LJ Daily Answers, 22 August 2005
Aug. 22nd, 2005 08:27 amGood morning, Quizland! This week's Answers are arrayed before you like a bouquet arranged by
"Flowers. Fucking flowers. You had to make an LJDQ about fucking FLOWERS. The sudden spinning of my head is making me come out of lurking. I don't have anything truly witty to say, but you see, I work with flowers. I buy them wholesale and manage store orders for four large supermarket chains. I used to love flowers. Now I hate them with a passion that borders on madness." -
"Zombies => Flowers. DOES NOT COMPUTE." -
You see, the zombies were finally laid down into their graves, where they immediately pushed up some daisies. Thus, flowers.
1. What is the name of the English civil war that erupted in 1455 between the Houses of York and Lancaster?
"When chivalry was in bloom, and the Renassaince was in flower...." -
(I am changing your LJ name to
"If there is one nation who can have a 'civil' war, it's England. 'Scuse me, old man, may we attack 'morrow next?' 'Pip pip, old chap! Quite alright with us!' 'Splendid! Ta!'" -
"The only English history date I really remember is 1066. Whenever I ring people up at work at it comes to 1066 I immediately think 'Battle of Hastings!' If anyone else should ever say this, ever, I will probably marry him or her on the stop, whether he or she wants to or not." -
(Fair enough. We've been warned. -AL)
"I drive through York and Lancaster every time I visit
"Another 'where was my brain during History class' question. Why?" -
(Because Quizlings complain too much when we do math questions! We've gotta ask you something, you know. -AL)
"Peppermint Patties sound hella good right now. Thanks a lot." -
"Obviously York won because you've never heard of a Lancaster Peppermint patty have you?" -
"That would be celebrity deathmatch where Bette Middler took on Axl Rose in the War of the Roses and kicked his ass by teaching him how to speak in a normal voice." -
"It's worth noting that although Lancaster won the original war, York Uni's won the War of the Roses more times than the Uni of Lancaster in the yearly university sports battle. Although, we do have enough space to have a mock battle. Fake blood, horses, and people dressed up as walking tin cans are much better than the usual footie and cricket matches." -
(You should start a campaign to have them switch over to a mock battle, then. Surely some of your fellow students - such as
"I can just imagine soldier going out, fear in their eyes when they hear the enemy: RELEASE THE TULIPS!" -
"The Sissy Slapfight Of Lancaster. 'You...you...monster! I do not look fat in this wig!' Slap, slap, slap." -
"War of the Roses, which was also a movie involving Michael Douglas and Kathleen Turner when they each refused to be the one to leave the house during a bitter divorce battle. I find it sad I know that synopsis better than the true events of renaissance/medieval England." -
"Announcer: The crown is in the air, and Hen3ry The Sixth comes up with it!
Hen3ry VI: Victory is mine!
Announcer: But he's hit immediately by King John, that rarely performed player from the twelfth century, and he's down. Oh, he's killin' him out there! This could be the end of the War of the Roses cycle! King John is in the clear...
John: My soul hath elbow room!
Announcer: He's at the forty, the thirty, the twenty--he's poisoned on the ten yard line! Looks like he's out for the game. Replacing him now is number seventy-two, King Lear.
Lear: Divide we our kingdom in three. Cordelia, you go long...
Announcer: A penalty marker is down. Fictional character on the field. Lear is disqualified and he's not happy about it.
Lear: Puckey!" -
"Well, I see were this is going. It's another flower theme, isn't it?" -
(... another? When did we do flowers? -AL)
Correct Answer: "War of the
Roses" - "It woulda been much more entertaining if it had been the War of the Hoses, where each faction tried to kill the other with the power and size of their MIGHTY CODPIECE." -
