LJ Daily Answers: 28 January 2005

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

This week we are welcoming chaosvizier back to the United States from Mauritius. I hear that New York City threw a blizzard to mark the occasion. Good luck digging out, suckers!

1. Which German Field Marshal who commanded the Deutsche Afrika Korps during World War II was nicknamed "The Desert Fox"?

"Arnold Schwarzenegger. 'I keel you, you Afrikan girly-men! I keel you with my foxy body-builders muscles!'" - jelymo

"Rommell, which just goes to show he needed a better press agent. I mean how intimidating is this?
" - silver_u_glass

"I'll bet there's a movie about him. It could be called 'Desert Fox' and be filled with action, action and more action! And subtitled German just for that authentic feeling. And Nazis. Prince Harry could do a cameo!" - meandstuff

(Unnecessary harshing on Prince Harry. +1. -CV)

"The Red Baron--shot down over Ghana by Snoopy in 1943." - silent_r_infork

"Field Marshal Johann Gambolputty de von Ausfernschplendenschlittercrasscrenbonfrieddiggerdingledangledongledungleburstein von
knackerthrasherapplebangerhorowitzticolensicgranderknottyspelltinklegrandlichgrumblemeyerspelterwasserkurstlichhimbleeisenbahnwagengutenabendbitteeinnürnburgerbratwustlegerspurtenmitzweimacheluberhundsfutgumberabershönedankerkalbsfleischmittlerauchervon Hautkopft of Ulm, Hitler's right-hand man." - prettypinkkitty

(+1, Monty Python's Flying Circus. -CV)

"His enemies called him 'Panzie'. He hated that. A lot. It's why he drove tanks." - drewbeartx

(Gotta work off that aggression somehow. -AL)

"Isn't that a Sting song? 'I dream of Germaaaaaans . . . I dream of foxes in the desert...'" - siegeofangels

"who cares about the Germans anyway? They can't even spell 'Afrika' right. Look, it has that red line from spell check under it." - rhiannon3j

"What's with the K's replacing C's. I hate when people do that, Helllllloo it's go Carts and it's Crazy not Kwazy, and it's Cool, not kewl. There is nothing Cool about the word kewl. K is such an annoying
letter, why does it have to steal all of C's glory. The other day I was at a store and there is a sign that says 'Kidz Kloz' are on sale. *smacks forehead* What can you even say about that?" - gnomeprincess

"*shnoogles the Teutons* We should all spell Afrika with a 'k'. It just looks cooler." - ataralas

"Desert Fox. That would make a cool GI Joe character. He could have a little picture of a fox on his helmet. But he still wouldn't be as cool as Destro. I mean, come on - a Chrome Head! How cool is that?" - chrysoberyl

(No one was cooler than Destro. -CV)

"Babbette Dietrich sure could whip up a mean strudel." - llefser

(Are you referencing Babette's Feast here? -1. How a movie about food could ruin my appetite is beyond me. -CV)

"Scrappy young Erwin 'Desert Fox' Rommel, who along with unlikely best friend, the firey General George 'Hound' Patton. Raised in the same forest, the two plucky heroes find as they grow that they must become enemies. Mickey Rooney is touching as the voice of Erwin." - aki

"For some reason, when I read this, I think of Drakkar Noir. Isn't that a perfume? Where's the connection? Please help me." - stagemanager

(I'm afraid you might be beyond help. -CV)

"Oded Fehr in The Mummy. He’s HOT." - kokopellinelli

(The ladies in the audience give you full credit. -CV)

"as opposed to Samantha Fox.. who.. while not having anything to do with the desert.. had some pretty great tits.." - tarpo

(The men in the audience give you full credit. -AL)

"Rommel Rommel Rommel. He's the hamburgler's favorite general." - mcclintock

(And THAT is the line of the show, folks. We are slain. +1, extreme funny. -AL&CV)

Correct Answer: Erwin Rommel.



2. Meryl Streep stars as a Danish Baroness who plants coffee, gets it on with Robert Redford, goes on safari, and generally waxes poetic in which 1985 film?

