LJ Daily Answers: 21 May 2012

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

RED BUTTONS! REDD FOXX! RED GRANGE!

1. What character is the narrator of the film "The Shawshank Redemption"?

"How bad a person does not knowing this make me?" - sskipstress

(About this bad: {____________________________________]. -CV)

"It was from the point of view of the mouse. Wait, not that mouse..." - love2loveher

"Since it is told in the first person, I'd say Adam" - i_calql8

"Morgan Freeman" - I said CHARACTER, not ACTOR
"The Penguin Guy" - Better, but still.

"GLaDOS" - alfvaen

(He did not get any cake. -CV)

"Black Manta" - lots42

"Must be Mr. Shawshank" - primavera

"Ishmael" - ntlespino

(That was that other narrator. -CV)

“Stephen King. Let's face it, *all* the characters are Stephen King in one way or another." - jmthane

"Did you know Morgan Freeman also narrated the Conan the Barbarian movie from last year? I imagine him saying, 'Now, Conan had few wants in life. He liked to crush his enemies, see them driven before him, and to hear the lamentation of their women. A simple man, really, Conan.'" - mandydax

(That would have been better than that movie. -CV)

Correct Answer: Ellis "Red" Redding



2. Marvel Comics character Johann Schmidt is better known as whom?

"Isn't that John Jacob Jingleheimer's brother?" - sskipstress, etcet, laughingacademy, ifeedformula

"With a German name? Most likely Admiral General Alois Schnitzlgruber, doing Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation of Avengers" - germankitty

(+1, Borat. Well, only +.5; crappy film. -CV)

"Bach, the composer bad ass enough to impress Arnold" - seferin, islandofwords

"I would say that a name like that has to be a bad guy, but who would fear someone with a name like 'Schmidt?'" - love2loveher

(See The Matrix, Agent Smith, where Smith is just the English translation of Schmidt. And he was fearful indeed. -CV)

“Black Widow. Yeah, it's not just the hair color that's fake." - lots42

"Elrond of Rivendell" - JENNA_THORN
"Queen of the Desert" - cjtremlett
"Agent Smith" - domestik_fucker

(Sorta. -CV)

"Painful Eczema" - mandydax

"The Black Panzer" - i_calql8

(T'Challa would like a word with you outside. -CV)

"The Scarlet Pimpernel" - wiredwizard

"When he had too many laxatives he was Johann Schitt. When he was cold he was Johann Midtts. When he flashed his crotch at the paparazzi he was Lohan Schmidt. But most of the time, he was just plain old roter Schädel" - drunken_hedghog

(You forgot one:)

"The Johann, as played by Adam Sandler in You Don't Mess with the Johann" - ANONYMOUS

Correct Answer: The Red Skull



3. Fun with bad lyrics! Name the song and the band:
I got a girl, say she long and tall
She sleeps in the kitchen with her feets in the hall

"You know when you're young and you sleep with the band because it's something to do? Well, that band performed this song." - sskipstress

(...no, I don't know. Tell me more about that. -CV)

“You're dating a cat?" - drunken_hedghog

“Does she wear a short skirt and a looooooooong jacket?" - islandofwords

"Why does she sleep in the kitchen? Are you expecting her to make you a midnight snack?" - la_trombonista, ntlespino, etcet

"It sounds like the GOP... she's in the kitchen, are her feet bare?" - thepikey

"If she slept in the kitchen with her feet in the hall in MY house, she'd had to make 3 right turns. That wouldn't be terribly comfortable, methinks. Unless you're like Gumby." - ifeedformula

"That's... really tall. Maybe she was who Fezzik dreamed about?" - frequencyshift

"There's an Olive Oyl joke in there, but that would be a jeep shot." - i_calql8

"I don't know, but I can tell you it's not about me. I'm like a hobbit. I even have humongous feet. It's ridiculous" - domestik_fucker

"Where is her head, in the oven? (Oh too soon?)" - akiyasan

(Never too soon here. -CV)

“I got a weiner dog, she long and thin, Her nose in the Azores and her tail in Berlin." - ANONYMOUS

Correct Answer: "They're Red Hot" by Robert Johnson (not the Red Hot Chili Peppers, but wouldn't that have been great?)



