LJ Daily Answers: 4 June 2007

[chaosvizier.livejournal.com]

"A German quiz! germankitty and I will rule it! This will be our quiz and we will call it unser Rätsel!" - affenbrotwald

Thankfully, germankitty did not type out all her answers in German out of spite. That was thoughtful.

"It's Germany week! Time to bake children into yummy confections!" - woap

Please. That could be any week.

"As my high school German teacher taught me:
Morgen, morgen, nur nicht heute
Sagen alle faulen Leute.
Translation: 'Tomorrow, tomorrow, not today' say all lazy people." - i_calql8

My father said that to me all the time.



1. Mozart's "Serenade #13 for strings in G major" is more commonly known as what?

"hahaha, you said g string" - b_hulsmans and more than half of you

"Ode to G-unit. That Mozart, he was a pee aye em pee." - das_kabinett

"fugue me! I have no idea." - antinomic

"Elevator Muzak Sonata #3" - wiredwizard

"Now you've got me thinking about Barry Manilow. Thanks, ever so. :::vomits:::" - stagemanager

(I have no idea how that happened. -CV)

"Ah, that would be the very popular, 'da, da da, da da da da da da, da, da da, da da da da da da, da da, da da da dada da...'" - smittenrosebud

"My kids had a toy that played Eine Kleine Nachtmusik as blocks were placed in the slots. One of the receptors on it got damaged and it started playing it non-stop. I had to perform an emergency batterendectomy to get it to stop." - deza

"But you know what I really like about Mozart? His balls." - affenbrotwald

"Eine Klien nachtmusic or something. I dunno why he named it for Kevin Kline, but hey. Whatever floats his bewigged boat." - flawed_karma

"Eine Kleine Nachtmusik which is only slightly more famous than Ich Eine Kleine Berliner - A little jelly doughnut." - alstaria

"And if they're at all familiar with German, they will be sure to pronounce the guttural CH in 'Nachtmusik', because a hard C becomes 'Nacktmusik', and this means something entirely different! And while 'A Little Naked Music' may be most lovely, there are many circumstances where it would NOT be 'A Very Good Thing'." - sarcastro

(And the skin flute makes its professional debut... -CV)

Correct Answer: Eine Kleine Nachtmusik



2. Which 1981 submarine thriller featured Jürgen Prochnow as a WWII submarine captain?

"When I was little, I didn't understand that submarines were for under the water, and regular boats were for over the water. So, I was constantly wondering why there were boat boats and sausage boats. It made no sense." - nakedblueninja

"Now that is just a MANLY german name there. Rrowwrr....
Umm, don't tell my wife I just said that." - umbralcorax

"In the toooooown where I was boooooorn, lived a maaa-aa-aan who sailed the seeeeas! And he toooold us of his liiiiife in the laaa-aa-aaand of submariiiiines!" - elfie_samurai

"now I have 'we all live in a yellow submarine' stuck in my head. Damn you, LJDQ!" - unleashedfreak

"The Land That Time Forgot." - pewter_alyssum

(+1, Edgar Rice Burroughs. -CV)

"I love Submarine thrillers. They're like Star Trek, but dumber." - lots42
"Star Trek: The Posiedon Adventure. In which Kirk finally gets to play out his Moby Dick complex." - niroby

"One of these days Das Boot is gonna walk all over you." - schizospider

"Laura was highly disappointed to find out that 'Das Boot' was about war and not a winter shoe sale at Nordstrom." - mark_laura

"My geology professor last semester, in order to demonstrate the physical presence of cross-cutting transform faults along divergent plate boundaries, performed a one-woman reenactment of the submarine chase from 'The Hunt for Red October' wearing high heels and a pencil skirt. I love college." - babybokal

(There is almost nothing in this answer that I understand. You may have the spiffington Award for Complete Gibberish. -CV)

"That's my Dad's answer for everything. No, seriously - 'Dad, what's for dinner?' 'Das Boot...huh?'" - 4492

"Is *that* what Das Boot is about? I thought it was a movie about some german guy with a shoe fetish." - dorei

"My brother and I watched that movie all the time when we were in grade school. Then he started touching himself while watching TV. That was the end of our shared TV time. And thank you very much for reminding me." - affenbrotwald

