chili Peppers. I like them. I like how they all look like drug addicts whether they're on drugs or not. Kinda like Benecio Del Toro. No matter what, he always looks like he should be slurring his words." - whiski_sour

(Oddly enough, Benicio looks a lot better when he's not acting. He just gets all the sleazy roles that make him look strung out. -CV)

"That would be these guys:
" - peaseblossom03
"They saved on their clothing back then. Only one sock a piece." - akiyasan
"Too bad no other sexy rock band men copied the trend of performing naked except for a strategically placed sock." - dracothelizard

Correct Answer: Red Hot Chili Peppers

"I wonder if they have a fancy acronym. Maybe their fans refer to them as RHCP but get confused with Remote Host Configuration Protocol, which would probably also be a good band name. They could do instrumental machine music." - fiftyeighthours

(You may have the acronym GOTW. Geek Of The Week comes with a free -1. Share and enjoy! -CV)



3. What 1967 Sidney Poitier film about a black cop investigating a small-town murder eventually sparked a television series starring Carroll O'Connor?

"They call me Mister _____" - 14 of you
"After watching In The Heat of the Night, I finally get that joke in The Lion King where Pumbaa is all, 'They call me MR. PIG!' and then kicks some hyena ass." - soimpossible414

"May I answer a question with a question? Wow. I just did. I'm so deep. I'm like Socrates, only less hairy." - szellem

(And this week's ljdq Non Sequitur Award goes to... szellem! -CV)

"The guy sitting next to me in the sandwich shop has an extra finger. It's really freaking me out." - wendynat

(Ok, you can have the award too. -CV)

"The night before Carroll O'Connor died, I was watching an episode of 'All in the Family' when I thought to myself Geez... Carroll O'Connor is still alive... and BAM! the next morning he was dead. This is a totally true story." - notevenu

(Dear notevenu: Please don't wish us dead. We'll be good. Promise. -CV)

"I always forget that Sidney Poitier is a man, because, well, Sidney is a girly name. Don't tell him I said that though, I still wouldn't want to get into a fight with the guy. And Sidney, if you're reading this: My computer was hacked. This isn't me." - mirrorslie

"Shaft is Coming to Dinner." - caffeineod

"Murder, S/he Wrote: Special Carroll's Unit." - weill

"Heat Me Baby One More Time?" - fiftyeighthours

"I don't know but I get a feeling there's lynching going on at the end." - caseypuffy

"Oh there goes my nipples again, Edith!!" - fizrep

(+1, Sealab 2021. -CV)

"I always feel like a failure because I've tried to read To Kill A Mockingbird dozens of times and I always give up from sheer boredom." - liseuse

(Allow me to assist you. This will take a mere ten minutes. It'll be worth it. -CV)

"I'm guessing 'In the Heat of the Night' and the only reason I know this is that him and my father are the only two people apparently in this world with the name of Carroll. And when I say, 'No, two Rs, two Ls, like Carroll O'Connor,' people my age look at me blankly. Young whipper-snappers." - jazzminarino

"The TV series also had Carroll O'Connor's son, Hugh O'Connor, just in case you were wondering. It has absolutely nothing to do with the theme." - etumukutenyak

Correct Answer: In The Heat Of The Night



4. What name did Dutch settlers give to members of the Khoikhoi Tribe of southern Africa?

"Bob. Or given that they were Dutch, possibly 'Hans.' Or is Hans German? Anyway, I'm sure there were enough names for everybody." - 3jane

(German, Dutch- it's a name for all lands. But, alas, no. -CV)

"Oompa-Loompas." - elaran

"Zulus? My Dad told me once Zulus used to run everywhere. Not walk but jog/run everywhere. I wish I could run like that but my breasts are against it." - caseypuffy

"I'm gonna say the Bushmen. Not because I think its right, but mostly because I just loved the little guys in the Gods Must Be Crazy I & II. They're just so gosh-darned cute!" - djs_specs

"The Hot Carls. No, no, don't quote that. My mother reads LJDQ. And then she'll look it up on Wikipedia. And then she'll find out what a Donkey Punch is." - altoidsaddict

"I am guessing the answer is 'hotentots' which always sounded like it should be the brand name of tater tots, which then leads to the adjacent thought of 'NAPOLEON, GIVE ME SOME OF YOUR TOTS'. Free assocation is fun." - lyme

"I'm pretty sure it's Hottentots, which I remember primarily as being a rejected opponent for Opus, Portney, and the rest of the crew of 'Wheel Trek.'" - tiercel

(I do believe your Bloom County knowledge has served you well. -CV)

