LJ Daily Answers: 5 September 2005

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

"Hey barkeep, Jobu needs a refill!" - hemloche

+1, Major League.

"gasp! we've got a theme of booze??? who'd've thunk it from our mods?????" - songquake

Yes, indeed, your mods offered you an alcoholic theme this week. We've already extolled the virtues of gin in a past quiz, and this time we focused on the "water of life" that helps Ang get through all her days: whisky and its many variations. To handle this theme properly, chaosvizier got good and loaded Saturday night. On gin, of course, not whisky, because blech, scotch is nasty. marasca reports from Japan that brandy is also nasty. And as for Ouzo, Sambuca, and all their licorice-flavored brethren, they are truly of the devil.

And with that said, let's see what happened last week!



1. What is the name of the 2005 Major League Soccer expansion team in Southern California?

"This has something to do with Wisconsin, doesn't it?" - reenjalas

(Nope, still California. -CV)

"It's probably hyphenated, politically correct, and not allowed to smoke in bars." - whiski_sour

(Surprisingly, none of the above. -CV)

"American soccer? Who cares? I made some of the most decadent chocolate pudding tonight and that is consuming me while I consume it. Okay, that just sounds like a pudding 69. Tasty, but, 0h, so wrong." - erisian_fields

"The California Raisins. Come on! You know it's time for a come-back!" - raspberryfixx

"Team Terminator" - shippygrl
"The Venice Beach Exspandex" - germankitty
"the Baja Bastards" - setting_sun
"San Andreas Faultlines" - ntlespino
"the Tequila Mockingbirds." - deltashade

"The San Andreas Grand Theft Autos?" - nakedblueninja

(They do serve free hot coffee at all their games, I hear. -CV)

"Actually, "chivas" means "kids," although I've also heard it means "goats." Either goats or kids will kick, making the name appropriate for a soccer team." - drbear

Correct Answer: Chivas USA



2. Jan Leiser and Annina Luck of Switzerland painted these two sculptures.

On the left is the Rescuephant. What is the name of the creature on the right?

"Holy Shit, The Drugs Are Kicking In" - lots42

"*mumbles* Modern art, in my day we had nay but coloured chalk and paving slabs." - tormentpid

"OH! That's the new symbol for the Democrat Party. I just saw it on Fox News!" - raspberryfixx

"Most commonly seen on pins and bumper stickers, the Democratic Donkey set out into the wild world to prove that it actually can stand up for itself." - rivetkitten

"Americass! Unless they happened to've been visiting my darling state at the time. In that case, it would be the Masshole." - the_wanlorn

"he's on Queer-ohney for the Straight Pony." - puredeadthingy

"The Ricolass." - lusciousmango
"The Yankidonki" - grapefruitzzz
"The Union-Jackass?" - droptheleash622

"Eeyore. This is a snap from his rebellious teenage years, soon after he'd discovered tattoos." - smittenrosebud

"something else for the hoodlums in DC to destroy/steal." - hthottie

(Ah, you've seen them then? -CV)

"I looked at the picture before reading the question and spent a long time trying to figure out why anyone would make life-size sculpture of an ostrich with too many legs and a fallopian tube for a head. Knowing that it's based on an elephant doesn't make things a lot clearer. Also, that donkey appears to be presaging some horrific return to the time of leg-warmers. I wonder if I can dig my purple Get In Shape Girl ones out of the attic?" - fyreflyblue

"The Swiss-Dong, or something like that. I know it's short." - dhud98

(So close... -CV)

"Okay, if my guess is right, then the theme is booze. And that's a donkey that was made in Switzerland. So I think it must be a booze that ends in '-key', and the only one I know is 'whiskey'. ...Oh, no. No, it can't be! No, that's just too god-damned horrible even for me! I mean, I appreciate a good pun, but that's just AWFUL, and I somehow think this is angledge's revenge. Please, for the love of my sanity, tell me it's not 'Swisskey'." - deltashade