"Trick question, Trick question. This is always used to weed out players that claim they are male. No male has ever watched a Meryl Streep Film!" - stevenmallory04

"I Know Who You did Last Summer." - sooster

"ooo coffee and a danish sounds yummy" - spam_with_wings

"We were channel-surfing the other day and a Meryl Streep movie was on. I don't know which one, though. I just had time to say "That's Meryl Streep" before my husband flipped to the next channel. He said I only recognized her because of her nose." - jtersesk

"You know, when I first read the phrase 'waxes poetic', I got a horrible image of Meryl Streep giving Keats a bikini wax. It was not a nice image. At all." - lizzyrose89

"why would Robert Redford want to get it on with Meryl Streep? He could do so much better." - marasca

(Yeah, like sskipstress's mom. -CV)

"My mother always said she'd put Robert Redford's slippers under her bed." - sskipstress

"I know it wasn't Gorillas In The Mist, that was surely set in Brooklyn. They don't plant coffee in Brooklyn. I think." - stagemanager

"I think it was a prequel to Hamlet. Those crazy Danish nobles." - silent_sybil

"I want to have a clver answer here, I really do, but I'm just getting this horrible horrible mental image of Meryl Strep and Robert Redford doin' it. And they're both old and wrinkly." - aki

"Imagine having the name of Meryl Streep. That must suck." - rhiannon3j

(Her name works pretty well when it comes time to sign checks. She's loaded. -AL)

"Redford's character was supposed to be British, but Redford refused to attempt the accent. Given the spectacular failure of Kevin Costner's accent in Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves several years later, Redford showed that when you stick to what you know -- looking cute and smiling pretty -- you can still make a fortune." - demongrrrl

"I actually like this movie. It has Swahili in it. And, if I recall, it is somewhat decent Swahili, as opposed to the Swahili in The Ghost and the Darkness which had Michael Douglas speaking very bad Swahili. Or George of the Jungle which had some african guides speaking excellent Swahili. But, Out of Africa was about middle of the pack." - mshenzi

"My favorite characters were the lions." - ajmcoqui

"Was it the one where the lion was eating people? No I think that had Brad Pitt. And wasn't made in the 80s." - chrysoberyl

(No, not the one with the lion eating people. No, that one did not star Brad Pitt. Yes, it was not made in the 80's. You get a -2/3. -CV)

"Aut auf Aahfreecuh." - feochadan

(I am 99% sure that Arnold Schwarzenegger did not cameo in this film. -CV)

Correct Answer: Out of Africa.

"Originally the film had Paul Neuman in the Streep role and was called 'Out in Africa' but this was, after all, Reagan's America." - kenshardik



3. Who uttered the famous phrase "Dr. Livingstone, I presume?", and where was he at the time?

"Mrs. Livingstion. She had a terrible case of Dementia and had a difficult time with faces and names." - froggie_girlkel

"That was Dr. Livingstone himself. He was standing in front of his mirror, practicing that very quote. Later he realized that it would make a lot more sense if somebody else said it." - lordfeepness

"Pater Moeskroen! Dutch band, they've got a song called Dr. Livingstone on how us whities should've stayed where we are, but in a humourous way. They're quite good really." - dracothelizard

"Somehow that brings Sean Connery and the League of Extraordinary Gentleman to mind, why... I don't know. I guess because he was in Africa at the time, but I don't remember where, Nairobi maybe. All I could think of during that entire movie was SNL's Celebrity Jeopardy. 'You back off, Trebek! You wouldn't have known that if you didn't have that card in front of you!'" - rhiannon3j

"Spock, in an episode where they travel back in time and land on Earth, or at least a world parallel to Earth. This is also the same episode that coined the phrase "Dammit, Jim, I'm a doctor, not a scientist!" as quoted by our famous Dr. Livingstone. And understandably so -- Kirk can be quite frustrating at times." - jelymo

"The dude with the thing… Awww who was that guy? Renfield? No wait… That was the spider eating man bitch from Dracula…" - spockaccino

"the jungle. The actual jungle, not Upton Sinclair's "The Jungle," which is full of mashed human limbs and rat bits. Ick." - goat003

"Jughead from an Archie comic…he was in a library closet at the time. Is it sad that I remember that?" - kokopellinelli

(No, young lady. It's only sad that you read Archie comics. -CV)

"Mickey Mouse, on a "Read-a-Long" story. Well, that was the version I heard." - temima

"Bugs Bunny to Daffy Duck in one of those huge black cauldrons being cooked by a tribe of african pygmies." - mcclintock

"Also famously said by Ernie to Bert in a Sesame Street version of the story, which is probably where most of us know it from. Because muppets are the key to knowledge." - lotusbiosm

(Curious how comics, cartoons, and muppets form the foundation of our quizlings' knowledge base. -CV)

"I forget the name of the village...began with a U...Ujiji, Uhha, Ublata...ok, I'm making those up...but Henry Stanley in Tanzania I do remember" - calchandler

(Very nice, barely remembering the town name of Ujiji. You get bonus props. -CV)

Correct Answer: Henry Morton Stanley, in the village of Ujiji near Lake Tanganyika, Africa



4. What nation was barred from participating in the Olympic Games from 1964 until its return in 1992?

"Where can you find lions? Only in Kenya..." - a great many of you.

