LJ Daily Answers: 20 July 2009
Jul. 20th, 2009 10:19 am"HAPPY FIFTH BIRTHDAY since I assume that is the theme here." -
Congratulations and a +5 for figuring out the reason for the theme. You may drink five gin and tonics today. Unless you're not yet legal, in which case you can redeem this coupon upon turning the appropriate age.
"Fifth Anniversary of DQ? I thought sure I was playing the DQ in '01, but I'm pretty sure you know your own anniversary..." -
If you were playing in '01, then you were still playing Dave George's original email-based Daily Quiz. That or you're a time traveller who played the quiz in your own future. Either way, that's worth +5 right there.
1. Fun with lyrics! Name the song and the band:
6 am day after Christmas
I throw some clothes on in
The dark
The smell of cold
Car seat is freezing
The world is sleeping and
I am numb
"I know that in certain European countries, the day after Christmas is called Boxing Day. Which, growing up, I took to meant everybody got their ears boxed." -
"at least he's waiting until Boxing Day to kill himself" -
"I just got kicked out of a random stranger's house after crappy sex...fml" -
"Dude. I'm Jewish. 6 AM the day after Christmas, I'm just waiting for the drugstore to open so I can get my half-price red-and-green M&M's." -
"I don't know, but if you're numb and cold, turn the heating up in the car. Or use the heated seats. They may make you feel like you've wet yourself, but you get used to it, and it's better than freezing." -
"Dude who wrote that must have lived in upstate New York, right on Lake Ontario! Sounds like my childhood winters!" -
(Damn dirty Rochester. -CV)
"'Kids, Don't Sleep in the Car' by Ani Difranco." -
"Ben Folds: My Laundry, on occasion. It's so nice of him to do good things for others." -
"How does one drown in a fucking Brick, Ben?" -
(Well, there's the old "cement shoes into the Hudson River" trick that we've been using for the better part of a century... -CV)
"Ben Folds Five People Into A Small Paper Aeroplane and Sends It Crashing Into A Brick" -
"Apparently people who like this song aren't real Ben Folds Five fans and are looked on with disdain by the real fans. God, it's depressing though." -
"Even the frigging Pop-Up Video for this song is depressing." -
"Having grown up a sheltered Mormon girl, it was years before I figured out this song was about abortion. Then it kind of creeped me out... but I got over it. It's still a nice song." -
"'Fun' with lyrics??? Try the single Most Depressing Song EVAR!" -
"Why is it that the only song I've ever recognized from the lyrics on this quiz is the super-depressing abortion one?" -
(I really should read the lyrics more thoroughly next time I do this... -CV)
"Ben Folds Five, 'Brick.' A surprising success when compared to their previous shingle, 'Wood.'" -
Correct Answer: "Brick" by Ben Folds Five
"To my wife's annoyance, I discover music 10 years after it was popular. Right now this song is on my iPod ALL THE TIME. Next, this band called Pearl Jam I've heard mention of." -
2. Dolly Parton starred in, and wrote the theme song to, which 1980 comedy film?
(Check out my awesome avoidance of the word "titular" in this question. -CV)
"She is like Barbie, but the worst example you could have of her. You know, super annoying, big-boobed, tiny waisted Barbie. Oh wait, that's every Barbie ever made..." -
"Animalympics, where Dolly Parton played the safety net for the high-rise balance beam fencers." -
"My Boobs Arrived Before I Did" -
"The Dukes of Hazard!" -
"J.U.G.G.S." -
"Guys and Dolly's" -
"Invasion of the Booby Smashers" -
(Those aren't "pods", people... -CV)
"These Boobs Are Made For Walking" -
"Titty Titty Bang Bang" -
"Twin Peaks" -
"Broads on Titway" -
"Black Sheep, later remade by Australia into a comedy-horror" -
(+1 because Black Sheep (the one with the mutant sheep, not the Christ Farley/David Spade one) was funny. -CV)
"Hoo-ray for Dollywood,
That redneck, country Dollywood!
Where any good ol' boy
Or Texas hick
Can get real sick
On a roller coaster ride!Iä! Iä! Yog-Sothoth! Iä! Iä!" -
(While this is a typo from your previous answer, I had to include it because the thought of a cthulhian horror invading Dollywood makes me laugh every time I think about it. +1, cut-and-paste win. -CV)
"I wonder if she named her boobs after both kinds of music, 'Country' and 'Western'?" -
(+1, The Blues Brothers. -CV)
"Hehe, when i think of Dolly the thought that comes to mind is Miss Congeniality 2, where Sandra Bullock tackles her and pokes her boobs. Hehe." -
"I can't believe that she's in Hannah Montana now. How the mighty have fallen." -
"When I was a kid, I would wonder what kind of fictional land Dolly worked in where she didn't have to be at work until 9 am, and still got to go home at 5. As an adult, I still wonder the exact same thing. I'm going to go to Dollywood and find out." -
"Sometimes, I wish I'd had the chutzpah to pull a Nine to Five on my last boss." -
"Pi to 11 just didn't quite have the same 'you’re-going-to-sing-this-at-the-next-'talent'-show' ring to it." -
Correct Answer: 9 to 5
"Thanks, LJDQ. Now I'll have that stuck in my head. all. night. Sheesh." -
(Another successful traumatic incident, courtesy of us. -AL&CV&LL)