(For your incredible use of logic and deduction that successfully led to the answer, you are hereby awarded the first-ever ljdq Vulcan Science Academy Award For Logic. Good show, old chap! -CV)

Correct Answer: The Swiss-key

"I can't stop staring at the somewhat-phallic looking trunk of the elephant." - lyme
"Rescuephant sure takes penis envy to a whole new level." - therhythmthief



3. What is the name of the American who was captured while fighting US forces in northern Afghanistan in 2001?

"A weird bug just flew into my Diet Coke can. It probably thought there was rum in there." - wendynat

(Apropos of... absolutely nothing. -CV)

"Benedict Arnold IV" - arib

"Cat Stevens." - adderyn

"Captain Morgan!" - richcsigs

(He was just a pirate, not a traitor. There's a difference. Sort of. -CV)

"Mr. T. Thats why we are having such a bad time in Iraq. All the troops are demoralized knowing there is no possible way they could ever truly defeat even one member of the A-Team." - tarpo

"Too bad Optimus Prime couldn't be the one to capture him." - merrick42

"His wife maintains that it was his fault for refusing to ask for directions." - maggiebloome

"I know they called him 'The American Taliban.' He wanted 'Taliban Man,' since it sounds cooler and he could write a theme song for himself to the tune of 'The Candyman' from Willy Wonka, but alas! his wishes were denied." - drachechan

(It's very difficult to suppress my natural urge to insert "Taliban Man" into TMBG's "Particle Man"... -CV)

"Formerly a noted Communist known as Johnny Walker Red, he changed his last name at the end of the Cold War to Lindh and starred in several rather dull spy novels by Tom Clancy under the series title 'Lindh Ops.'" = captainsblog

"It was that guy that makes Lindt Chocolates. They caught him with a bottle of Johnny Walker Blue singing Country Music. Country Music... The Music of Pain. He lost his job, his mullah left him, his pick up truck got bombed, and his dog got caught in the cross fire." - vyseryn

(The only thing you got right in this was equating Country Music to Pain. -CV)

Correct Answer: John Walker Lindh

"His brothers, Jack Daniel and Jim Beam, were so ashamed of him." - slickrickt



4. What classic clipper ship, preserved as a museum in Greenwich, England, was named after a witch in a Robert Burns poem?

"Sorry, I'm an American male. We don't read poetry unless we're trying to score." - richcsigs

"There is a Greenwich in England too? God, those English people Copy us ALL THE TIME. Next thing you know, they will take credit for placed like New York, New England, and Cambridge." - vyseryn
"*sneers* As if the Greenwich in America would have anything so cultured." - puredeadthingy

"A ship..preserved as a museum. That's bloody clever, is that. Why not just preserve it as a ship? Maybe they could pickle it." - eviltwin737
"is the witch also preserved?" - songquake

"Named after a witch.... preserved in Greenwich... Is it The Green Witch?" - fyreflyblue

(Because AL isn't around, I'm giving you +1. -CV)

"S. S. Weighs The Same As A Duck" - altoidsaddict

"Cutty Sark was probably named for a witch because it puts a hex on you. It thickens your tongue and wobbles your walk. Wee sproggin will dance in your sporran, 'til ye be spewin'" - feste

"Found a scotch at a bar that is called (I swear I am not making this up) 'Master of his Domain.' Cannot stop thinking about Seinfeld whenever I see this never used bottle sitting on the bottom shelf of the bar." - southbucki

"The only clipper ship I can think of in London is the Cutty Sark. Is that named after a witch? That's be pretty cool, if it was; I might be getting married on it." - flickgc

Correct Answer: Cutty Sark



5. James McFarlane and, later, David Bradford led an uprising against the United States government to protest, among other things, the collection of excise tax on certain liquors. What was this uprising called?

