LJ Daily Answers: 23 May 2005

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

"Let me say right off the bat that I'm appalled that the theme this week doesn't concern Star Wars! And you call yourselves fans. I’m shocked, LJDQ, shocked." - marseverlasting

We are fans. But let's face it, Ep I and Ep II were not exactly the crown jewels in the Star Wars collection. We'll wait and see...

"GAH! You just had to remind me of the freaking Chem final I failed last night, didn't you? NOT COOL." - soimpossible414

That's right. Chemistry, in this case gaseous elements, was the theme of the week. Not Star Wars.



1. General Zod hailed from which distant world?

"Ooo Help Me General Zod!
General Zod, General Zod!
General Zod, General Zod!
General Zod, General Zod!
Oh, General Zod
General Zod, General Zod!
Clark: What's wrong with me?
General Zod: I think you're crazy
Clark: I want a second opinion.
Dr. Zaius: You're also lazy." - alliterator

(+1, The Simpsons. -CV)

"Is that anything like General Zed from the Power Rangers? No. Wait...Zed was a bad guy, wasn't he? Or was he the blobby head? They never did explain where he was from though. He just appeared one day with five color coordinated giant robots that were waiting for sassy and responsible teenagers to dress up in spandex and helmets to run them." - chrysoberyl

(I'm going to have to give you a -1 for knowing too much about the Mighty Morphing Power Rangers. trishalynn, you too. -CV)

"Was he the fish-guy from the original Star Wars movies?" - 3jane

(-1 for confusing General Zod with Admiral Ackbar. For shame! -CV)

"Is that one of the weird sci-fi kinda guys from Flash Gordon?...I know it's not but I'll do that "FLASH! AH-A!" any chance I can get." - astria_nova

(That was General Kala. But +1 anyway because "Flash Gordon" is the best Queen song ever. -CV)

"THERE IS NO ZOD. THERE IS ONLY ZUUUUL." - noelleleithe

(+1, Ghostbusters. -CV)

"I read Zod as Zorg, and that painfully remined me of that horrible disney movie with the talking toys. The only character I liked from that was Zorg. But I have no idea what cartoon planet Zorg is from. Maybe the planet of potatoes. I remember a bunch of potato people in that movie." - shadowkeeper

"Zodzabar. Before he rose to the level of General, he was a chef for the Zodzabarbarians, a small rebel group that was trying to bring anarchy to Zodzabar." - the_wanlorn

"I'd have to say the distant world of England. Isn't 'zod' what they call the letter 'Z' over there?" - halo4

(Zed. Zed's dead, baby. Zed's dead. -CV)

"Courascent? Or is this a Hitchhiker's thing?" - tofusquirrel

(Coruscant is Star Wars, and we're out of Hitchhiker's mojo. +1 for being wrong three times in one answer, though. That takes skill. -CV)

"General Zod was on A Different World? I lost interest when Dwayne Wayne and Whitley became an item." - unamundamour

"I was so excited to see this question, it's about something I know, so I'll actually have the right answer. I LOVE Superman! Even when it doesn't make sense! General Zod is from... from... I can't remember." - isadore

(Worst Superman fan ever. -CV- See below.)

"General Zod is that dude from Superman, right? Which would make the answer Krypton. I think. But krypton is a fake element. And you guys would never stoop to using fakes. Right?" - marag

(No, we'd never stoop to using fakes. Ever. -AL&CV)

"What was up with Zod anyway? I mean, he was always so hung up on this guy who must've been ahead of him in a line once or something. He always kept saying 'Neil before Zod!' I never got that one." - umbralcorax
"Zod's problem was his approachability, see? If he'd told people that he'd always be "twirling, twirling, twiiiiirling towards freedom!", he might have got some play." - whitetower

"did Christopher Reeves ever wonder why it was all he got to wear was a blue bodysuit, and the 3 villians from Krypton all got to dress in leather? And why weren't they given whips?? Gen Zod would have made a wicked Dom with the right whip." - dhutch