3. What are Shahada, Salah, Zakah, Saum, and Hajj?
"I don't know, but let me be the first to welcome the new LJDQ assigned CIA operatives" -
(So that's who was following me into work today... -CV)
"Shamba, Salumba, bo-bomp-bam-boom! Oh, it's not a doo-wop group?" -
"The way you sound when you have your tongue frozen to a flag pole." -
"Things you yell out before you hit someone. Try it. It works, and scares the heck out of people. Hajj! Smack!" -
"Batman sound effect words which were cut from the TV show because no one could think of appropriate actions to associate with them" -
(The next time I punch someone in class, I am totally shouting "ZAKAH!" at them. -CV)
"These are either Frank Zappa's grandchildren or the output from sneezing into voice-recognition software." -
"Those are the sounds my cat makes when it wants me to get a roll of paper towels. How does the food keep its shape like that?" -
"Other names considered in the 'Harold and Kumar' series." -
(Ironically, Salah and Zakah actually are chizillin' in Guantanamo Bay right now. -CV)
"the Arabian edition of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles?" -
"The secret identities of the founding members of the Justice League of Arabia." -
"That's the names of the five kids who hang out with Captain Planet in the Islamic version." -
"The middle east version of the Scooby Do gang, except that their show has a talking falafel instead of a dog, and the dance numbers eat half the episode." -
"The Arabic 3 Stooges. Zakah and Saum have different legions of fans, kind of like Curly vs Schemp." -
"The African children adopted by Bruno" -
"Angelina's new kids, if she can beat out Madonna." -
"What are Madonna's next five children, Alex?" -
"The dwarves that Bombur ate on the way to the Lonely Mountain." -
(Now that's not fair. Considering how much weed Bilbo smoked en route, you know that he satisfied his case of the munchies with at least two. -CV)
"The other astrological phenomena in the vicinity of Za'ha'Dum." -
(+1, Babylon 5. -CV)
"I'm fairly sure that Hadji was the token non-caucasian in Johnny Quest." -
"the names used in Snow White and the Hijab for the five adorably dwarfish Orthodox men who teach that bitch not to wear any red lipstick." -
"The 5 tortises of the apocolypse - they're never counted because they're slower than the horses." -
"The people the run the Kwik-E-Mart down the road." -
"Will I go to hell for thinking 'The Five Pillars of Islam' sounds like a great band name?" -
(Considering all the previous answers, I think hell will be too full and you'll be waitlisted. -CV)
"The five pillars of Islam, which you have transliterated oddly." -
(If there's anything I've learned about Arabic, it's that transliteration is the most questionable and subjective science known to mankind. When the same guy writes his own name two different ways, ALL BETS ARE OFF. -CV)
Correct Answer: The Five Pillars of Islam
"I bet the Muslims said, 'Hmm... the Christians have trinity. That's three. We'll go one better than them.' And then another one had to butt in and say, 'And one for good luck!'" -
4. What structure was built on the site of the old Washington Hoover Airport?
"The New Washington Hoover Airport" - 15 -1's all around, smartasses
"Megamaid!" - 8 people planning to steal Druidia's air supply
"[insert vacuum/sucking joke here]" - I ran out of fingers and toes counting this
"A statue of a terrified dog. They hate Hoovers." -
(I would chase my ex-girlfriend's cat with the vacuum; the cat was 28 pounds of fat and sloth, but it sure could bust a move when properly motivated to exercise. -CV)
"Oh, let it be a stocking factory. Please tell me it's a stocking factory." -
"Either a condominium, a bank, or a Starbucks." -
(If this had been NYC, that would totally have been the correct answer. -CV)
"Hoover Dam" -
"A Hoover E. Cheeses!" -
"A Hooters!" -
(Uh, that was question #2. -CV)
"The Hall of Justice" -
"I bet you it was a parking lot." -
(Well, it does have a pretty friggin' huge parking lot. Half-credit. -CV)
"Ronald Reagan International... fairly appropriate when you really think about it in a non-brainwashed fact-based way." -
(Only partial credit; RRI made WHA obsolete, but it was located elsewhere. -CV)
"The pentacle, sacred site for Wiccan conspiracy theorists where all the funky occult shizzle goes down." -
"The Pentagram, where Ashcroft, Bush and the Council of Zombies planned spiritual warfare" -
(That mystic shit didn't work for Hitler, and it didn't work for them either. Too bad! -CV)
"There is evil there which does not sleep." -
"They built the Pentagon over it after the aliens crashed into the airport" -
(And they keep crashing into it. Stupid aliens. -CV)
"I always thought the Pentagon, much like Madison Square Garden, would not be a pentagon at all, seeing as Madison Square Garden is not on Madison Ave, it's not a square, and it's certainly not a garden." -