4. John and Jack Marston are the protagonists of which 2010 video game?

"Mario Brothers Smash" - JENNA_THORN
"Super Marston Brothers" - love2loveher, tinamachina

"Marston Needs Women" - drbear

"Wait, video games still exist? I'm still stuck trying to find the princess. Why did she move to another castle? Was it not pretty enough?" - akiyasan

“James Marsters was in an episode of Torchwood, which parallels Doctor Who, which means that the doctoral brothers must be Holmes and Moriarty. It's elementary, my dear LoveLlama." - etcet

"Pacmen. A thrilling game about moving to a new house" - seferin

(And its sequel, Super PACmen, about moving to a new White House. -CV)

"Pokémon Red, they're the new Team Rocket" - germankitty

(A Red Rocket, I dare say. "Red Rocket, Meowth! Red Rocket!" -CV)

"Red dead Fred bed head zed fed lead ... I think I got off track somewhere in there" - cjtremlett

(Dr. Seuss called from the grave; he wants his schtick back, and your brains. -CV)

"I just didn't see the appeal of a video game set in the wild, wild west. Although I heard you could leave a woman tied up on train tracks. That sounds neat" - frequencyshift

"Reddit Redemption" - thepikey

Correct Answer: Red Dead Redemption



5. What organization was founded by Jean-Henri Dunant in 1863?

"I want rustlers, cut throats, murderers, bounty hunters, desperados, mugs, pugs, thugs, nitwits, halfwits, dimwits, vipers, snipers, con men, Indian agents, Mexican bandits, muggers, buggerers, bushwhackers, hornswogglers, horse thieves, bull dykes, train robbers, bank robbers, ass-kickers, shit-kickers and Methodists." - barbarienne

(+1, Blazing Saddles. -CV)

"The Spanish Inquisition. No wonder no one expected them" - i_calql8

(Making them French was the smartest thing the Pope ever did. -CV)

"Umbrella Corp" - JENNA_THORN

"Dunkin' Donuts, natch" - islandofwords

"The CSA Re-Enactors Association, getting a head-start on glorifying the losers of the War of Northern Aggression" - etcet

"How do you say 'Justice League' in French?" - la_trombonista

"SPecial Executive for Counter-intelligence, Terrorism, Revenge and Extortion" - seferin

"The 'Don't Shoot! This Means You, Asshole!' Committee of 1863" - drunken_hedghog

(Oh Bullwinkle, that trick never works! -CV)

"LJDQ" - lots42

(After I overthrew him, there were a lot more "make fun of the French" jokes in the quiz. Trufax. -CV)

"The Red Shirts - they all died gloriously" - cjtremlett

"Sorry, I got to Jean-hyphen and had an accident:
" - mandydax

"L'organisation pour la poursuite de la panthère rose. (Theme song: 'Dunant dunant, dunant, dunant dunant dunant dunant dunannnnnnnt...')" - laughingacademy, drbear

(+1, The Pink Panther. +1, excellent theme song pun. -CV)

Correct Answer: International Committee of the Red Cross

"it would more likely be Red Religious Symbol of Choice" - germankitty



6. Blood: useful, terrifying, delicious, or other? Tell us what you think!

"You're talking to a woman undergoing menopause. You can't handle what I think about blood!" - germankitty

"You know me--I can't make a blood-related pun without a typo." - i_calql8
"Oh, positive I should think. I guess it might be negative. A negative might be for people with hemophilia, but we should really try to be positive. AB fab." - islandofwords

"I particularly like how it carries oxygen around to the different parts of my body. Though it seems to be falling down on the job today, particularly regarding the delivery of oxygen to my brain." - barbarienne

"A useful caffeine delivery system" - seferin

(And an equally useful gin delivery system. -CV)

“It's actually very pretty, I think. In single shiny drops or fascinating splatters. Is that creepy of me to say so?" - cjtremlett

“What do I think? Either he's dead or my watch has stopped." - kenshardik

"Well, if it's dragon's blood, then it's useful, having 12 uses as it does, other blood not so much" - wiredwizard

"Vital for vampires, and without vampires, television is useless, therefore blood is vital to television" - love2loveher

"" - ifeedformula, frequencyshift

"Depends, am I bathing in it, throwing it over other people, satisfying my vampiric lusts or trying to keep the damned stuff inside of me?" - drunken_hedghog

(Why can't it be all four? -CV)

"I drink your LJDQ! I DRINK IT AAAAAAALLLL UP! SCHLLLLLLLURP!" - ANONYMOUS

(+1, There Will Be Blood. No, cut that to +.5, again, crappy movie. -CV)

"The commercially available synthetic blood products aren't too bad, but nothing compares to sucking it directly from the neck of a 13-year old virgin" - sskipstress

"Surprisingly shitty as ink. Why infernal contracts are signed in it remains a mystery" - etcet

(Satan's ink-importing business had some serious snafus a few centuries back, and they never really recovered. -CV)

"much more useful on the inside than the outside" - jmthane, ntlespino

"If it's so full of iron, why does it taste like pennies?" - mandydax, la_trombonista

"Something I used to wake up choking on. NOT delicious" - primavera

(I had that problem too once. They called it tuberculosis. Danger, Will Robinson, Danger! -CV)

Correct Answer: "Always in short supply. Donate!" - tinamachina



And there you have it. It's a sword day, a red day!