"if they ever remake Superman 2, they need to Photoshop Superman and Zod's heads onto Neo and Agent Smith, and just use the end scene of Matrix 3, as chaosvizier and I realized at exectly the same moment." - fizrep

"Houston." - blu_matt

"You ever wonder why the remnants of planet Krypton were all dangerous to Kryptonians? Picture living on a world that's toxic to you. Maybe that's why they evolved the ability to fly; they couldn't touch the ground safely. That would also make them the only species to develop the "hot lava" game before language." - cmzero

"Krypton, land of assholes. I saw a great page once about how everyone from Krypton in the comics who shows up on Earth is a complete asshole, except Superman who was raised here. The author concluded that, if some other alien race destroyed Krypton deliberately, it was well-justified." - rikchik

(Actually, there is evidence that Superman is also an asshole. -AL)

Correct Answer: Krypton

"KNEEL BEFORE ZOD!" - bundles of you

(+1, because that is also the correct response. -CV)



2. What device was first applied to the island of Eniwetok on 1 November 1952?

"I cannot speak its name, only demonstrate it to you in interpretive dance." - alexmegami

"since I don't know the answer I will just give you this: http://www.storewars.org/flash/." - overiescanbefun

"The Bedazzler, making it the first island covered in sequins by a young Christo." - drbear

(That Christo needs to lay off the islands and get a better hobby. -CV)

"The Iludium Q-37 explosive space detonator?" - tiercel

(Space Modulator, young lady. But +1 for an excellent Looney Toons quote. -CV)

"I don’t think it’s fair to call The Skipper a 'device' even if he was sort of a tool to Gilligan." - empressvesica

(He was a foil to Gilligan's shenanigans, hence a comedic device used to enhance the program's nature. Too bad, Alan Hale, you're a device. And a large one at that. -CV)

"Telemarketing.
'Hello, would you like to save a lot of money on your electrical bill?'
'Tongo, get the soup pot.'
I am now officially going to hell. But thinking of telemarketers being eaten by cannibals just makes me sad for the cannibals happy." - lots42

"An itsy-bitsy, teeny-weeny, yello polka dot bikini?" - sabine791110

(No, that was the atoll. But nice music reference anyway. -CV)

"In a heroic effort to cure the men of Eniwetok Island of sad-looking, droopy weenies, bikinis were introduced to the island. Now the men of Eniwetok Island all walk around, fists on hips, with huge trouser tents and big cheesy grins." - linguafranca

"the urge to simply take familiar looking letters and make a lame Ewok joke is overwhelming. But I won't, because 40 other people will do it for me." - whitetower

(Actually, only 28. Here's three of the better ones... -CV)

"That's some kind of anagram for Ewok Net I, so I gather a gigantic electrified rock proof net was deployed and all the rogue ewoks were rounded up there and shipped to zoos for proper display." - mcclintock
"Eniwetok? Is that where all the Ent Wives and Ewoks went?" - jerica
"Ents and Ewoks aren't even from the same universe silly, so how can there be an island of Ent-ewok? I call shennanigans." - chrysoberyl

"The Genesis device thingie from Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan. Gene Roddenberry had a friend that discovered the secret notes from the 50s, and that's how he came up with his idea." - wendynat

"U2 showed us how to dismantle atomic bombs. I wonder if they know how to dismantle hydrogen bombs, too?" - pride4u2

(Is there nothing Bono cannot do? -CV)

"The hydrogen bomb. It worked much better than the helium bomb, which just left their targets sounding funny for a few minutes." - lyzz13

"Would that be the hydrogen bomb? I know the atom bomb was first tested at Bikini Atoll, because my 9th grade history teacher showed us a film about it. When he announced the title, the guys in the guys were all excited because they thought he might be showing porn." - soimpossible414
(several moments later...)
"That's supposed to be 'the guys in the class.' Although, I think my typo gave it an interesting new meaning. Lord knows I would have enjoyed the class more if there was gay sex going on." - soimpossible414