"When I was a kid, my dad worked there. Mom used to take me shopping in the mall underneath the Top Secret floors." -
"The Pentagon. Because the Dodecahedron would have too expensive and complicated, even for the military. Plus it would have attracted D&D geeks like bees to honey" -
(I'm not ashamed to admit it; I'd totally apply for a job in the Dodecahedron. I'd be their janitor and I wouldn't care because HOLY SHIT DODECAHEDRON! -CV)
Correct Answer: The Pentagon
5. Fun with quotations! From which of Shakespeare's plays do we get this quote:
We few, we happy few, we band of brothers;
For he to-day that sheds his blood with me
Shall be my brother
"It's 'We band of buggared'" -
"To Think that I Saw It on Mulberry Street." -
"Great speach, awful play." -
(That sums up most of Shakespeare's works. -CV)
"It's that one where everyone dresses like a ren fair reject and talks all funny!" -
(Ditto what I just said above. -CV)
"I think all of Shakespeare's histories are probably the same play with different titles. Think about it. Has anyone actually read more than one without dying from boredom? Scholars don't count, they're clinically insane." -
"Was it the one where they all died, or the one where only half of them died?" -
"Julius Caesar, or as it will be known generations from now, 300." -
"They became blood brothers after that line, tested HIV+, and eventually died of AIDS. Sorry, Shakespeare." -
"The one with Kenneth Branagh in it. Oh, wait, that doesn't narrow it down much, does it?" -
"For he today that pours his milk in cereal with me shall share my breakfase, on this Rice Krispies Day." -
"Probably one of those plays named after the fifth of some long dead kings. Why can't popes and kings come up with unique names? Or add in superfluous ys like the other parents. Queen Elysabeth." -
"one time I was seeing Henry V and had arrived sort of early. Sadly, so had the idiots behind me, who spent the entire time before the play and during intermission wondering what the V stood for." -
"I had no idea 'Band of Brothers' was a Shakespeare rip-off!" -
"I do not know, but 'netters yet unborn
Will count themselves accursed they were not here
To write with us upon St. Quiz-pin's Day." -
(+1, making us look classy. -AL&CV&LL)
Correct Answer: Henry V
6. What would be the best birthday present ever?
"Money!" - lots of you. I'd chastise you for your capitalistic wants, but really, I want the same thing, so we'll call it even.
"

How about some delicious Portal cake?" -
(The cake is a lie. -LL&CV)
"Enough money to pay for the party.. with enough left over to pay someone to clean it up afterwards.. and to pay bail for whoever would need it." -
"I would say 'Peace on earth' but that would mean that *I* would have to be nice to everybody. So I'll go with 'Powerball Jackpot.'" -
"The Brazillian women's beach volleyball team." -
(Is there ever a wrong time to link to this picture? We at the LJDQ think not. -CV)
"no more Howie Mandel" -
"Real live dinosaures. I wished for them every birthday for years. Mind you, I'd return velociraptors in a heartbeat." -
"Best for us? You rename to the LJWQ and go daily!" -
"I'm thinking my very own TARDIS would be nice. I mean, who wouldn't want to travel in time and space?" -
"A pony, and a plastic rocket" -
(+1, Serenity. -CV)
"a pony" -
(
. -CV)"Today is actually my birthday (I'm 30 as well, just to compound it). I got very excited at work this morning when a fire engine turned up, sirens and lights going, complete with firemen. Unfortunately they were actually called out to investigate the fire alarm which went off, and not for me *sigh*." -
(Happy belated birthday! And to you too,
"my birthday is next week. Holy crap, I'm going to be 28! Beer for everyone!!" -
(Happy future birthday! -AL&CV&LL)
"To crush my enemies, to see them fall at my feet, to take their horses and goods, and hear the lamentation of their women." -
(+1, Conan The Barbarian, mostly. -CV)
"nekkid Hugh Jackman, in my bed, with a big old tub of butterscotch frosting." -
(Yeeeeeech, butterscotch. -CV)
"FIVE GOOOOOOOOOLD RIIIINGS. Because then I could Ebay them and pay off my credit cards" -
"Penny Crayon's set of pencils. Whatever she draws comes to life. Think about that for a second." -
(Sounds pretty bad for me... Anyone who's played Pictionary with me (most notably AL or
"Ownership to the number 5 (which would obviously pay $5 per use, but I can use '5' for free, you
And, in the words of the late Walter Cronkite, that's the way it is.
Five years! That's a lot of quizzes. A lot of funnies. And, as always, all thanks to you guys who keep on playing and bringing the funny. Keep up the good work! Tell your friends! Spread the word! The more who play, the merrier we all get!
We'll be seeing you all real soon. Like tomorrow-ish, probably. Rest easy, for tonight we dine in hell!
Rock On!
AL&CV&LL