"How many tots could a Hottentot tote if a Hottentot could tote tots?" - captainsblog

(He would tote what tots a Hottentot could tote if a Hottentot could tote tots. -CV)

"The Hottentots, as in the Hottentot Venus. I still find it odd that it was deemed socially acceptable in the early 1800's for someone to say, 'What ho, this native woman has massive genitalia! I think I shall take her to England and charge people to have a look at it!'" - soimpossible414

(See also, The Elephant Man. Ah, the good old days... -CV)

"Hottentot, how did the Dutch ever come up with that mangled name from Khoikhoi? I mean, first it was Manhattan and the beads, and now this." - pyllgrum

"The Hottennots, a word which describes their practice of lining up the natives and rating them on their attractiveness." - buzz

Correct Answer: Hottentots



5. Name the phenomenon in which a liquid is artificially brought to a temperature higher than its natural boiling point without actually boiling.

"Boiling without boiling? MAGICK, I say! Witchcraft!" - deltashade

"Is this even possible? How can something be hotter than boiling but not boil? And why doesn't this quiz have a reference to Paris Hilton calling something Hot?" - drbear

(Because we, like all good and civilized people, hate Paris Hilton with the fiery passion of a thousand HOT suns. -AL&CV&C)

"Watching. It is commonly known that a watched pot never boils." - dhud98

"Faking it." - shannon_sue
"Sounds like ejaculation to me." - phoenixxxdown

"HIBS or Honey, I've Been Shopping. You should see the steam come out of my husband's ears during HIBS experiments." - mercurykiss

(That's just cruel. -CV)

"The only thing that I learned in Chemistry class was that you can light steel wool on fire by touching a battery to it. Or at least I think it was steel wool. And.. well, I'm pretty sure it was a battery." - weill

(I lack confidence in what you call "learning". -CV)

"That's like when I'm too lazy to heat up soup on the stove and the microwave turns it into some sort of superheated plasma which then mysteriously jumps back right over an acceptable temperature to disappointingly cold. Thermodynamics can bite me." - rose727

"Superheating - you can do this in your microwave if you have a perfectly smooth bowl/dish/cup. It's very dangerous because once it is disturbed, the water will immediately evaporate at that extremely high temperature." - droptheleash622

"Cheating physics. 'Hey, physics, look over there while I heat this water!'" - rikchik

"Hotter than a steaming boiler, more pressurized than the surface of Titan, able to create explosive bubbles with a single granule, it's superheating!" - ntlespino

Correct Answer: Superheating



6. What gets you hot?

"Getting an answer up on LJDQ, of course. *strips naked at the thought*" - beccak1961

(Here's your answer. We await photographic evidence. -CV)

"What *doesn't*? I'm so horny the crack of dawn better be careful around me." - thepikey

"How about breastesses, because we like that word." - bizzatch

"I like explosions and swords. But not exploding swords." - sasscat

"Kevin Sorbo and Orlando Bloom in his Legolas costume." - cats_haven

"I still think David Duchovny is a fine specimen of homo sapiens manbiscuitus. ...sh'up." - chaobell

"If we're talking about hot and bothered...Rebecca Romijn as Mystique." - fiftyeighthours

(Word up. Blue chicks are sexy. -CV)

"General Zod. I just can't explain it." - wendynat

(SQUEAL BEFORE ZOD! -GZ)

"Blind strippers using braille to read audience response." - pyllgrum

"Victoria's Secret SemiAnnual Sale. I wanted to put on everything I bought, then take it off right away. Rawr." - colelynne

"Why, THIS!
" - altoidsaddict

"" - kestrel127

"" - david_deacon

"angledge and a bottle of Bailey's." - fizrep
"chaosvizier. And pudding. And chaosvizier *and* pudding." - jonem
"angledge, chaosvizier, chlaal, and Johnny Depp. They're all in about the same league." - the_zaniak

(Sucking up to the mods is ok in our book. Carry on. -AL&CV&C)

"Pictures of angledge dressed as a blue roof!
" - captainsblog

Correct Answer: "Give a man a fire, and he will be hot for a night. Set a man on fire, he will be hot for the rest of his life." - feste



Hopefully this week's quiz has warmed the cockles of your heart if you are enjoying the cold spoils of January's wintery bliss. Of course, if you're all Southern Hemisphere (ooh, I could use that new word I learned, "antipodean"), you're in the middle of summer, so what the hell, it's already hot. Enjoy!

And, of course, tune in next week (specifically, tomorrow) for more exciting adventures with ljdq. Tell your friends to come and play! They'll love it! We will too!

Rock On,

AL&CV&C