(+1, just because I love that toon. -CV)

"Damn you all to the waiting area by gate A3 in the Pittsburgh airport next to the moving walkway that talks all night, for I have that Kenya song going through my head because of you." - sskipstress

"The Republic of Congo, although I guess if they were barred from participating, they should have been called the Republic of Con'tgo." - afterwards

(Mmmmm... delicious punnery. -CV)

"Russia, because it is snowy and cold." - yueni

"Russia, when their female athletes stopped using steroids and looking like men." - thinksheknowsya

"it must have been atlantis cuz it was under water for a little while" - spam_with_wings

"I don’t really see why no one likes France, though. Any nation whose people as a whole can eat snails without puking seems okay to me." - kokopellinelli

(And for the first time in LJDQ history, a comment that includes French props. -CV)

"You mean the country returned in 1992? The only place I can think of that disappears and returns later is Brigadoon. I'm going with that." - lordfeepness

"Mordor" - comingtoterms

"Jamaica, because they continually tested positive for drugs (really?!) But then they were allowed back into the olympics after the olympic committed watched "Cool Runnings" and decided that Jamaica could play as long as John Candy supervised." - theworryrock

"But... but... but... you're black!" - tiercel

(+1, Lethal Weapon 2. -CV)

"Sealand, because there weren't even people squatting on the oil derrick to field a handball team, let alone all of the track and field events. It's a whole lot harder than you'd think to practice the 440 on an oil platform in the middle of the North Sea, anyway." - llefser

"The Alien Nation" - doomgirl

"South Africa, because of apartheid. I honestly can't think of anything funny about that." - silver_u_glass

(That's ok, we've got drewbeartx to back you up. -CV)

"Apartheid-land! With fun rides like the You-keep-on-your-side-I-keep-on-my-side Spinning Teacups!" - drewbeartx

"The Smurfs, although they got kicked out again in 1992 after testing positive for illegal drug use.. damn those mushroom houses." - permogod

"South Dakota, for lack of talent." - stevenmallory04

Correct Answer: South Africa.



5. What is the name of the a cappella group that provided vocals for Paul Simon's 1986 album Graceland, and was also nominated for two Grammys in 2004?

"Paul Simon? Graceland? Cappela group? History questions, please?" - spymunster

(Today spymunster learns a new phrase rapidly becoming prevalent in the English language: "pop culture". -CV)

"If there's anything that sucks worse than Paul Simon, it's Paul Simon with an a capella group doing backup. If there's anything that sucks even worse than that, it's Sting joining in." - silent_r_infork

(Ah, is there anything better than Sting hate? Not in this quiz... -CV)

"Outkast. "Hey Ya" is a remarkable feat of blending harmonies, flowing melodies, and clear vocals. Some would even call it heavenly. I've heard the Pope has been known to listen to this song during his daily praise, shaking his Pope-booty in God's name. I've also heard that God is very pleased with this, and believes that Outkast may be the way to Salvation." - jelymo

"The B Sharps" - alexwentzell11

(+1, The Simpsons. -CV)

"The name has something to do with the town they were from and something about cows, I think." - lotusbiosm

"Rockapella, the dudes that sing 'Where in the World is Carmen Sandiago?" They are the only a cappela group I know and are thus my default guess. Plus Carmen was sometimes in Africa, and thus they have an association with the topic. And the Chief was an african-american, more association indeed." - mcclintock

(Your logic is sound. Wrong, but sound. -CV)

"Man, I'm sick of Bobby McFerrin" - llefser

(Full credit. -CV)

"Milli Vanilli" - doomgirl

(-1, lip synching. -CV)

"Oh! It's that group that sang with Kermit, isn't it? "Amazing / Beautiful / Creatures Dancing... *insert the rest of the alphabet here* and X marks the spot 'neath the / Yellow moon where the / Zulu chief and I did meet." *pause* What? I like Sesame Street music. Except for Elmo. Annoying little fucker." - aki

(Once again, muppets provide knowledge. -CV)

"Black Ladybird Mambo #5." - theworryrock

"I know it's Ladysmith Black Mambazo, and I recall reading that several of their singers (including their leader, Joseph) were killed in Rwanda. So it's all very well and good for Paul Simon to make a showy political piece about South Africa, but where was he when his friends were getting murdered?" - demongrrrl

Correct Answer: Ladysmith Black Mambazo.