"My knowledge of American-ness is limited, but I am guessing the Boston Tea Party." - tormentpid

(Your knowledge of American-ness is more limited than you think. -CV)

"Saint Patricks Day!" - vyseryn

"I'd revolt if I couldn't get my drink on, too." - deza

"I'll take 'Wars Actually Worth Fighting" for $800, Alex.'" - southbucki

"You gotta fight! (BUM BUM) For your right! (BUM BUM) To paaaaartaaay!! And you can't party if the booze is too expensive!" - vanbrosia

(Ah, Beastie Boys, is there nothing you cannot teach us? -CV)

"when they united with the pro-Marijuana group, I think they used the slogan, "If you can't liquor 'em, joint 'em"." - sweetpea86

"The Whiskey Rebellion, which thankfully doesn't happen to me often. Unlike, say, the Red Wine rebellion, which usually happens the morning after, and the Tequila Rebellion, which happens about five minutes after the shot goes down." - fyreflyblue

"Normally a Whiskey Rebellion is when too much of the stuff is invited to live in your belly, and it all tries to vacate at once..." - feste

"Bob, they're putting an excise tax on our whiskey."
"Yeah, Bill, I know."
"What do you think we should do about it?
"Drink all of the whiskey, get a few shotguns together, and kill the tax collectors!"
"But what should we call it? Y'know, so our pointles little revolt doesn't get forgotten and whatnot."
"I know! The Moonshine Rebellion!"
"I was thinking more along the lines of the Boston Whiskey party."
"Let's compromise and call it the Whiskey Rebellion."
"Sure, sounds good to me. Let me get my rifle." - photosinensis

Correct Answer: The Whiskey Rebellion

"I once led an uprising in my pants.. Best 5 minutes EVER" - tarpo

(Yeah, didn't see that one coming. -CV)



6. Complete the following sentence: “Setting down his eighth whisky dram of the evening, Iain wiped his mouth, adjusted his kilt, and...”

(Number of people who offered lyrics to "The Scotsman" song: 14. -CV)

"I believe any time whisky and kilt are used in a sentence there needs to be, within 2 lines, the word wanker, or bugger.. Hopefully we can avoid the whole sheep mess though." - tarpo

(No such luck. -CV)

"I don't know where this is going, but I like it. Perhaps we could have a competition where each quizling contributes a sentence to the story? Except it would then include Gin, Yoda, Sting and Zombies all within the first paragraph. Scratch that. Lets just imagine the hot hot Scottish porn." - jonem

"....decided to have a look up his own kilt to see if he really is wearing anything under it." - [Bad username or site: setting sun @ livejournal.com]

"... and died as the Martian shot him in the back, as Martians are want to do." - wiredwizard

"Gave the spare 'i' in his oddly spelt name to a passing cyclops, who was extremely grateful." - eviltwin737

("Polyphemos to the bridge." - "Aye, Captain." -CV)

"...embraced the porcelain Loch Ness." - captainsblog

"...picked up his broadsword. 'Tonight, Duncan McLeod of the Clan McLeod's head shall be mine! There can be only one!'" - ginalin

"...passed out, thus allowing Marion to win the drinking contest and collect the money that got her closer to home, until those damn Nazi's came along." - richcsigs

(+1, Raiders of the Lost Ark. -CV)

"...wrote his name in the snow." - fmh

"... put a sporran on his sgian dubh." - germankitty

"asked his mate what they were going to do after these starters" - enlight_bystand



Yes, it was a shorter quiz this week- not as many responses this time around, owing, we suspect, to the onset of the fall semester. Study hard, quizlings, that you might gain knowledge needed to face the weekly challenges the quiz poses! Or don't, and just have a good time, because that's what college is about. Also, tell your friends. And think happy thoughts for folks in the Gulf area, including hellpaladin2183, who was in the area at the time. And wish angledge luck, as she may shortly be headed out to the area to provide some environmental cleanup and such. And wish chaosvizier luck, because he's ridiculously good-looking.

Rock on,

AL&CV

Comments

[setting-sun.livejournal.com]

"....decided to have a look up his own kilt to see if he really is wearing anything under it."