"Now then, Dmitri, you know how we've always talked about the possibility of something going wrong with the Bomb... The *Bomb*, Dmitri... The *hydrogen* bomb!" - hybridutensil

(+1, Dr. Strangelove. -CV)

"I like that. 'Applied.' It sounds like the directions on the back of facial moisturizer or something. 'Apply hydrogen bomb liberally; Massage into face and neck using small circles.'" - ihateusernames
"People very rarely ever apply happy devices to nations. You never hear of dropping dildos on countries." - whiski_sour

"Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hydrogen Bomb of Eniwetok towards thy island, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it." - cmzero

(+1, Monty Python and the Holy Grail. -CV)

"The Hydrogen or H-Bomb, which was developed after focus groups showed that The Flourine Bomb (aka The F-Bomb) would be hard to market to the American public as a kinder, gentler way to destroy populations." - marasca

("More Deaths, And Whiter Teeth!" didn't sell well to the Joint Chiefs of Staff either. -CV)

Correct Answer: The Hydrogen Bomb



3. What cable television network, founded in part by Geraldine Laybourne and Oprah Winfrey, is on a mission "to bring women... the edgiest, most innovative entertainment on television"?

"I've always thought Hee-Haw was the most edgiest, innovative entertainment on television." - jacesan

"do women need their own tv channel? Can't I watch the same tv as teh boyz?" - tronella

"Playgirl Network. Nekkid men all the time! Nekkid dangling bits is what it's all about. And hot new recipes. Hosted by the Naked Chef, o'course." - dracothelizard

(-1, "nekkid dangling bits". -CV)

"The Ben And Jerry's Channel." - tofusquirrel

(Only available once a month. -CV)

(Whoa, a man making PMS jokes? Do you have a death wish? -AL)

"Geraldine Laybourne and Oprah Winfrey ... GLOW?" - packbat

(Alas, the GLOW Girls never got their own network. And that's a damn shame. -CV)

"Lifetime, the network for women. However, I don't know a single woman who actually watches Lifetime. So maybe it's just the network for middle-aged housewives." - thevioletangel

"It has to be Lifetime. Beware the perils of Lifetime. No matter how much fun you poke at it, if you happen to flip to it and leave it there for more than a minute, you are doomed to an entire day of sappy and/or angsty programming. Did anyone ever watch the one where Rizzo from Grease had a lesbian daughter and was all 'GRR HOMOSEXUALITY' and after heartbreak and angst, she eventually joined P-FLAG or somesuch, and there was no more heartbreak and angst to be had? (That is, until the movie ended and they showed one about, I don't know, a battered woman killing her husband after she'd had enough.)" - duia

"Did you just use 'edgy' and 'Oprah' in the same sentence?" - active_apathy
"Oxygen Network, which is about as edgy as a blob of pudding." - marasca

"like the gas, some claim they can't live without it." - n5iln
"Thanks to Oprah, I've proven that a person really can live without Oxygen." - whiski_sour

"Doesn't it have that Canadian sex-talkin' granny show on it? That show's WRONG, man, but funny." - kdlawler27
"I wish Oxygen were nothing but Sue Johansen. I love that horny little Canadian." - kayepants

"Answer me this, what the fuck does oxygen have to do with women? Sure, they breathe it, but so do men. What's next, 'Arsenic: the Channel for Men'?" - gethsemane

"As a 2 X chromosomer, even I think it should have been called CO, sure puts me to sleep. Well, except the fact they show “Center Stage” four times a week. I, er, have a bit of a weakness for movies about dancing. *hangs head in shame*" - empressvesica

"As opposed to Spike, which is on a mission 'to bring men…the raunchiest, most offensive entertainment on television'. Although I love me some MXC (Most Extreme Elimination Challenge). Rock on, Kenny Blankenship!" - slickrickt
"The worst channel on cable. Women's entertainment, my ass! I don't know what they define as 'woman', but crying all day over sob stories isn't my idea of fun. I prefer SpikeTV and their MXC show. Now THAT'S entertainment." - ladyisabella