"Which I honestly thought was a deadly snake found in the heart of the Sahara until about two years ago." - meandstuff



6. If you ruled an African nation, what would be the crowning achievements of your reign?

(First, some genuinely helpful and serious players among our quizlings. It's nice to see such humanitarian spirit. -AL)

"I would be elected on a platform of ending corruption, government waste, and the random amputation of limbs for indimidation purposes." - chrysoberyl

"Feeding people? Setting up health clinics? You know, something different from the norm." - tiercel

"I'd have to go with a serious thought and that would be to put a stop to female genital mutiliation." - permogod

"1. NO MORE FEMALE GENITAL MUTILATION. Ever.
2. Expansion of programs that help civilians become self-sufficient. Programs like The Heifer Project or other programs that I've read about (but can't find the links to right now) that enable farmers to irrigate their crops without hauling water for miles.
3. Expansion of medical programs. Millions of lives in Africa can be saved just through basic health care education." - demongrrrl

"Protecting the wildlife." - calico321

"Acheiving the cancellation of the third world debt, cutting Aids, free Aids drugs, proper education..." - nellie_darlin

"We'd see a massive drop in HIV infection rates, because I would improve sex education, access to condoms, and make everyone get tested regularly." - marasca

(And now, the inhumanitarian spirit... -CV)

"Opening a Starbucks/Walmart." - quite a bundle of you. Capitalist pigs.

"I dunno, why do I have to have a goal? Can't I just be a despot in peace?? God, you people and your expectations. Sod off." - uninhibitedmuse

"Bring pith helmets back into style. I mean, come on, pith helmets rule, although you do have to be careful when saying "pith helmet" in mixed company." - kenshardik

"Other than my huge man-harem? Hmm. That’s a tough one. Maybe I would kick someone’s butt. One of those jerky dictator guys. Yeah, I’d do that." - kokopellinelli

"Dressing like a cat, being a token member of the Avengers and flirting with whitebread UN envoys." - lots42

(Captain America's Avengers or Richard Steed and Emma Peel's Avengers? -CV)

"Building up armies, getting two extra guys at the being of every turn, then taking over Australia, then South America, gradually depleting anyone stupid enough to try to take asia or europe. Finally going on a grand march and taking over the world." - stevenmallory04

(We'll take a different track and give the Geek Of The Week award to stevenmallory04 for being a Risk gamer. -1 Armies for you. -CV)

"I don't know, but I hope it would involve mongongo nuts." - siegeofangels

"Getting Lions to play chess." - doomgirl

"Kenya. I would totally rule Kenya. My claim to fame would be teaching all the lions and tigers to dance along to its new national anthem." - jelymo

(Yes, I linked to it again. I can't help it. -CV)

"I'll get a puppy, name it Okonkwo, and kick it a lot. Yep, that's me, the puppy-kicking AfriQueen." - diimmortales

"I would have everybody in the nation abandon their jobs and work on building me a time machine. Once I had the time machine, I'd go back in time and kill Hitler. Who could argue with that?" - lordfeepness

(Someone obviously didn't play enough Command and Conquer: Red Alert. Joseph Stalin and his Tesla brigades did more than their share of damage in that alternate history... -CV)

"I would kill Sally Struthers and stop her annoying ads...ohhhh the children!" - thinksheknowsya

"Healthcare. And monkeys. And Kryptonite. It's a seeeecret." - afterwards

"I wouldn't mind being queen. I'd mandate all ljdq quizzes have to be questions I know." - rhiannon3j

"I'd want to rule that nation that Eddie was from in 'Coming to America', the happy one with the bath maidens. Oh yeah." - mcclintock

Correct Answer: "I would stop the spread of AIDS. By personally teaching people how to use condoms if that's what it takes." - sskipstress

(I daresay that's called taking a "hands-on" approach to the problem. -CV)

And there you have it, all the knowledge you really need about the Dark Continent, wrapped up in one neat and tidy little package. With extreme cold striking the East Coast and extreme drunkenness striking the West, we've contained the unbounded middle of your collective wisdom and unleashed it. Whatever that means. Tune in next week for the continuing saga- Will we ask six questions? Will we have a theme? Will Ang finally get that Red Ryder BB-gun she's always wanted? Only time will tell...