2. What is the common name given to the Imperial throne of Japan?
"Japaneese stuff is always long and descriptive so it's probably something like 'The seat of he who is the sun and leads all his people against the foreign devils, plus is made of jade and is quite shiny.'" -
"The 'Yeah, We never really held much power, not with those Shoguns, and especially after WWII, but dammit, at least my people still adore Us, not like that Elizabeth and her morally questionable brood' Throne." -
"With his new Charmin
Emperor must go and sit
At the Haiku Loo." -
"right below it is the plaque emblazoned 'Hirohito Shat Here'" -
"Probably something involving flowers, but spelled badly, and it turns into a giant robot. With lasers." -
"I'm going to randomly guess that it has something to do with a lotus, because that's related to Japan. Or maybe China. Same thing, right?" -
(When China and Japan have their next bout of open hostilities, I'm blaming you. -CV)
"The
"I accuse anyone that spells this correctly of webcheating (or at the very least Websterscheating)." -
(I double-checked the spelling on dictionary.com before posting the Answers. -AL)
"If it's someone who's rather close to the throne, they might be permitted to address her as "Chrissie". People who can't spell very well are also allowed that privelege, because, let's face it- Chrysanthemum wasn't on our word lists in grade one for a reason." -
"The Chrysanthemum Throne. When I first heard about it, I pictured a giant gold chrysanthemum tuffet that the Emperor had to sit on. And those petals are SPIKY. It would have been a literal pain in the ass." -
"Chrysanthemum throne, isn't it? And tell me, ljdq, why I suddenly remember I have overdue library books when I think of this answer? Ain't a one of them have anything to do with Japan...." -
"The Chrysanthemum Throne: I have no idea why I answered that. It just popped into my head. *wonders where that came from*" -
(Sorry, no idea. Your mental processes are a mystery to us too. -AL&CV)
"I'm going to go out on a limb here and say it has something to do with a flower. Did you know that there's a flower called 'broom-rape'? I find that quite disturbing. Of course, it'd be more disturbing if that was the common name of the throne... aaaaaand, great, those were images I never needed to see." -
Correct Answer: The Chrysanthemum Throne.
3. What is the name of the Van Gogh painting that was auctioned by Sotheby’s on March 30, 1987 for a then-record $53.9 million?
"My Ear is Pastede Back On, Yey" -
"All I know about the guy is that he cut off his ear and painted 'Starry Night', which eventually became the design for a best-selling tie at the Museum Store." -
(#1 Wrong Answer on the Board: Sunflowers. Sotheby's sold that painting for a paltry $39.9 million. -AL)
"Sunflowers, I assume. My Sims have that hanging in their living room." -
"Sunflowers. I'm going to the state fair today, I hope to see record-height sunflowers. Yes, we have a sunflower-height competition. We are Michigan and we are boring." -
"Van Gogh drew irises way prettier than he did those mangy sunflowers. I mean, at least he drew irises when they were still alive, instead of all those droopy, dying sunflowers. Isn't that reversing the symbology a bit? Though maybe he should've tried painting violets. He could've gotten laid then." -
"I once heard someone ranting about how Van Gogh was the best painter ever because he put in the detail all in his paintings, even when the object in question was so far back in the perspective that the human eye wouldn't normally see it. That doesn't really say 'Greatest Painter Ever' to me, that says 'Far too much free time'." -
"I never had much of an eye for his art. But that's okay, because he didn't have an ear for music, so we're even." -
"Right now no one will buy this but someday it'll be worth a million dollars. I bet my ear on it!" -
"You know what would be worth $53.9 million dollars? A collage including Van Gogh's ear. You couldn't auction it on eBay because they don't let you sell body parts anymore, but Sotheby's probably doesn't share those same high standards." -
"Aha! I know where you're going with this! It's not Sunflowers, because that was Christies... my god, what a random fact to retain. The only other Picasso I can think of to be auctioned in the late eighties *and* which fits the theme is Irises, so I'll go with that. Fear my deductive reasoning!" -
(I do fear it, because you got two major facts wrong yet still got the right answer. Imagine what you could do with actual knowledge!! -AL)
"Irises. This was the first painting Van Gogh did after he entered an asylum following that nasty little ear-cutting incident. Interesting side note--the business tycoon who bought the painting couldn't afford the purchase price and defaulted. Sotheby's later sold the painting to the Getty Museum, and no one knows how much of a discount the museum got for buying it used." -
"I just bought his Purple Iris in a White Vase for my house last weekend." -
(Good God, the
(My dear
"I dunno, but I wish I had painted it. Except I wouldn't have wanted to live the entire life of Van Gogh. I'd have liked to just paint the painting, fast-forward through time, sell it and live off the profits. Actually, to hell with the painting, I'd just do the stealing and living off the profits. Sounds like a plan..." -
(
Correct Answer: Irises.