(Most Extreme Elimination Challenge is, indeed, one of the high points of television. God bless the nation of Japan, and everyone inside it. Even Godzilla. -CV)

Correct Answer: Oxygen Media

"Top five rejected names for the Oxygen network:
- Estrogenesis
- A Night at the Oprah
- Emotovision
- PMSNBC
- 'I Can't Breathe In this Thing!'" - captainsblog



4. Name that song and artist!
"Sky blue gets dark enough
To see the colors of the city lights
A trail of ruby red and diamond white
Hits her like a sunrise
...
She's always buzzing just like ..."

"Based on results from past quizzes, I'm going with the high percentage answer of it being a song by Sting." - buzz and several others

"PLASTIC JESUS, PLASTIC JESUS, RIDING ON THE DASHBOARD OF MY CAR!" - tiercel

"William Shatner doing Lucy in the Sky with Diamonds." - maeritrae, wiredwizard, cmzero, soimpossible414

(You four are far too familiar with the William Shatner version as opposed to, say, the more classic Beatles version. -CV)

"Zartan and the Dreadnoks, with their self titled debut song 'Cold Slither'" - lots42

(You know, I'm going to give you a +2 for an impressively obscure G.I.Joe reference, and for making me feel better about the fact that I have had the lyrics to their song embedded in my skull for the past 20 years. -CV)

"Yet another relatively talented boy-with-guitar-singer/songwriter who sold out." - hippiedancer

"I can't make a joke about John Mayer. He's my local-boy. I love you, Johnny! Call me!" - kaerusattori

"May I just say that I am kinda weird about this song, because (as a fellow Atlantian) I have partied on Peachtree St. many a time. I have been buzzed like whoa, but never like Neon." - lexsboo

(You're from Atlantis? -CV)

(AtlanTA. -AL)

"Neon, John Mayer. I saw him on a VH1 show called once “World’s F-Ugliest Artists” or something, which surprised me, because he’s hot. Oh well, silly me being attracted to talent and personality more than ripped muscles and well-placed tattoos. I should really learn to believe what the television tells me—- it would make life so much easier." - scarlethue

"You know, this is scary. I have a woman i work with who drives around in this dark blue neon. She calls it the super neon becuase she hauls everything in it. Even a Church Cross. A CROSS! IN A NEON! aaargggghhhhh!!!!! John Mayer save us all!" - dhutch

Correct Answer: "Neon", by John Mayer

"Where do they come up with these lyrics, anyway? It's like someone got a pile of magnetic poetry and fooled around on their refrigerator for about 10 minutes and said, 'oooh. That sounds all mystical. Let's go with that.'" - dorei



5. What is the technical term for the virtual intoxication, sometimes called the "Rapture of the Deep", that divers may experience from breathing compressed air at great depths?

"Virtual intoxication? Used to be only real intoxication was good enough for the LJDQ. And we liked it!" - active_apathy

"Can't you get the same feeling doing Nitrous Oxide whippets?" - deza

"'Rapture of the Deep'? Is that when the great fisherman in the sky will retrieve all of the pious fish (both living and dead) and take them up to heaven? 'Heaven' of course being the aquatic term for 'fish fry'." - dorsey
"Rapture of the Deep? Isn't that what happens when you take some ectasy and sleep with a mermaid?" - sabine791110
"'Rapture of the Deep' sounds like spelunking porn." - agreenbunny
" read that as the 'Rapture of the Depp'. All these Johnny Depp fangirls are scrambling my brains!" - timydamonkey

"Seriously, that's just scary. What happens if you get intoxicated way down there? You wake up not remembering anything and then discover you're pregnant with guppies?" - kokopellinelli

"I don't know, but I have plenty of friends who'd be happy to try it. One of them, reading over my shoulder, has now decided she wants to make a bong out of an oxygen tank. See what a bad influence you are?" - muzzyfeverlint