Rock on,

AL&CV

Comments

Africa Quiz = funny

[angledge.livejournal.com]

Good work, everyone. CV, I apologize for not providing many comments. So sleepy ...

And mcclintock? Just want to let you know that I've been wandering around all week muttering "Rommel Rommel Rommel" sotto voce, & giggling at inappropriate moments at the mental image of the Hamburgler riding a Panzer through the Sahara.

[kokopellinelli]

Wow! FOUR answers! New personal record, YAY!

...

And um...I don't read Archie comics anymore. Not for years. Because I hate them. THEY WERE A SILLY ADDICTION! I HATED how they NEVER used periods. ALWAYS WITH THE EXCLAMATION POINTS. WTF.

*is so ashamed*

[shinga.livejournal.com]

Heee! The highlight of my Fridays. *hugs the quiz*

And I haven't given answers in two weeks. SLACKER! *hides*

[llefser.livejournal.com]

After that awful pun, I'm suddenly not so sure that I'm in love with afterwards anymore.

Formatting Hell

[kenshardik]

Ugh, that long "Monty Python" quote totally messes up my LJ display! I hate scrolling sideways!

Shame, LJDQ formatters! Shame!

Re: Formatting Hell

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Your lack of 1024x768 display power does not earn our sympathy. Scroll, I say! Scroll like you've never scrolled before!

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Jughead's crown will be your eternal Dunce Cap Of Shame. WE SHAME YOU SO!

Re: Formatting Hell

[kenshardik]

1280x1024, beeyotch!

And I still hate horizontal scrolling... unless it involves Latin.

[spymunster.livejournal.com]

Pop Culture and me don't get along... :-D

[permogod.livejournal.com]

that just made my morning :)

[kokopellinelli]

*curls up on the floor whimpering*

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Aww, how could you not? She's so cute and s-pun-ky!

Re: Formatting Hell

[mshenzi.livejournal.com]

FOr some reason, I was curiously impelled to read every single syllable of that unbelievably long name.

Re: Africa Quiz = funny

[mshenzi.livejournal.com]

ha hah h ah.

want to thank yall (asante sana), for the delectable africa quiz. I had no idea Livingstone was in Tanzania. Funnily though it got me thinking about the name ujiji. lets see...

Mji: city
Uji: mush
Kijiji: village

technically and literally, I suppose the word ujiji means village-ness. but I can't help thinking that (if you use the -ji suffix) it might possibly mean mush yourself...

hmmm...

[rivetkitten.livejournal.com]

I take it diimmortales disliked Things Fall Apart as much as I did when I was forced to read it...?

Re: Formatting Hell

[diimmortales.livejournal.com]

I was curiously impelled to read every single syllable of that unbelievably long name too... aloud. With proper pronunciation. In a bad German accent.

[diimmortales.livejournal.com]

Actually, I really liked it.

I just enjoy kicking puppies.

market research

[angledge.livejournal.com]

Could you please specify exactly what part of your LJDQ Experience (TM) made your morning? Was it getting quoted twice? Was it chaosvizier's witty banter? Or was it the mental image of the Hamburgler SuperSizing an order of tanks? That's what made my morning. All week!

[dracothelizard.livejournal.com]

Bah, I still say my 'making everybody bisexual' plan would be a pretty damn good highlight of my career as ruler of an African country!

But at least I got to pimp Pater Moeskroen :D

Re: market research

[permogod.livejournal.com]

I believe what made my LJDQ Experience (TM) this morning was a combination of chaosvizier's comments, the Hamburgler and my own memory of when the_reject's english teacher sent our mom a note home one day saying she felt he needed counseling due to an assignment she had given. "How would you discipline your children", an essay, he had written that he would beat his children with cheeseburgers until cheese puffs fell out thier eyes.

The scary thing was his teacher was serious. XD

[afterwards.livejournal.com]

Oh, you love me and you know it. Your little English-major heart is Wilde about me.

[afterwards.livejournal.com]

"South Dakota, for lack of talent." - stevenmallory04

I protest! South Dakota has lots of sports talent. It's just eeeevil talent. Like Vinatieri. Go Eagles!

[elpblonde.livejournal.com]

hey! risk is fun!

...

i used to play it on the computer. and in person with my friends.

...

okay, so i'm a nerd.

Re: market research

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Well shit, man, how else are you going to get free cheese puffs?

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

Ah, the glory days of global warfare... I remember watching angledge engage legions of our college dormmates in Mac Risk back in the day. She connived and schemed and manipulated them into utter defeat with skill that would have made The Antichrist nervous. I know better than to play against her. Ever.