Apparently I've had an eclipse because my 'sun' is missing. Oi, oi!

Chivas USA is an absolutely shit name for a sports franchise.

[deltashade.livejournal.com]

Aw, AL wasn't around? Had I known that, I totally would have punned everywhere I could.

But quoted twice, and also I'm the winner of a new LJDQ award! So...*mixes up a Zombie* Who wants drinks?

[jonem.livejournal.com]

One G&T, please. Easy on the T!

[prettypinkkitty.livejournal.com]

Better than Real Salt Lake, named after Real Madrid so the way they indicate that it's not pronounced "real (sounds like reel)" is to make it ReAl. That always cracks me up.

At least Chivas USA makes me think of booze!

[jmspencer.livejournal.com]

But not as bad as Real Salt Lake

[feste.livejournal.com]

"Gave the spare 'i' in his oddly spelt name to a passing cyclops, who was extremely grateful." - eviltwin737

Ian. Short for "Cyclopian" meaning "Having only one I"

[lotusbiosm.livejournal.com]

What was the theme? Was there a theme? I count on the theme to help me figure out answers, it's part of my quiz-taking strategy.

[ntlespino.livejournal.com]

Why the bloody heck would they want it to be "Royal Salt Lake"? Are they setting up a Kingdom of some sort there?

[ntlespino.livejournal.com]

Rhum and Coke. 4 parts Rhum please.

[ntlespino.livejournal.com]

*cough* booze? (points to top top top of post)

[dv8dragonfly.livejournal.com]

Damn Renn Faire! It made me miss the ljdq. Guess I will have to go drown my sorrows in someone's kilt. That's right, I said kilt.

I love the Maryland Renaissance Festival.

[jmspencer.livejournal.com]

They were taking the name from Real Madrid, the Royal Spanish Football Team. And pissing off a lot of people in the process

[scifantasy.livejournal.com]

And you're in direct contrast to gruyere.

[fyreflyblue.livejournal.com]

Ian. Short for "Cyclopian" meaning "Having only one I"

*groan* Oh, that's awful!

[lotusbiosm.livejournal.com]

*blushes* See, I skimmed that part looking at the answers. I still don't get it, as there are a number of those I've never heard of. I mean, the Whiskey Rebellion part should have made it jump out at me (because I knew that off hand), but I didn't get how the Cutty Sark was a liquor reference, and that was the only other one I knew. I was thinking that with Whiskey and kilts, maybe it was some sort of Scottish theme, but that didn't make sense either. I still don't really get them all.

[enlight-bystand.livejournal.com]

It's not actually from royal...

There are several of them in Spain, left over from the end of the evil plot to take over La Liga with clones!

[n5iln.livejournal.com]

(It's very difficult to suppress my natural urge to insert "Taliban Man" into TMBG's "Particle Man"... -CV)

So that means all we have to do to take care of that guy once and for all is to call in Triangle Man? Geez, how come nobody thought of that before?

[jmspencer.livejournal.com]

Well, either way, I maintain that having one in Salt Lake is asinine

[n5iln.livejournal.com]

Is that anything like admitting "I love 'quick-time, HARCH!'"?

[germankitty]

Me, for being quoted twice, too (and me a newbie! Ooh ..) No award though. *sniff*

I'll join ionem in the G&T, please.

[germankitty]

Cutty Sark is a brand name for Scotch whisky. :)

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Everything's better with G&T.

[germankitty]

Isn't it just. :) *hic*

[iankeith.livejournal.com]

Man, zero quotes, I must have really sucked.

[ginalin.livejournal.com]

I've learned so much from this week's quiz.

I rarely drink alcohol, which explains why I knew zippo about this weeks answers.

It's not because of any convictions, I'm simply alcohol intolerant. Stuff makes me sicker than a dog. I can't even finish a can of beer without flushing bright red and getting nauseous. More for the rest of you.