Thanks for playing, as always, and we hope your May is going well. Soon the summer months will be upon us, and then it's crazy time! Well, no crazier than normal, really, but still. Summer!

Rock On!

AL&CV&LL

Comments

[fragbert.livejournal.com]

"You know me--I can't make a blood-related pun without a typo." -

Why is there no attribution to this MARVELOUS pun!?!

-1 to CV for a heinous typo of his own.

[germankitty]

Wow. i_calql8 is clairvoyant now -- yesterday, we were both bemoaning the fact that we felt spectacularly unfunny and were expecting major suckage ... whereupon he predicted we'd likely get foursies.

AND HE WAS RIGHT!!!

(He also predicted I'd pwn him -- which I did, thanks to the +0.5 for Borat. Whee!!!)

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

HTML Fail! Fixed now! Cheeky buggers.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Edited now; I left his name off of one answer. I'm afraid he just got up by one pip. Sorry, my bad. ;-)

[germankitty]

Not fair! *pouts*

...

Ah! I'm part of the "Morgan Freeman" groupthink, IIRC. So it's even Stephens again ...

[raphsody606.livejournal.com]

I liked the picture just as much when I hadn't scrolled down the whole way when it read "Is he...." "That shit"

[ifeedformula.livejournal.com]

+3...not bad for a week where I was feeling spectacularly unwitty. :)

[i-calql8.livejournal.com]

Just a second, there, professor...no name next to groupthink = no credit on groupthink. Otherwise, it throws my whole LJDQ stats spreadsheet into a deathspin.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Bwahahaha, that makes the picture even better.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

These things happen. Surprise funnies!

[wiredwizard.livejournal.com]

2 out of 6... =sighs=

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

It's still good! Plus, you've got Sexy Female Jesus there, and that's worth way more than 33%.

[i-calql8.livejournal.com]

Wowsers...I can haz winning Powerball pix nao?

Of course, the part I didn't quite predict was the HTML fail that occured afterwards.

In the mean time...FIVE, bitches!!!

[germankitty]

^

[lovellama.livejournal.com]

“James Marsters was in an episode of Torchwood, which parallels Doctor Who, which means that the doctoral brothers must be Holmes and Moriarty. It's elementary, my dear LoveLlama." - etcet

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Yeah, somehow there was an HTML bork when I tried to copy your image. I almost replaced it with the velociraptor one, because raptors are always funny.

[i-calql8.livejournal.com]

Hey, don't hate the statistician, hate the non-biased data-gathering process!

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

It's unpredictable! Inconceivable! Incredible! Unexpectable! SHENANIGANIZERS!

[barbarienne.livejournal.com]

I got two, which is like my lowest score to date, but considering that I phoned it in, I'll take it. Thank you for not rewarding my laziness.

[barbarienne.livejournal.com]

Oh, wait, there's a +1 for the movie quote, bringing my total to my standard 3. Hooray!

Still, I promise more effort next time.

[i-calql8.livejournal.com]

Truly a red-letter day.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

At least you had the good taste to quote a funny movie in your lazy efforts. ;-)

[islandofwords.livejournal.com]

Whoo, two and a group think! And I would like to submit that in nearly every film he's in, Morgan Freeman plays Morgan Freeman. Especially when he was the president and god.

[islandofwords.livejournal.com]

Ahh, no, I got three quotes! Three! And a groupthink! AWW YEAH.

[islandofwords.livejournal.com]

...Make that two groupthinks. What is this I don't even know,

[raphsody606.livejournal.com]

Leaving out Twilight makes EVERYTHING better.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

You're getting better every minute! You're like Skynet, only hopefully more benevolent.

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

It does indeed. Sparkly shenaniganizers, you have no place here!

[mandydax.livejournal.com]

I was a little surprised Dr. Kleiner wasn't brought up with this theme. But it is a very broad subject.

[mandydax.livejournal.com]

Mmm, foursies! This is a red-letter day! Well, technically yesterday was, but I almost never see these 'til Tuesday. I can't believe I wasn't the only one wondering about the penny-taste of blood. Yay, la_trombonista!