4. What is the name of Bo and Luke’s cousin?
"I thought they had two: 'Butt' and 'Cheek.' Twins, if I recall correctly." -
"That would be Lyzz. No, really. I have second cousins named Bo and Luke. They live somewhere in Texas and I've only met them once in my life." -
"Daisy 'I wore cut-offs so short that the look was named after me' Duke." -
"I believe she was named after the shorts, rather than the other way around, as many have surmised." -
"Catherine Bach! I mean come on - Jessica Simpson didn't have 1/4 of the body to fill out Daisy Duke's outfit like Catherine did. Makes me disgusted. Thats an affront to anyone who grew up admiring her ass in those shorts!" -
(That would be lots of us. -CV)
"Ditzy Duke? Close enough." -
"And now the Jessica Simpson hating starts. Dis you know she told reporters she feels that Daisy Duke is the role that she was born to play? That's just a little pathetic, considering how poorly the movie has done. And the fact that it's Dukes of Hazzard. Argh, set back the feminism another fifty years, please! Gr..." -
"Daisy. And for the record, Nancy Sinatra would wipe the floor with Jessica Simpson. And then after she was done, she'd eat some buffalo wings right in front of her." -
"Never put it together that she was their cousin until recently, and as a child always thought she was either Bo or Luke's girlfriend. Not that knowing Daisy's their cousin really changes that. It is a movie about the South." -
(+1, prejudicial regional stereotyping. -AL)
"David Duke - racist Governor of Mississippi, once a presidential candidate, but everyone recognized that he was just putting forward the political ideals of Boss Hogg." -
(Duke was never Governor of Mississippi, but he was a Louisiana State Representative & the Grand Wizard of the Ku Klux Klan. Not a nice man. -AL)
"Lukebo. Not a very imaginative family." -
"Bo is one of the lesser known gospels. Mathew, Mark, Bo, Luke, John." -
"I never actually watched the Dukes of Hazzard, but for a while during college I had a car whose driver-side door wouldn't open so I just left the windows open all the time and climbed in through the window. I got mighty sick of hearing Daisy Duke jokes, lemme tell ya." -
"If my computer starts to sing 'Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer, doooo....' next time I boot it up, I am blaming LJDQ." -
(We can live with that. -AL&CV)
(And now for this week's weirdest answer ....)
"Leia changed her name to Bo? Unless your talking about a different Luke... Nonsense! That's some blasphemous thinkin', right dere! BURN THEM!! And what do we burn besides LJ users? ... MORE LJ USERS!!! Oh, wait now, I'm an LJ user, aren't I? A flaw to every plan..." -
Correct Answer: Daisy Duke.
5. What is the name of the ship that sailed from Plymouth, England to Massachusetts in November 1620?
"They set off from Plymouth, and they landed in Plymouth. How lucky is that?" - lots of Quizlings & Eddie Izzard (not a Quizling)
"That was the original 'Survivor', if you think about it. Landed gentry and fops galore who didn't know diddly about breaking ground, raising crops, and building shelter with winter breathing down their necks in a place rife with danger and natives who were itching to kill them. Guaranteed 12% survival rate!" -
"And if their ship is anything like the Mayflower moving company, their belongings still haven't made it to the New World!" -
(There goes our chance for a corporate sponsorship. -AL)
"My grandmother's friend, who is Australian, once explained the difference in cultures thusly: 'We got the prisoners and you got the Puritans!'" -
"Remember when, in like, first grade, you spent an entire frigging month talking about the Pilgrims and the Mayflower? Remember how awesome that was? You got to like, make turkeys out of brown lunch sacks and tracings of your hands, and talk about how the Indians were really nice helpful, mostly, until we totally wiped them out, and then someone always made cornbread and brought it in, and that was cool, and you got to say 'Squanto' a lot." -
"What do april showers bring? May flowers! And what do mayflowers bring? The religiously-opressed-and-hoping-to-do-some-of-their-own-opressing-in-the-near-future Pilgrims!" -
"The Good Ship Marijuana, which made everyone happy when it burst aflame upon reaching shore." -
"I dunno, personally, I wasn't there. But we all know they were hippies. All of that 'We want relgious freedom, etc' was just a load of crap. They wanted rock music (Why else did they call it Plymouth Rock, c'mon people-)they wanted weed (That's where the trading with the Native Americans came in. And they wanted to be left the hell alone so they could meditate on the various rainbows that appeared over the ocean. Flower power for the pilgrims!" -
"The Marchflower and Aprilflower both sank en route, so they had the Juneflower sitting in dry dock just in case." -
(And submarines hadn't been invented yet, so TheHuntForRedOctoberflower was just a figment of their imagination. -CV)
"For some reason, I want to say the Cauliflower, the white broccoli. But you can’t really sail across the Atlantic in a white broccoli." -
(If I ever own a boat, I am going to name it the Cauliflower. -AL)
"Fucking illegal immigrants." -
"Candice Bergen starred as Sydney Biddle Barrows in The Mayflower Madam with Chris Sarandon who played Prince Humperdinck in the Princess Bride with Robin Wright who is married to Sean Penn who was in Mystic River with Kevin Bacon who appeared in Planes, Trains & Automobiles, which rejected ships as a viable form of transportation." -
"The Mayflower. I live in Massachusetts. Elementary school was basically a repetition of the same five facts about pilgrims and some reading, addition if you were lucky." -
"The Mayflower. Anyone with American citizenship who doesn't get this should get -100 for flunking history in high school... unless it's a trick question, in which case never mind." -
(CV, I don't think they trust us any more. -AL)
Correct Answer: The Mayflower.