Correct Answer: Das Boot



3. What automobile's tagline translates into "Out of love for the car"?

"Careful, that kind of talk can get you banned from LJ these days..." - childofatlantis

(Only if it's with your underage sibling car. -CV)

"Farfegnugen is
difficult to put into
a haiku: success!" - fax_celestis

"Always wear your seatbelt -and- a condom when you love your car, otherwise, you'll get Herbies." - etcet

"Alex, I'll take 'Things no Yugo owner ever said' for $300." - motown_deserter

"I usually try and read the small print in car commercials. Try it. Read the last few sentences and you'll see that half the time, the deals the voice over announces don't actually apply at all. Or that the dealer can do whatever the hell he wants. It's insane." - lots42

"a causa d'amore per la macchina sounds so romantic. but it kind of sounds like love machine. 'you wanna get in my love machine?' = worst pickup line ever." - bizzatch

"Porsche. ("Too small to get laid in, but you'll get laid the minute you get out.")" - cmseward, sskipstress

"didn't Hitler kind of commission the Volkswagen?" - unleashedfreak
"Honestly, the People's Car seems like it should be Chinese or Russian, not German." - potassiumman

"When I was younger, I always wanted a VW Beetle, and then they made a mini pink one for Barbie, and I decided that maybe I'd prefer a monster truck." - endlessairports

"Volkswagen. It won out in an in-house survey group over 'From the Genius that Gave the World the Panzer'" - blindgeoff

"I'll go with VW. They've got a lot of love in that company. Especially for Brazilian hookers and blow." - affenbrotwald

"I once saw a headline 'Beetle Causes Auto Accident', and it described a lady losing control of her car when a Beetle flew through the window. I was wondering why she didn't, you know, explode into a million bits when the Beetle went through the window, then I realized it meant an insect, not a Volkswagen Beetle." - woap

Correct Answer: Volkswagen



4. Which liqueur features the following poem on its bottle labels:
This is the hunter's badge of honour,
that he protect and nourish his game,
hunt sportingly, as is proper,
and honour the Creator in creation.

"I'm Irish. The only liquor that exists for me is Guinness and whiskey." - umbralcorax

"I really need to drink more! Who knew alcoholic beverages were fraught with poetic joy!" - joscelin

"Poetry? On a beer bottle? That's like the theory of relativity scrawled on a stripper's navel." - theburningdoll

"You mean they actually write shit on booze labels?!" - buzz

(I really never get past A) the proof and B) "WARNING: PREGNANT WOMEN SHOULD NOT DRINK THIS SHIT." -CV)

"Does a master hunter require a master baiter?" - sskipstress

"wtf. there's religious beer?" - elaran

(You clearly have never partaken of The Chosen Beer. -CV)

"Who the fuck would read the poem when you could be getting pissed?" - puredeadthingy

(Probably explains the dearth of correct answers... -CV)

"I went fishing once, and that's kind of like hunting. I caught the biggest fish in the pond, so I guess there's something to beginner's luck. I had to throw it back, though, which is kind of an allegory for dating. I've had to throw back all the people I've dated, too." - syrazemyla

(Did you throw them back in the lake, is the question? -CV)

"Jagermeister... Once I sold a bottle to a man who came in raving about foreigners being evil and only English born and bred and made things were worth money." - liseuse

(There is great irony there. -CV)

"I used to work in a store in Green Bay,
One day a lady came in and wanted to make a purchase,
"What do you want I asked?"
"Liquer," she said, so Lick her I did,
Now I don't work there any more" - tweeti, who tried to blame her hubby drbear, but we didn't fall for it.

"Jagermeister - the only drink that has more herbs and spices than The Colonel's secret recipe for fried chicken." - spotts1701

"Jagermeister, which ranks far below Clamato, Mountain Dew, and bukkake as the most disgusting drink on earth." - fragbert

(While I'm hesitant to classify bukkake as a "drink", I nonetheless agree with you. -CV)

"as vile as Jagermeister is, it's worse when mixed with light soy sauce." - potassiumman

Correct Answer: Jägermeister

"Just to clear it with everyone, knowing this tidbit does not make you an alcoholic. I think." - tickle_smoosh