"Yankee Beer Syndrome. You're not really intoxicated, but you still have the taste that a badger has wiped its arse in your mouth in the morning. And a sore head." - blu_matt

"Auto-erotic asphyxiation. It also explains why their dive suits need to be cleaned out. A lot." - yueni

"I still think those guys just managed to find a way to smuggle pot underwater. I like the idea that they try to eat a shark because they have the munchies." - silent_r_infork

"'Hey, hey, got any nitrogen?'
'No, man, I don't deal in that stuff.'
'But I heard from Jimmy that you got it, man, and I need a fix.'
'Naw, man, I'm straight up fluoride. Get it from the dentist, fool doesn't know what it sells for out here.'" - drachechan

"Nitrogen narcosis? I have this vision of a club in Shibuya with waitresses in PVC skirts where they cram you into a hyperbaric chamber and you get to pay $200 to spend 15 minutes jammed in next to some plastered salaryman with his very own Hello Kitty SCUBA gear." - principia_coh

(That's some imagination you've got there. -AL)

"In my SCUBA certification course when the instructor was telling us about nitrogen narcosis, she shared a story of a friend of hers who got so loopy from it that when she saw a grouper (a large tropical fish) she started trying to share her air with it because, well, the fsh didn't hane air, it was going to die! Fortunately, someone found the friend and puller her up. The moral of the story is: Fish don't need air." - marasca

"It's nitrogen narcosis, slangily referred to as "being narced". When I earned my deep dive certification (part of the advanced dive course for me), we did it in a 80-90 foot deep natural cistern. Factoring in altitude, going to the bottom translated to about 115-120 feet at sea level. I was narced out of my mind. I was laying full-out on the bottom insisting to my instructor that I wasn't touching said bottom at all (which was bad, because it stirred up silt) while trying to adjust my buoyancy with all the grace of a drunken monkey." - gethsemane

Correct Answer: Nitrogen Narcosis

"Which is why they always tell you to have a designated diver." - slickrickt



6. What special element are you made out of?

"I am currently made of rage. Yes it is on the periodic table. Okay, so I added it in crayon. Sh'up." - chaobell

"I am pollution. Take that you nancy Captain Planet do-gooders." - limegreen_sloth

"'nudium' -- that's why I don't wear pants." - kaliopi

"Irony." - tombeaux

"Schadenfreudium." - duckalmighty

(One of our favorite elements. -AL&CV)

"White chocolate, I'm finger licking good" - shes_precious

"Chocolate Frosted Sugar Bombs." - snarkymarcy

(+1, Calvin and Hobbes. -CV)

"I'm made of 100% penisium, baby!" - krick

(Ladies, take note. -AL)

"The element of surprise. If I told you why, that would ruin it – now wouldn’t it?" - empressvesica

"The element of surprise! Surprise and fear, fear and surprise, and a ruthless efficiency and an almost fanatical devotion to the pope, oh damn I'll come back in." - cheezdanish

"I am made out of adamantium. But hush. Wolverine and the Brotherhood are both after my special shiny metal ass, see." - ewacat

"According to my wife, if I've eaten sausage, mushroom, and pepperoni pizza, I'm composed primarily of methane." - dhutch

"I am a hydrocarbon because I enjoy spaghetti." - puredeadthingy

(Non sequitur. Post hoc ergo propter hoc. -CV)

"I'd be arsnic, just so people could sing, 'That girl is poison!' about me. I've always wanted someone to write a song about me. This will have to do." - marasca

"Mercury. 's why I'm so loony, you know. Mad as a hatter, me." - profsparky

"Tungsten. Simply because its symbol is W, coming from the old German name for it, which is Wolfram, which means "wolf foam" cos it eats away at tin during smelting, as the wolf eats the sheep. This amuses me greatly." - ataralas
"In my high school chemistry class we had to memorize the periodic table- the way we learned Tungsten went as follows. Tungstun- W- *opens mouth- sticks tongue out- shakes had back and forth* - waggle." - molliejoy