"My ancestors were not on that boat. They came over later on an expedition in search of beer (even though they were skilled moonshiners, they could never get the beer recipe just right). That's why my family ended up settling in central Illinois (after that unfortunate horse thieving incident in Kentucky). Brewery in Miluwakee. Brewery in St. Louis. We'll never run out!" -
6. If you were a flower, what kind would you be?
"I think I lost my flower from riding horses when I was eight." -
"I would not be a flower, for I am a man and not soft or pretty. I also lack a pleasant odour but that's a different issue altogether." -
"I'm putting $10 on 42 write-ins of "Venus flytrap"." -
(Pony up. We only hit 33. -CV)
"One that doesn't get to pollinate often enough, sadly." -
"My hair is apparently dyed 'Dark Tulip'. So that is what I would be." -
"A pitcher plant, because, like the Venus Fly Trap, they trap and kill insects, but pitcher plants do so with slow, corrosive acid. It's like the super-villain of plants." -
"Clitoria Blue Pea" -
(Huh huh, you said 'clit'. -CV)
"Probably a cross between a Venus Flytrap and a Triffid. It'd be like..."I haven't done my homework? Rargh! I eat you and blind all the witnesses! Now tell me I need to do my homework, sucker!" and it'd be all cool and 'rargh!' and...yeah." -
"A rose...of HATE." -
"The Amorphophallus titanum, or "Corpse Flower." Every time I try to realize my vision, someone tells me I need to take a shower. Philistines." -
"Probably a thistle. More than just a little thorny here and there." -
"The kind that all the chick flowers dig, and which gets all the hot two-chick-flowers-on-one-guy-flower action." -
"
" - (+1, Robotech. -1, Geek Of The Week. -CV)
"I would be one of those acid-firing clown flowers like the Joker has. Burninate your face!" -
"I'd be one of those flowers from Star Trek that got Spock high. Because, dude, if it could get a Vulcan high, regular people would be even better. I'd go around spraying people with pollen and causing havoc and wacky hijinks." -
"
" - Correct Answer: "I wouldn't. I'd be the bee." -
All right, that's enough of that. Time for AL to watch some more (American) football. And time for CV to work some more weekend hours. Heh heh heh. New quiz tomorrow, kids!
Rock on,
CV&AL.
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:40 am (UTC)no subject
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:44 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:45 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:46 am (UTC)Fucking flowers.
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:47 am (UTC)And sometimes, the intarweb just sucks.
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:49 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:49 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:50 am (UTC):-)
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:51 am (UTC)I saw an outdoor presentation of that this summer. The football game is one of my favourite parts.
After the "Titus Andronicus" Cooking Show, of course.
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:51 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:52 am (UTC)The medieval re-enactment society should get down to reliving any of the battles. Goodness knows they've held many a re-enactment in the clearing where the new residential blocks are being built, although now, I guess there won't be any space any more.
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:52 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:53 am (UTC)I'm proud of myself for refraining from Jessica Simpson bashing.
The girl has enough problems. Can't even dress herself and doesn't know the difference between tuna and chicken. Sad, really.
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:54 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:55 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:56 am (UTC)So sad I missed that. :(
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:56 am (UTC)Or so legend says it was not planned that way ...
you see....
Date: 2005-08-22 08:57 am (UTC)Feh.
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:57 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2005-08-22 08:57 am (UTC)Also, your icon is freaky.
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Date: 2005-08-22 08:58 am (UTC)