5. Which song from the musical "Avenue Q" belongs here?

"I have yet to see Avenue Q, but it always makes me snigger because its title is the name a friend of mine uses as a nickname for the anus. He used to work with a lot of elderly ladies and we needed a code for talking about sex." - liseuse

"Electric Boogaloo?" - tweeti

(No, that'll be Avenue Q Two. -CV)

"PUPPETSEX! God, I'm gonna have an unproductive day." - babybokal

"Däs Internet Ist Für PØrn!" - fragbert

(Your crimes against umlaut will not be forgotten. -CV)

"Ok. Now you're expecting me to be cultured." - elaran

(Cultured... you clearly have not fully grasped the magic of Avenue Q. -CV)

"I actually am a waitress, and if I ever dropped glasses and people clapped, the shit would hit the fan." - endlessairports

(People not wearing underwear today: 9.
People surfing internet for porn: 19.
People who are a little bit racist: 5.
Losers People with B.A.'s in English: 3.
People in the wrong musical singing "Springtime For Hitler": 4.
People dancing naughtily while singing "I Can Make You Feel Special": smittenrosebud.)

"Schadenfreude... You know, the whole rationale behind the House of Representatives." - illogicalvulcan, ceemonster
"Happiness at the misfortunte of others? That is German!" - sawjockey,

Correct Answer: Schadenfreude



6. If you could invade any country, where would you strike, and why?

"Liechtenstein" - clearly we had no idea that we had such a rampant Swiss population on the quiz.

"Oz! Not Australia, Oz. I want to dominate those flying monkeys! Dorothy will be my bitch! And Toto, oh, what I will do to Toto. My God, this question has made my week. What marvelous fantasies I will have." - antinomic

(-1, just because. -CV)

"Dude. What would I want with a country? I can't even keep my apartment clean." - unleashedfreak

"I think a country is too ambitious for me to invade all by myself, therefore I shall invade the neighbor's back yard and annex their hot tub." - sskipstress

(Baby steps, girl. Start small, work your way to the top. -CV)

"The Falkland Islands. For strategic sheep purposes." - whiski_sour

(I will gladly trade you rock for those sheep. -CV)

"There's two things I can't stand - people who are intolerant of other people's cultures and the Dutch. Amsterdam, you're going down!" - kestrel127

(From what I hear, it'll only take 200 Euros to get Amsterdam to go down, if you know what I mean. -CV)

"I'd invade the Moon. Even though that's not technically a country. I just want to rule the Moon." - syrazemyla

"All I want is a little peace.... A little piece of Poland, a little piece of Russia." - lanzaned

"Indonesia--I can pile all my armies there, then Australia would be easy pickin's, and I can get a free 2 armies every turn, plus I can push my way into Siam to keep other players from dominating Asia." - i_calql8

(+1, RISK. Nothing gets that sinister gleam of domination in AL's eyes like a freshly setup RISK board. -CV)

"I'd level the Alps; Germany needs an unhindered view of the Mediterranean!" - germankitty

"Canada. Seriously, guys, I've had it up to here with your shit. All that lumberjacking? It stops now." - endlessairports, who will have at least 11 allies
"but I think if we moved to attack them, Mexico would seize its chance to take back Texas." - newbia

"France, so I can steal their cheese. Plus, it would be easy 'cause, well, FRANCE." - alstaria and several other France haters, unsurprisingly

"Belgium, because I want chocolate, and good chocolate! Do you hear me??? DOES ANYONE HAVE CHOCOLATE TO DONATE??? *sobs*" - elf_of_doriath

"Britain, for I deeply desire their literature, their history, and their mythology. Oh, and their beer." - cygna_hime

"Switzerland. They're so peaceful...and they have delicious chocolate...and banks...can't forget the banks...us Jews love banks...which brings this week's quiz up another level of mindfuckery." - braynstorm

Correct Answer: "Easter Island because those heads are up to no good." - akiyasan



And thus endeth our Germanic Language Quiz of the week. Freude, schöner Götterfunken, Also sprach Zarathustra, Deutschland über alles, Ich bin ein Berliner, and all that quatsch. Godwin's Law is suspended for the duration of this post. Other things suspended for the duration of this post include lederhosen.

Thanks to everyone who played! Hope you enjoyed, and as always, share with your friends! Pimp out this quiz to one and all! Don't be selfish!

Rock On!

AL&CV&LL