"Carbon, enriched in ¹³C due to the preferential uptake of ¹³C by plants, which makes δ¹³C (that's delta-¹³C if the Unicode doesn't come out right) a useful proxy for past ocean productivity.
Bet you wish you did oceanography now." - bobjanova

(Although the number 13 was used amply in your answer, we'll only give you -1 for your Geek Of The Week-class response. -AL&CV)

"I think you are refering to carbon here, but I guess you could mean H2O. Water is pretty special you know and we don't want to hurt it's feelings by leaving it out." - ladyisabella

(Sorry. Water is not all that special. It covers most of the planet and threatens us with flooding and tsunamis and pool parties. No credit for you. Also, it's not an element, but we'll get into that another time. -CV)

(CV, you're such an aquaphobe. -AL)

"According to the great Tom Lehrer, I am made of antimonyarsenicaluminumselenium hydrogenoxygennitrogenrhenium nickelneodymiumneptuniumgermanium ironamericiumrutheniumuranium Europiumzirconiumlutetiumvanadium lanthanumosmiumastatineradium goldprotactiniumindiumgallium iodinethoriumthuliumthallium yttriumytterbiumactiniumrubidium borongadoliniumniobiumiridium strontiumsiliconsilversamarium bismuthbrominelithiumberylliumbarium holmiumheliumhafniumerbium phosphorusfranciumfluorineterbium manganesemercurymolybdenummagnesium dysprosiumscandiumceriumcesium leadpraseodymiumplatinumplutonium palladiumpromethiumpotassiumpolonium tantalumtechnetiumtitaniumtellodium cadmiumcalciumchromiumcurium sulfurcaliforniumfermiumberkelium mendeleviumeinsteiniumnobelium argonkryptonneonradonxenonzincrhodium chlorinecarboncobaltcoppertungstentinsodium" - hemloche, marag

(I haven't heard that song in ages, back when I listened to the Dr. Demento Show every Sunday night. +1. For those of you who aren't familiar, it's sung to the tune of "Modern Major General". And if that wasn't bad enough, captainsblog provided the counterpart... -CV)

"There's acrimony, allergies, with irony, serenity,
Hyperbole, imagining and nitpicking and whinium,
And nickel, dimes and quarters and outside there are geraniums,
And ironing and laundering and don't forget to vaacium,
Euphoria and beerium, Paxilium and valium,
And lanceaboil and osmosis and vaseline and radio,
And gold but not enough of it and often indigestium, (gasp)
And iodine and roll-on in the mediciny chestium" - captainsblog

"We are all made from starstuff." - mcclintock

(In the Museum of Natural History in New York City, Tom Hanks narrates one of the planetarium shows and concludes with this line. It's cheesy in and of itself, but when he says it, it's a thousand times worse. Damn you, Tom Hanks! -CV)

"this reminds me of when we moved into our house and there was this big chunk of graphite sitting in the basement. A few weeks later, I found my husband examining it with a borrowed Geiger counter. When I calmly asked why, he explained that it was a piece of a dampening rod from a nuclear reactor. I was so busy shrieking that I never got around to asking a) how the heck he knew that or b) how the heck a dampening rod would have gotten into our new basement." - marag

(Well don't leave us in suspense - how did he know? Where did it come from? Inquiring Quizlings want to know. -AL)

"HOLY COW I JUST REMEMBERED! GENERAL ZOD IS FROM KRYPTON. Go me!" - isadore

Correct Answer: "I'm made of Sexybitchium. It's about as far from a noble gas as possible." - fizrep

That concludes this week's episode of the LJDQ. Make sure you tune in next week, when angledge & chaosvizier will actually BE IN THE SAME ROOM whilst compiling the Answers. Will it make a difference? Or will that just be the liquor talking? YOU DON'T KNOW.

Rock on,

CV&AL.